Mid-Life Crisis Songs #134: Honeymoon

We were lucky that Sam and I had misaligned holidays this Easter, so while he's back at school this week, I'm still off... allowing Louise and I the rare luxury of getting away to the Peak District for a couple of days peace and quiet. (Sam is being looked after by appropriate adults, in case you're on the phone to Child Services.)

So this is what passes for our Honeymoon. Appropriate (and inappropriate) tunes will follow...

Elvis Costello & The Attractions - The Long Honeymoon

Homer Banks - Before The Honeymoon

Roy Clark - Honeymoon Feeling

Bob Hope To Die - Honeymoon

Bruce Springsteen - The Honeymooners

Be Bop Deluxe - Honeymoon On Mars

City Boy - Honeymooners

Magazine - The Honeymoon Killers

Kim Carnes - Gypsy Honeymoon

Gorky's Zygotic Mynci - Honeymoon With You

Robert Earl Keen - Gringo Honeymoon

The Wake - On Our Honeymoon

Bill Callahan - Honeymoon Child

Jackie Leven - Honeymoon Hill

Robert Palmer - Honeymoon

Langhorne Slim - The Honeymoon

Daniel Takes A Train - Honeymoon

Always - My Honeymoon Hell

Paul Hampton - Two Hour Honeymoon (Definitely the most bizarre thing you'll hear today!)

The Cruel Sea - The Honeymoon Is Over

I will, of course, be following the advice below to the letter...

Don't ski naked down Mt. Everest

With lilies up your nose

Don't punt up the Ganges in a vest

And holler 'Thar she blows'

Don't fish for tunny in Meat Madras

With blotting pads as bait

Don't converse with shrimps of higher class

About the church and state

Don't dance the polka in a dhoti

Arid whistle the right of Spring

Don't recite Hamlet's soliloquy

While munching onion rings

Don' t plant a stickleback in a field

On St.Augustine's Day

Don' t sharpen your sword and beat your shield

And somersault up a brae

Don' t build a pyramid on the pole

With Frosties packets and glue

Don' t serve rubber bullets in a bowl

And call it Irish Stew

Don' t change all the water into wine

And walk on the Dead Sea

Never sing the Song of the Golden Rhine

With an augmented flea

Namesakes #12: Always

Last week I thought it was a pretty tough choice (at least between the first two options), but in the end it was a Beat down: the voting went almost unanimously to The Beat from Birmingham, with only Brian fighting against the crowd. 

This week, I’ll be there forever and a day, to quote Jon By Jovi. Yes, it’s Always…

 

ALWAYS #1

Our first Always was the nom-de-plume of one Kevin Wright, who released a couple of romantic indie records in the late 80s before continuing in similar vein as Mr. Wright. Seemingly more successful in Europe than the UK, he continued crafting witty, literary indie songs for the next couple of decades, ploughing a similar furrow to Momus and Belle & Sebastian. No idea what he’s up to now, reports of his progress dry up in the mid-00s. This is from the sole LP released as Always, Thames Valley Leather Club.

ALVVAYS #2

You see what they did there? It does beg the question why we call a W “double U” when clearly “double V” would be more accurate. Still, on the odd occasion I’ve heard this band played on the wireless, they always get referred to as Always, rather than Al-Vays, so that was good enough for me. Generally, bands that muck about with the alphabet to make their names sound more edgy or hip always annoy me. To be fair, this lot were originally called Always (because “it had a shred of sentiment and nostalgia”, despite the danger that they’d “be doomed by tampon-rock references forever”). And they only changed the spelling to avoid litigation.

Anyvvay, Alvvays hail from the unfortunately named Prince Edvvard Island in Toronto. Could be vvorse, they could come from Prince Andrevv Island. VVe all knovv vvhat goes on there. They’ve been kicking around for over a decade novv, quoting Camera Obscura, The Magnetic Fields and The Primitives among their influences. This is probably their biggest “hit” to date…

I did find another couple of artists who have taken this week’s name, but their work was so obscure or irrelevant, I opted to keep things nice and easy this week. So vote now for your favourite neverending band! Or I'll send Jon By Jovi round to serenade you forever and a day.