My Top Ten Mashed Potato Songs

For Mash, get... ten songs that will make you want to do the mashed potato...

Although the Top 3 is inevitable, this may well be the most mashed-up Top Ten I've ever compiled, genre-wise. I'm not too proud to say I Love It.

This week's post is dedicated to jjdaddyo (sorry, jj, I don't have a link anymore since blogger deleted my bloglist a while back: if you still have a blog, let me know where it is) who recommended our opening tune for the second volume of My Top Ten Supermarket Songs a few weeks back. It would have fit in well there... but it fits even better here.



10. Joe Jackson - (Do The) Instant Mash

From Joe's 1979 debut record, Look Sharp, the one where pretty girls are out walking with gorillas down my street...

9. Neil Young & Crazy Horse - T-Bone 

As previously discussed, there are by now very few subjects Neil Young hasn't written a song about, but this is out-there even by his standards. 9 and a quarter minutes of Neil complaining that he's only got mashed potato: no T-bone. From 1981's Re-Ac-Tor album, not one of  his most critically-acclaimed records. I doubt he gives a shit what the critics think. I hope he eventually got his T-bone.  

8. The Ronettes - Mashed Potato Time

There are a number of records on this Top Ten (as well as a bunch more I didn't have room for) which refer to the Mashed Potato dance craze of the early 60s. This is the one that does so most directly, originally recorded by Dee Dee Sharp, it was re-recorded by the Ronettes under Phil Spector, who then credited it to The Crystals once the Ronettes had split up. That Phil Spector, eh? What a genius / maniac / tool.

See also (Do The) Mashed Potato by James Brown, Shake A Tailfeather by Ray Charles and The Blues Brothers, Let's Dance by Chris Montez, Do The Strand by Roxy Music and Little Latin Lupe Lu by Mitch Ryder & The Detroit Wheels (for Hi-Fidelity fans).

7. Terrorvision - Discotheque Wreck

From the superb 1994 album, How To Make Friends & Influence People, Terrorvision cheekily steal the mashed potato lyrics from this week's Number One and slip them effortlessly into this superfly guitar stomper which confirms them as Bradford's finest rock band.

6. Ella Fitzgerald & Louis Armstrong - A Fine Romance

We should be hot as a couple of hot tomatoes
But you're as cold as yesterday's mashed potatoes...

Written by Jerome Kern and lyricist Dorothy Fields for the Fred Astaire / Ginger Rogers movie Swing Time, this will be more familiar to anyone of a certain age as the theme tune to an 80s ITV sitcom starring Judi Dench and Michael Williams. That version was sung by Dame Judi herself, but the problem with it was, as the rhyme above shows, this is a song that should only ever be sung by Americans... because no matter what Fred & Ginger sang in Let's Call The Whole Thing Off... nobody, British or American, ever says "po-taa-toes". 

So we'll stick with Ella and Louis, because you can't beat them. Or mash them.

5. Eminem - So Far

One of the best tracks from Eminem's 2013 comeback album, Marshall Mathers 2, this is built around the chorus to Joe Walsh's Life's Been Good and features the usual First World whinging about how hard it is to be a white, rich rap star. Luckily, Eminem understands the irony of this and... damn it, say what you like Eminem, but dude can rhyme...

Can't pump my gas without causin' an accident
Pump my gas, cut my grass, I can't take out the fuckin' trash
Without someone passin' through my sub harassin'
I'd count my blessings but I suck at math
I'd rather wallow than bask, suffering succotash, but the ant-
Acid it gives my stomach gas
When I mix my corn with my fuckin' mashed
Potatoes, so what hoe kiss my country bumpkin ass
Missouri southern roots, what the fuck is upper class?

There are some mashed potatoes in there if you look for them.

4. Nirvana - Sliver

Oh boy, I'd forgotten how much I loved this. It's so easy to remember Kurt Cobain for the tragedy, the reluctant artist stuff, the end... so easy to forget this guy had one hell of a sense of humour too. Occasionally. Here, his mum and dad leave him at grandma's house while they go to a show and he has to eat her mashed potato and can't chew his meat too good.

Grandma, take me home!

3. Wilson Pickett - Land of 1000 Dances

Na 
Nana nana
Nana nana
Nanana Nanana
Nana nanaaaaaa!

