Friday, 17 May 2019

The United Kingdom of Song #31: Uttoxeter


Last night I woke up at 3am and cried, "Utoxeter!"

I had no idea where Uttoxeter was, or even how to spell it... double t, who'd have guessed?

Apparently it's in Staffordshire, quite near Alton Towers, a theme park I frequented as a much younger man and will probably have to return to when Sam's a bit older, although you won't see me on any of the rides. Not any more. I get queasy at the thought of the carousel. Once, as a teenager, I rode the Corkscrew, the most exciting rollercoaster in the UK. They told me the other day that it's not even there anymore. My past is just relics and ruins.

I didn't hold out much hope of finding a song that mentioned Uttoxeter, especially when the only pop star to originate from the town appears to be Dave Sampson. You know, of Dave Sampson & The Hunters fame. Come on, they had a #29 hit in 1969, you must remember it?

No, me neither.

Fortunately, good old Graham McPherson came to my rescue with this amusing little ditty...

Our man is feeling rather wonderful
Lying somewhere comfortable
A-bathing on his yacht...oh
Our man is drinking drinks exotica
Dreaming of Uttoxeter
I think not

In years to come, I'll look back and think, "I could have been a proper writer, you know... if I hadn't wasted so much time finding songs about Uttoxeter and writing about them for six people to read on the internet"...*



*I almost said "six strangers" there, until it occured to me that I feel like I know you lot better than I know people I see in the flesh on an almost daily basis. Make of that what you will.

Of course, I should have checked in with Nigel first...



2 comments:

  1. Uttoxeter, one of those names I feel like I've known forever yet, like you, realise I know absolutely nothing about. Perfect for HMHB too. It just has that ring to it. A strange sounding mixture of Utterly Oxford and Exeter, so very English!

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  2. Suggs was on the radio the other morning as he has a new show about different parts of London, one of which being, obviously, Camden Town.

    I seem to remember that Stephen Fry and Hugh Lawrie used to do a series of sketches featuring Uttoxeter - Has a great sound to it that work which lends itself well to comedic moments (although the residents would probably disagree).

    As for your last comment, yes it is a bit of a worry how we can spend so much time writing random stuff about places like Uttoxeter "for about six people to read on the internet" but as CC once pointed out to me when I said the same thing, it's a great little community we have here, definitely not strangers. And lets face it, you would be writing stuff anyway and you already are "a proper writer".

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