I've been whipping myself for missing last week's post. Even when nobody reads this blog, I still like to try to keep it regular. nyway, here's ten songs to flagellate myself to...
10. Doris Day - The Deadwood Stage
Doris Day is Calamity Jane. I'm not a huge fan of 50s musicals, but I do like this song. Shame Day's co-star Howard 'Clayton Starbar' Keel doesn't turn up on backing vocals.
Whip crack-away, whip crack-away, whip crack-awaaaaaayyyyy!9. Everclear - Misery Whip
Everclear are virtually unknown in the UK, so I'm not sure how got into them... other than through the "chuck-out" box in the radio station where I used to work, where all the CDs that the station would never play in a million years ended up. Actually, I discovered some of my favourite artists through that box - including pre-Common People Pulp, Aimee Mann and... erm... Jellyfish.
This isn't one of Everclear's best: it's a pretty average album track in truth, but I was such a big fan back in the day, it still brings back good memories.
8. Suede - Whipsnade
At first glance, Brett would appear to be singing about the zoo here... which would make its inclusion a bit of a stretch, even for me, were it not for the second verse of this superior Suede b-side...
We are only youngSee - it's got an actual whip in it and everything. Sorted.
But we style out future in the shadow of guns
We are not idle rich
So we smile for tomorrow with a bitch of an itch
'Cause when the stylized kick of the filmstar whip,
Cracks down on the millions, cracks the kids on the hips
We'll be moving like Nuryev at night
7. Jeff Bridges & The Abiders - She Lay Her Whip Down
Yes, that Jeff Bridges.
Coolest man on the planet?
He calls his band The Abiders.
6. The Allman Brothers - Whipping Post
Classic 'my woman done me wrong' song by the Southern whipping boys.
5. Tim Buckley - Make It Right
You probably wouldn't expect Jeff's dad to be quite so kinky...
Trying a little trick honey, ah, that you never used before4. Icicle Works - Whipping Boy
I wanna be your victim, your sweet little victim of love
Come on and beat me, whip me, spank me
Mama, make it right again, oh no, no, no, no
Poor old Ian McNabb... why does everybody always put the blame on him? Great bluesy riff 'n' growl on this one.
3. Gomez - Whippin' Piccadilly
Gomez were a pretty good band, spoilt by too high an opinion of themselves. I remember seeing them play live in the late 90s and they did about 27 encores. Actually, we left before the end, so they might still be doing those encores as I type. Come on, guys, you were hardly James Brown.
This was their biggest hit, and it still sounds cool. Watch out for a very young Toby Jones in the video.
2. The Rolling Stones - Brown Sugar
Slavery, misogyny, heroin, cunnilingus, S&M... the lyrics of Brown Sugar are pretty controversial... if anyone can actually figure out what the hell Jagger's going on about. He himself has admitted he mishmashed a lot of different ideas together and wasn't sure what message he was trying to give (if any), and also that he'd censor himself if he were to try to write this lyric again.
All that said, this is rock 'n' roll at its purest - and if Tutti Frutti was about... well, what Tutti Frutti was about - then this is a worthy heir.
Scarred old slaver says he's doing all rightSee also When The Whip Comes Down and Keef's Whip It Up. These boys obviously have some kind of fetish going on...
Hear him whip the women
Just around midnight
1. Devo - Whip It
For about five seconds there, I did consider the idea that there might be a better whipping song than Devo...
What were the chances?
Which one gets you all whipped up?