If your exposure to the above nana chorus is limited to Ini Kamoze's Here Comes The Hotstepper... here's where it came from.

I was amused to discover though that the song's original 1962 recording, by New Orleans r 'n' b man Chris Kenner, didn't feature any nanas at all though. They were added three years later in a version by Cannibal & The Headhunters. But it was Wilson who took all those nas to another level.

That said, it's interesting to hear what Jimi Hendrix and Patti Smith do with this song too.  

2. The M.A.S.H. - Theme From M.A.S.H. / Manic Street Preachers - Theme From M.A.S.H.

Of course, the Mobile Army Surgical Hospital had very little to do with mashed spuds... but then, as already discussed, very few songs on this list are actually about potatoes.

Interesting story behind this one. Robert Altman, director of the original M.A.S.H. movie wanted a song called 'Suicide Is Painless' to feature in a key scene of the movie... and specifically wanted its lyrics to be duff: "the stupidest song ever written". He tried to write those lyrics himself but couldn't get them stupid enough... so he gave the task to his 14 year-old son Michael, who wrote them in 5 minutes... and became a millionaire in the process. Not too stupid then, eh, Robert?

The thing is, there's a thin line between stupid and profound, and in the context of the film... and certainly the TV show that followed, using this song as its theme tune... this nonsense suddenly began to feel very profound indeed. I loved M.A.S.H. when I was a teen, not so much the Altman version, but certainly the Alan Alda show. I was one of the hundred million plus viewers who tuned in to the final episode and sobbed when this song played out for its final time. Stupid, yeah.

I found it impossible to choose between the original and the Manics' 1992 cover version, released as a charity single, double A-sided with the Fatima Mansions' cover of Bryan Adams' Everything I Do, I Do It For You. (Punctuation note: it's not often you see a sentence that contains three apostrophes after the s like that. Sorry, English teacher geeking out here.) James Dean Bradfield's guitar and vocal suit this song perfectly. Sadly, it would become a little too prophetic for another member of the band though...

1. The Contours - Do You Love Me?

You broke my heart
'Cos I couldn't dance
You didn't even want me around
But now I'm back
To let you know
I can
Really
Shake 'em down

Another one featuring that ridiculous mashed potato dance step. Originally written for The Temptations, who'd done a runner that day, so Berry Gordy gave it to The Contours instead when he bumped into them in the Motown corridor. It was their only real hit: but what a hit.

Of course, being of a certain age, my first exposure to this song was in Dirty Dancing. I was 16 when that film his video in the UK. It was regular Friday night viewing, at least when Ferris Bueller's Day Off (or Friday the 13th... I was a complex child) was unavailable for rental at the local video shop.





Personally, I prefer roasties, jackets or chips. But if you've got to have your potatoes mashed, I don't think you can deny the tastiness of this Top 10. Any favourites I missed out?

My Top Ten Misunderstood Songs

I often feel misunderstood. I reckon this blog is very misunderstood. We try our best, but it's so easy to sow the seeds of misunderstanding wherever we go. This week - ten songs that feel the same.

Special mention to 60s psych-rockers The Misunderstood.



10. Pink - Missundaztood

It all goes back to Madonna. If Lady Gaga is David Lynch Madonna, then Pink Alecia Beth Moore is Riot Grrrl Madonna. To be honest, this isn't one of P!nk's best - it's pretty average pop-filler material, although it was the title track of her second album. It does sum up her character quite well... but she'd record far better pop songs as time went by.  

9. The Grapes of Wrath - Misunderstanding

Forgotten (by me, at least) Canadian alt-rockers of the late 80s, this was their debut single from 1985.

8. Mötley Crüe - Misunderstood

Yes! It's been far too long since I managed to find room for a decent slice of poodle rock on this blog. It's always good to piss off the musos (then again, maybe that's why I have so few readers... do they misunderstand me?)

This is pretty sedate and serious compared to the Crüe's usual excesses, perhaps because it comes from the era when regular lead singer Vince Neal had buggered off to go and play with race cars. His (as it turned out, temporary) replacement was John Corabi, a man who obviously took things a little more seriously. Or maybe the record company were just trying to reposition the band to capitalise on the success of Guns 'n' Roses at the time. I don't claim to be a poodle rock expert, but I don't mind a little mosh now and again.

