Monday 30 October 2023

Celebrity Jukebox #113: Shaft & Chandler


Who's the black private dick that's a sex machine to all the chicks?

Who is the man that would risk his neck for his brother man?

Who's the cat that won't cop out when there's danger all about?

Richard Roundtree may not be a household name, but his most famous role guaranteed him immortality.


They say this cat Shaft is a bad mother
(Shut your mouth)
But I'm talkin' 'bout Shaft
(Then we can dig it)

As you'd imagine, dozens of rappers name-drop Richard Roundtree in the hope of channeling even a fraction of his effortless cool. Far less interested in cool, we have New York's Kevin Froleiks, also known as Goodbye Charlemagne, who describes himself thus: "Failed comedian. Failing musician." Here he is with an ode to facial hair...

Elvis Presley, the king of rock
And Martin Van Buren had mutton chops
And Richard Roundtree in Shaft
And John Travolta in Grease
And Henry Winkler as Fonzie
And even Liberace

They all had side burns
On the side of their face
Like a furry picket fence
Or a fuzzy picture frame
They all had side burns
Playing pong with their eyes
Two caterpillars about
To turn into butterflies


And if you didn't dig that, here's 22 minutes of Free Improv Jazz...



So no one told you life was gonna be this way
Your job's a joke, you're broke
Your love life's DOA
It's like you're always stuck in second gear
When it hasn't been your day, your week, your month
Or even your year...


Rol: Chandler

Ben: This one's a bit weirder as it's one that was in their prime on TV whilst I was a child. And now they're gone.

He was 3 years older than me.

Bet that's an odd feeling.

At least he didn't die of old age.

Tyler Perry and Joe Perry must be scared of 2027

First Luke, now Matthew.

Were they the same age when they died?

Luke was 52.

So why 2027?

Every four years, a Perry dies. 'Tis the true curse of the 21st century.








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