Wednesday 6 February 2019

My Top Ten Life Lessons Volume 1: Never...


Everything I know about life, I learned from pop songs.

Here are ten things pop singers told me I should NEVER do...


10. The Boomtown Rats - Never Bite The Hand That Feeds

Listen to your mum and dad, kids... and grumpy uncle Bob.

9. Adam Ant - Never Trust A Man (With Egg On His Face)

Adam certainly heard the voices from Outer Space, didn't he?

But we loved him for it.

8. George Benson - Never Give Up On A Good Thing

Why would you? See also #5. And #3, for that matter.

On the other hand...

7. All About Eve - Never Promise (Anyone Forever)

Don't go out tonight
Don't leave me alone
It doesn't feel safe in our English home
There's fear in my heart
In my ear a whisper
Are you afraid too, or is it just me?

Written many, many years before Brexit, that was...

6. Bomb The Music Industry - Never Trust A Man Without A Horribly Embarrassing Secret

I don't want to make new friends
My friendships always end up in a blaze
I just wanted to be something that I'll probably never be
A happy, well-adjusted human being

5. Andrew Gold - Never Let Her Slip Away

'Nuff said.

4. Sparks - Never Turn Your Back On Mother Earth

Are you listening, Mr. Trump?

3. Boney M - Never Change Lovers In The Middle Of The Night

Never never change your lovers in the middle of the night
Everything may look so different in the early morning light
Never never be too hasty when you're groping in the dark
What you're getting into may be just a lark

There's no arguing with Boney M.

2. Idles - Never Fight A Man With A Perm

I'm a lover, not a fighter... but I wouldn't do that either.

1. Billy Bragg - Never Buy The Sun

Do what the Scousers do...



Any pop stars ever told you never to do something? Did you listen?


14 comments:

  1. Good to see some early Adam Ant in there. And cannot argue with your #1.

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  2. Back in 1964, Dionne Warwick said "You'll Never Get to Heaven (If You Break My Heart)2 - a warning which was repeated by The Stylistics about 10 years later.

    And I'll bet not many people know that Freddie Mercury did harmony vocals on Andrew Gold's "Never Let Her Slip Away".

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    1. And then, a few years later Dionne sang "Why do you have to be a heartbreaker?"... so I'm guessing he never did get to heaven.

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  3. Didn't know that about Never Let Her Slip Away - BUT, if what Andrew and George say is true, why do so many of us not heed their advice.

    All Saints did a song called Never Ever but maybe it would come under Top Ten songs with a very long talky intro - Or, maybe it will never, ever, crop up at all!

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    Replies
    1. I have considered a Talky Intros Top Ten... though I'm not sure All Saints would be on there.

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  4. My apologies. I've double checked and it wasn't Freddie who sang harmony on "Never Let Her Slip Away". Thought I'd discovered a musical gem but I was wrong.

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    Replies
    1. Shame. That would have been up there with Bob Holness playing the sax on Baker Street.

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  5. The House of Love, just 'Never'

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    Replies
    1. "Never, never gonna let you down"... verging on Rick Astley territory there!

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  6. Assembly - Never Never.
    A song warning about the dangers of Hire Purchase agreements

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  7. Never Bite The Hand That Feeds is good advice!

    I always feel guilty getting up late ever since I discovered the song Years by Mike Ruekberg: "You don't get those years back. Time you wasted sleeping late".

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    Replies
    1. Feeling guilty about my Saturday lie in right now, Chris!

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