7. Electric Soft Parade - Misunderstanding

2007 single from this extermely under-appreciated indie band ("psych pop", according to iffypedia) made of up Brighton brothers Alex & Thomas White. Sunshiny guitar music that's always worth a spin.

6. Wilco - Misunderstood

Here's an interesting one, as Jeff Tweedy takes on the perspective of a disgruntled fan, still bitter over the break-up of Tweedy's previous band, Uncle Tupelo. According to what I read on t'internet, anyway. It's all a bit vague to me, just what Jeff is whinging about. Good song though.

5. Gene Clark - Some Misunderstanding

Before Roger McGuinn took over (with a little help from Bob Dylan), Gene Clark was the lead singer and songwriter of The Byrds. Later, he released a number of unsuccessful solo albums which would become far more influential and critically acclaimed after his death. Clark always claimed the album this song comes from, 1974's No Other, was his masterpiece. Forty years later, the likes of Fleet Foxes and Grizzly Bear would surely agree. 

4. The Contours - A Little Misunderstanding

Great lost Motown nugget, co-written by Stevie Wonder (he also plays drums). The Contours are more well-known for their earlier smash Do You Love Me? (which, if you're my age, you'll probably have encountered first on the soundtrack to Dirty Dancing). The lead vocal is performed by Levi Stubbs' brother Joe, having replaced original singer Billy Gordon. He only lasted one song though before Dennis Edwards of the Temptations took over. Although Joe Stubbs' doesn't quite have his brother's pipes, I still think this sounds like prime Motown - it could well have been a Four Tops song.

3. Eric Church - Mr. Misunderstood

I kind of cocked up my Best Albums of 2015 countdown by including Eric Church's The Outsiders, which it later turned out had been released the year before. This, however, is the title track from the album Eric actually did release last year (he's a prolific bugger)... and damn, if it isn't even better.

Mr. Misunderstood starts out as a song about not being into the same music as your mates... something I presume most of the regular readers of this blog have experienced at one point or other in their lives.

Now, your buddies get their rocks off on Top 40 radio
But you love your daddy's vinyl, old-time rock and roll
Elvis Costello, Ray Wylie Hubbard, and think Jeff Tweedy is one bad mother
Mr. Misunderstood, Mr. Misunderstood

 (And now I have to go out and find me some Ray Wylie Hubbard.)

Typically for an Eric Church record, though, it then goes on to tell a much bigger story (which is probably why I like Church so much - he does love words, and he ain't afraid to use them). 

2. Richard Thompson - I Misunderstood

I saw Richard Thompson play live a few years back and I was mesmerised: he may well be the greatest guitar player I've ever seen up-close. But it wasn't the fretwork that originally made me fall for him, it was the dark yet heartfelt lyrics, of which this is prime example. Here he misreads a polite brush-off as an encouraging come-on... and by god, if we haven't all been there.

She was laughing as she brushed my cheek
"Why don't you call me, angel, maybe next week
Promise now, cross your heart and hope to die".

But I misunderstood, but I misunderstood, but I misunderstood
I thought she was saying good luck, she was saying good bye...

If the synthy 90s mix from the video doesn't quite push your buttons, try the rawer live version from a few years back. Shivers.

1. Elvis Costello - Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

Originally recorded by Nina Simone in 1964 (and you've got to go some to beat her version), then perhaps most memorably by The Animals a few years later. The disco version recorded by Santa Esmerelda & Leroy Gomez that Quentin Tarantino appropriated for one of the Kill Bill soundtracks is also pretty cool (as you'll see above, they win top prize in the record cover contest). Most recently recorded by Lana Del Rey, a contemporary artist I used to have a lot of time for (the Chris Isaak Madonna?)... until she revealed herself to be a one-trick pony.

So why does Elvis Costello's 1986 cover from King of America take the crown for me? It's the voice. And the conviction. I believe every word he sings. Plus, I was a teenage Elvis Costello fan, and the records of your youth stay with you to your grave...

Baby, do you understand me now?

Sometimes I feel a little mad.

But don't you know that no one alive can always be an angel?

When things go wrong, I seem to be bad.

But I'm just a soul whose intentions are good:

Oh Lord! Please don't let me be misunderstood...

Which is your most misunderstood record? No prizes for saying 'Born In The USA' or 'The One I Love' by REM... that's an entirely different Top Ten.