Thursday, 8 October 2026

Celebrity Jukebox #87: Jeffrey Archer


The google link to the BBC obituary read: “Jeffey Archer: successful novelist, disgraced politician and convicted liar”… yet when I clicked on it, the headline appeared to have been edited to the somewhat less inflamatory: “Jeffrey Archer: bestselling novelist whose political career ended in scandal”. I suspect somebody at the BBC got their wrist slapped.

Two sentences from the obituary however tell us everything that’s wrong with the political system…

“His political career was paused in 2001 when he was jailed for four years for perjury and perverting the course of justice.”

“He was released in 2003 and returned to the House of Lords until he retired in 2024.”

Anyway, I hadn’t expected much in terms of complimentary lyrical tributes to Mr. Archer… I mean, he’s in some rather dubious company here.

Kenneth Baker is a sick man
And the Pope is a sick man
Helmut Kohl is a sick man
And Jeffrey Archer is a sick man
Edwina Currie is a sick man
And Margaret Thatcher is a sick man
And Noel Edmonds is a sick man
And George Bush is a sick man
And Ronald Reagan is a sick man
But most of all, Le Pen is a sick man

Bill Pritchard – Kenneth Baker

Poor old Noel Edmonds, eh?

Perhaps Jeffrey Archer will be better remembered for his books than his dubious political career. I don’t know – I’ve never read any of them, and I doubt I’ll be starting soon.

You asked for innocence
Instead of Christmas presents
I got you a prayer book
With a foreword by Jeffrey Archer

Christian Fitness - All Ghosts To Medicine Counter Four

What else do we have to remember the (dis)Honourable Gentleman by?

Bing Selfish - The Fall And Rise And Fall Of Jeffrey Archer

There was also a track by Goldie Lookin’ Chain which featured a graphic description of prison life, perhaps best left out of this obituary.

Still, not to worry, eh? True immortality comes for Mr. Archer thanks to The Beloved… and much better company than he found himself in with today’s opening tune.

Sir Bufton Tufton, Jean Paul Sartre
Zippy, Bungle, Jeffrey Archer
Andre Previn and the LSO
Hello, hello, hello, hello

Sir Bufton Tufton indeed.



Wednesday, 7 October 2026

Listening Post #56: Plastic Fox


The jury's still out on Leeds Legend Mik Artistik and his Ego Trip, though he's been recommended to me by a couple of people now and Iggy Pop appears to be a fan. I suppose there's a healthy dollop of John Cooper-Clarke in here. It's growing on me...



Tuesday, 6 October 2026

Namesakes #209: The Riot Squad


Often when I select a band name to feature on Namesakes, I do so thinking: "That'll be a nice short one. Probably only two or three and I'll be done." And then the floodgates open.

I predict a riot...


RIOT SQUAD #1


London-based Riot Squad who were kicking around in the mid-60s and managed to rope in a certain young David Jones (aka Bowie) to sing with them for a while in 1967. They covered The Velvet Underground's Waiting For My Man and also recorded this Bowie original... which owes quite a debt to the Velvets itself.

The Riot Squad - Little Toy Soldier


RIOT SQUAD #2


Meanwhile over in Escanaba in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, around the same time Bowie was rioting through London Town, these nattily dressed young gentlemen were throwing back to the 50s. They also did a cover of Ferry 'Cross The Mersey which I chose not to go looking for.

Riot Squad - Come On, Let's Go


RIOT SQUAD #3

UK-based ska band from the late 70s / early 80s. Eventually they stopped rioting and just became The Squad.

Riot Squad - She's So Fine


RIOT SQUAD #4


Mansfield punks active between '81 and '84, reunited in 2003 under the law that states all old bands (except The Smiths) must get back together in the 21st Century. They have a sentiment that never goes out of date though... 

Riot Squad - Fuck The Tories

Wonder what they make of Reform?


RIOT SQUAD #5


Cape Town punks, making noise around the same time as the guys above... so eventually they changed their name to Riot Squad South Africa to avoid confusion.

Riot Squad - Security System


RIOT SQUAD #6


"One of the hottest and most popular reggae bands in South Florida" when this video was recorded, sometime around 1989. What the hell is going on?

Riot Squad - What the Hell Is Going On?


RIOT SQUAD #7


Texas punks from the 90s who eventually changed their name to The Staggers.

Riot Squad - Nosferatu


RIOT SQUAD #8


Spanish Oi! band from the early 21st century...

Riot Squad - Street Rock n Roll


RIOT SQUAD #9


Belgian punks from around the same time...

Riot Squad - Another Heartbreak


RIOT SQUAD #10


New Jersey punk-metal hip-hopper Rob Gee and his mates, circa 2014. 

In case you're wondering, this "unique blend of Metal and Hardcore makes this track stand out like no others before it". I do like a nice bit of gratuitous hyperbole... even if it does make me rather anxious.

Riot Squad - Anxiety


RIOT SQUAD #11


Also possibly known as Brian Setzer's Riot Squad... or maybe it was just another Setzer solo project that discogs seems to have given a "Riot Squad" label to in 2014. It's hard to tell sometimes.

Riot Squad - Rockabilly Riot


RIOT SQUID #12


Believe it or not, I'm trying to get more selective with this feature, and weed out some of the chaff to save us all a lot of bother. So there were plenty more Riot Squads I threw out this week. But I couldn't resist finishing with these guys, even though they won't get past George... from 2026. What a great year that was, eh?

Riot Squid - Lower Highs


Which ones are a Riot? And which ones are just Rot?

 

Monday, 5 October 2026

Sunday, 4 October 2026

Snapshots #468: Sleepy Songs


No. 

Sleep.

Till...

Answers!


15. Twins reunited after being separated from disgusted August.

Gus Gus - Snoozer

14. Bubbly from Milton Keynes.


Bucks Fizz - Talking In Your Sleep

Because Crystal Gayle would have been too obvious.

13. Harvard, Princeton & Yale.


The Ivy League - Tossing And Turning

12. They probably know where Shergar is.


Horse Thief - Drowsy

11. Why China leads the world in magnet production...


Because they mine the most rare earth minerals.


10. Cary on Christopher, with Mr. Cody. 


Grant Lee Buffalo - America Snoring

9. Weapon, cycle and ribbon.


The city of Saint Etienne is known as the home of "l'arme, le cycle et le ruban".


8. Lilac meat has definitely gone off.


"Lilac meat" was an anagram.


7. That's a dirge, boy... try it in a different key.


"A dirge, boy" was also an anagram.


6. A group who stand in the background and give commentary about Smokin' Joe.


Smokin' Joe Frazier, that is. And a Greek Chorus.


5. This could be a case for Mulder and Scully...


UFO - Lights Out

4. Bunch of drips.

Wet Wet Wet - Goodnight Girl

3. Richard Neville.

Check your history books.

Kingmaker - 10 Years Asleep

2. Frequently needed a scrunchie.


The Poni-Tails - Early To Bed

1. Cut here.


Anagram!!!


Wake up early next Saturday for more...

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