Mid-Life Crisis Songs #82: Pain In The Backside

I ache all over. 

When I get up, I ache as I get out of bed, ache as I walk down the stairs, ache when I get into the car.

When I get up off the sofa to go into the kitchen, I stiffen up like an old man. Same when I get out of my desk at work to go teach.

My thumbs have some serious ache going on. Maybe it's arthritis, maybe it's carpal tunnel. I told the doctor about it and she said, "I've never heard of that before."

My back's been bad since I fell down the stairs and broke my arm, getting on 15 years ago now. Slipped disc. Nothing they can do about it.

But this latest ache is a real pain in the backside. 

For the last few years, I've been carrying my wallet around in my back pocket. I used to keep it in my coat, then I got a new summer jacket that didn't have very good inside pockets, and the wallet went in the back of my pants. Everyone does it, right? If not your wallet then your phone. You see it all the time. (Not that I walk around staring at other people's backsides... or maybe I do and I just don't want to admit it.)

Lately though, it's been hurting to sit down with my wallet in my back pocket. Never did before, but now it's got really uncomfortable. Turns out when I google it, there's a whole thing about it. Who knew?  

Only... where am I going to keep my wallet now?

Well, my friends are gone and my hair is grey

I ache in the places where I used to play

And I'm crazy for love but I'm not coming on

I'm just paying my rent every day in the Tower of Song

It's Friday 13th today. I hope you all get through it unscathed...