Friday, 26 May 2017

My Top Ten Roger Moore Songs

The best tribute I've read to Sir Roger Moore came from The Guardian's Peter Bradshaw, who concluded: "The Connery Bond was feared and admired... but the Roger Moore Bond was loved."

Roger Moore was the Bond of my childhood, and he will always be my Bond. Yes, those films might seem cheesy and corny now, they certainly don't have the grit of Connery, but they have a lot more warmth. And let's face it: Bond is essentially a ludicrous character. He works if you play him with a raised eyebrow (and no one had better eyebrows than Roger Moore), but take him too seriously and he becomes an unpleasantly violent, misogynist killer with little regard for the lives of innocents... which pretty much sums up the last two Daniel Craig films for me.

10. ELO - Can't Get It Out Of My Head

Sir Roger's first starring role on TV was in a BBC children's series based on Sir Walter Scott's Ivanhoe. Way before my time, but probably not before Jeff Lynne's...
Bank job in the city
Robin Hood and William Tell
And Ivanhoe and Lancelot
They don't envy me...
Apparently, Roger felt "a complete Charlie riding around in all that armour and damned stupid plumed helmet".

9. Robbie Williams - The World's Most Handsome Man

I know lots of people can't do with Robbie's cheeky chappie routine, or his humongous ego... but I find both quite endearing... in small doses... because I really don't think he takes himself at all seriously. Just like Sir Roger...
Y'all know who I am
I'm still the boy next door
That's if you're Lord Litchfield and Roger Moore...
8. The Toy Dolls - James Bond Lives Down Our Street

I tried to avoid songs that just reference James Bond for this chart: there are loads of them and I wanted my tribute to be more about Roger than his most famous role. However, The Toy Dolls do mention Roger (and Sean) in this ridiculous cartoon punk song, so...

7. Mansun - Moronica

Roger wasn't just Bond. Here's Paul Draper name-dropping the role that made him famous... The Saint.
You've got more halos than Simon Templar
You've said more Betty's than Frankie Spencer
Your gun is bigger than Captain Scarlet's
Your face is covered in cheap mascara
6. Scouting For Girls - I Wish I Was James Bond

As if Robbie Williams wasn't bad enough, let's further irk the musos with a pure slice of noughties piano pop. In my defence, Scouting For Girls may be annoyingly catchy, but they don't really sound like anything else that's been successful in the 21st Century. In fact, they remind me of Gerard Kenny...
Since I was a boy I wanted to be like Roger Moore
A girl in every port, and gadgets up my sleeve
5. Supergrass - Prophet 15

In which Gaz Coombes gets trapped in a cloud with an eclectic selection of heroes, including Peter Cooke, Oscar Wilde, Marvin Gay, Joan Of Arc, David Banner... and good old Rog.

4. The Kinks - Daylight

Being one of the greatest chroniclers of the English disease, it's inevitable that Ray Davies should namedrop Roger at some point...
Middle-aged bankers crack their backs and wish they were young and in their teens,
Lonely spinsters dream of dating Roger Moore or Steve McQueen.
3. Amy Winehouse - You Know I'm No Good

When asked why he thought Amy had included him in the lyrics of her hit single, Roger quipped that she must have wanted a word that rhymed with 'door'... or couldn't think of one that rhymed with 'Connery'.
By the time I'm out the door,
You tear men down like Roger Moore...
2. Pulp - 97 Lovers

Originally released in 1986 (yes, Pulp were around back then: this was just before their second album), just after my Bond hung up his Walther PPK for good. Roger Moore apparently hated guns and was often quoted, post-Bond, saying how he hated the way the franchise glamorised "men with guns". Maybe that's why he played up the comedic elements of the character. And I'm sure that's why he appealed to Jarvis, who always likes a good Roger...
I know a woman with a picture of Roger Moore 
In a short towel and dressing-gown pinned to her bedroom wall
She married a man who works on a building site
Now they make love beneath Roger every Friday night... oh!
1. Wings - Live & Let Die / Carly Simon - Nobody Does It Better

The two best Bond themes of the Moore era, from the band The Beatles could have been and the lady who found clouds in her coffee...

Now put your clothes on and I’ll buy you an ice cream.


  1. A great Top 10 Rol. Moore was my favourite Bond as well (and those are my favourite two Bond themes), but I knew him first as The Saint - yes, I'm that old. Talking of The Saint, no room for 'Simon Templar' by Splodgenessabounds? RIP Roger.

    1. I remember The Saint repeats from when I was a kid. Even then, I liked the fourth wall breaking intro where he gave that sly smirk as he glanced up at the halo.

      Didn't know that Splodgenessabounds track or it would definitely have featured. Off to track it down now.

  2. When I saw the Saint as a kid I didn't understand why the cartoon stickman character only appeared in the intro before it went into the boring live action Saint.

    1. That's the perfect kid's reaction.

  3. Fantastic Top 10, Rol. I am with you both that he's the best Bond ever. He came to my focus in the very early 70's as Simon Templar and even there he had a kind of ironic and smooth acting that made him famous later as Bond, James Bond

  4. The Gaurdian tribute was spot on I reckon - He may not have been the most energetic or Fleming Faithful Bond but he was probably the most well-loved. Funny that you say he is your Bond because he is probably mine too - He was the Bond of my teenage years and early twenties but also possibly the most viewed on television over the years.

    Great Top 10 as ever. Your double A-sider at No. 1 contains two from the top four of my all-time favourite Bond themes. (Sorry got too numbery there what with Top 10s, 2s, 4s and 1s)

    1. As the longest running Bind, he crossed generations.


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