You've seen Se7en, right? I mean, I'm about to spoil the ending, so... come on, you must have seen it.
Oh well, I guess if you haven't seen it yet, you're probably not planning on watching it since it's got Kevin Spacey in it and we're not allowed to watch Kevin Spacey movies any more, even ones in which he plays the psychopath he actually turned out to be. (To be clear: I don't really think Kevin Spacey is a psychopath. I don't think he's a very nice man, but that wouldn't stop me watching his movies. That's what we call The Morrissey Conundrum round these parts.)
Anyway, previously on "Radio Songs", I began telling you about my time working as a "producer" (fancy name) / "phone op" (actual name) on the late night phone-in show. And I mentioned that the presenters I worked with probably had as many fans as they did haters. It comes with the territory. You might even say that you're not doing your job properly if you're a radio phone-in host and everybody likes you. To be honest, you're probably not doing your job properly as a human being if everybody likes you either.
Here's one little story which illustrates this perfectly.
One night, Presenter 1 received a parcel through the post addressed to the show. This would not be an uncommon thing. People do, on occasion send gifts or home cooking to radio presenters. Smart radio presenters do not eat home cooking from listeners.
This particular parcel had not been hand-delivered. It had come via the Royal Mail. First class post.
Inside was a shoe box. Taped to the box was a note which read: "My thoughts on the show."
What do you think was inside the box?
Bear in mind that we're talking 25 years ago now - simpler times. Nowadays a presenter's first thought may well be: "Is it a bomb?" Back then, we were far more innocent and trusting.
Anyway, it wasn't a bomb.
It wasn't even Gwyneth Paltrow's head. (See, I told you I was going to spoil the end of Se7en. Sorry.)
What do you think was inside the box?
I'll tell you on Monday.
37. Lemonheads - 6ix
It's OK, the Lemonheads spoiled the end of Se7en long before I did...
Oh no. I presume not a toe with green nail varnish on. My guess is that it was a turd. A human one? If so, you have to wonder how much trouble someone goes to get it in the box!
ReplyDeleteYou want a toe? I can get you a toe. I can get you Aimee Mann's toe...
DeleteI'll second C's something steamy and smelly?
ReplyDeleteThe word suggestion should come after C's name in case anyone suggests that she was the guilty party!
ReplyDeleteI should hope not!
DeleteJust one missing word and my reputation is in tatters!
DeleteOops, a bit of unintentional reputation shredding - Very funny guys.
ReplyDeleteYes the obvious contents would be something steamy and smelly but I think it's going to be something none of us would ever guess - Looking forward to the big reveal on Monday.
I'll go with the majority and guess that we're talking faecal matter here. If so, I'd have to agree with C that one would almost have to applaud the effort involved in such a ghastly endeavour.
ReplyDelete