I was in the local shop the other day, and the proprietor was bemoaning the state of the economy. A tin of beans which cost 29p when he first opened now costs £1.55. And he ordered a new crate of HP Sauce yesterday and the price had gone up by £12!
What can we do?
Well, all I can do is look for songs that mention "the original brown sauce", which is ironically named after the House of Parliament, those same bastards who got us into this mess.
HP Sauce is sold throughout Europe... which makes me wonder if sales suffered after we deserted the EU. Here's the late Arno Hintjens, lead singer of Belgian rock band TC Matic...
I'm like meat and potatoes
Eggs and bacon, fish and chips
Rock'n'roll, H.P. Sauce
I feel like Pinocchio with broken strings
Heaven is higher than the tree
I saw myself on MTV
Somewhat further into Europe, we find Austrian punk Hans Platzgumer, who shares his initials with the famous brown sauce, and so named his 1989 EP A Portion Of Geniune HP Sauce...
Back in Blighty, The Ravengers were a 90s punk band that released a couple of records on West Sussex-based Detour Records. That's as much as I could find out about them, but their solo album did contain a self-composed jingle promoting HP sauce with the line "He likes a bit on the side..."
The Ravengers - HP Fruity Sauce (Jingle)
Finally, here's Gilbert O'Sullivan, with a b-side that displays some rather old-fashioned notions (Gilbert's quite shocked by the idea of two men getting married), but then... it was 1977.
And I've seen some how can I put this
Funny things in my life
Like the time a woman said sorry to a man
She stabbed with a knife
And in view of all of this nonsense
I think it's only fair
To point out that despite its faults
England still has HP sauce
I don't want to live forever
I just want to live as long as I can
Gilbert O'Sullivan - As Long As I Can
Not the best crop today, I'll admit. I'd almost given up on finding a worthy final tune. And then I heard this...
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