My Top Ten Dinosaur Songs (Volume One)

As there's a new Jurassic Park World movie out this week, it seems an appropriate time to dust off a Top Ten that's been sitting in the cupboard for a while now.

This is part one though... next week, I'll do tens songs about specific dinosaurs (or at least ones that mention specific dinosaurs). I have a fair few pterodactyls, brontosauruses and (obviously) T-Rex, but your suggestions are welcome.

In the meantime, special mention must obviously go to... Dinosaur Jr, The Last Dinosaurs, Brontosaurus Chorus, Jurassic Five and... Marc Bolan.


10. We Are Scientists - Dinosaurs

They are scientists, so obviously they understand natural selection.

9. King Crimson - Dinosaur

Because if I didn't include this, somebody would be complaining.

I'm a dinosaur, somebody's digging my bones

8. The Stills - Dinosaurs

Dinosaurs as a metaphor for the end of a relationship, presumably.

7.  Hank Williams Jr. - Dinosaur

He is a dinosaur - and proud of it!

6. Low - Dinosaur Act

God bless the Mormons. At least they're not Creationists.

See also Matthew Sweet - Dinosaur Act - not the same song.

5. Emmy The Great - Dinosaur Sex

Speaking of evolutionary theory...

And dinosaur sex led to nothing
And maybe we will lead to nothing
And dinosaur sex led to nothing
But we will lead as far as we can lead

4. King Missile - Dinosaurs

I wanna know
About the dinosaurs
I don't know about the dinosaurs
I wanna know about the dinosaurs
Dinosaurs
Dinosaurs

Make up your mind, guys.

Beyond that indecision, this is proper mental. Hence: very good.

3. Weird Al Yankovic - Jurassic Park

Want another reason to love Jimmy Webb? He had final approval on this glorious MacArthur Park parody... and he thought it was hilarious.

Someone let T-Rex out of his pen...

2. Johnny Cash - Dinosaur Song

The wonder of Johnny Cash - he could even make kids' songs sound cool.

One was called Diplodocus
One was bigger than your school bus
One was called a Triceratops
Three horns to stop anything that hops

See also Dinosaur Pet by Neil Sedaka, sung to the tune of Calendar Girl. Obviously.

1. Was (Not Was) - Walk The Dinosaur

Well, it had to be really, didn't it?

Boom boom, acka-lacka-lacka boom!

Any more dinosaurs in your collection? (And no, I don't count Bob Dylan.) Specific dinosaurs would be welcome for next week.

My Top Ten Joan of Arc Songs

Who wouldn't burn themselves at the stake for Saint Joan? Here's ten artists paying fiery tribute...


Special mention to Joan Of Arc (the artist), perhaps most infamously known for A Tell-Tale Penis...



10. Clem Snide - Joan Jett of Arc

Linking perfectly to last week's post, Eef Barzelay's ode to a different kind of burning steak, with additional lyrical nods to Hall & Oates and John Mellencamp. More power to the puns!

9. Lene Lovich - Joan

Lene's Joan spends a little too much time listening to the voices in her head... but imagination is essential to creative art.

8. Grant Nicholas - Joan of Arc

Feeder's Grant Nicholas released his debut solo album last year and this is one of the stand out tracks. It has that same epic Feedery guitar sound, but a lot more beard.

7. Low - Joan of Arc

Joan of Arc will never save you now, claim everybody's favourite musical Mormons. But then, Joan of Arc never promised much...

6. Prefab Sprout - Green Isaac

I have to admit, Paddy, I've no idea what Green Isaac is all about... but I always love the way you spin those words together, like a little Shakespearian spider.

Oh, but to shine like Joan of Arc, you must be prepared to burn...

5. The Arcade Fire - Joan of Arc

Th'Arcade Fire take aim at their more zealous fans... like, chill out, guys, we're only a band... m'kay?

First they love you
Then they kill you
Then they love you again
And then they love you
Then they kill you
Then they love you again
Love love love you
Kill kill kill you...

4. Justin Currie - What Is Love For?

Another typically cynical and gloriously maudlin offering from Mr. C: a perfect ode to heartbroken bitterness.

What is love for?
Who does it help?
A one eyed king who leads everything straight into hell?

And what is love for?
What does it change?
Did Joan of Arc drag anyone back from history's flames?

And what does love do?
Does it favour a fortunate few?
Does it step on the hearts it can't use?
What does it do?

3. Leonard Cohen - Joan of Arc

Leonard's Joan gives herself to the flames both physically and metaphorically. An amazing, heartbreaking lyric.

2. Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark - Joan of Arc / Maid of Orleans

OMD score extra points for releasing two consecutive hit singles focused on the same historical character... has that ever been done at any other time in the annals of pop? Unfortunately, it's not quite enough to win them the top slot, not when they're up against this little belter...

1. The Smiths - Bigmouth Strikes Again

Well, it had to be, didn't it? "How could anybody possibly know how I feel?" Morrissey once famously asked, and yet could any other artist really know what it's like to be burned at the stake quite the way he has throughout his tortured career? (Insert winking smiley face.) Of course, Saint Morrissey's Joan was rather anachronistic, worried more about her melting Walkman and the smoke getting up her Roman nose than the fate of Orleans, but maybe that's why she had no right to take her place with the human race.



Which is your Maid of Orleans?