Who better to illustrate our TOP TEN MILLION SONGS than the Six Million Dollar Man himself? You know if they remade that today, he'd probably have to be a Six Billion Dollar Man? Six Million probably wouldn't even buy him a bionic leg.
Now onto the answers. Blame Lynchie if they were too hard this week. He said last week's were too easy!
10. Pow!
Take THAT!
I make no apologies for featuring Take That here. As boy bands go, they have at least three decent songs. Yes, Gary Barlow is a twonk, but Robbie makes up for that.
The version in my music library has brackets. I don't know why, because most of the time the title is just Guilty, no brackets. The Human Nature cover has brackets though, if you're interested. You shouldn't be, because it's awful.
1. He's pretty good at this quiz.
The gentleman above is Ken Sweeney. He was the lead singer of a band called... Brian!
(I did want this clue to involve Mrs. Brian, but that would have been too obvious.)
Join me again next week for more of the unknown snapshots that make Saturday such a star...
This one was inspired by The Swede who posted one of these tunes a few weeks back. I liked it so much, I thought I'd dig out nine more and toss them in the washing machine...
Joe wonders where his Mondays went, while trying to find someone else to do his chores...
I want a French maid, someone to wash my jeans Each quarter I've made is lost in washing machines I'm gonna change the world, I could be President If I could just work out where all my Mondays went
An answer song written as the male response to Leader of the Pack. I remember hearing Brian Matthews play this years ago. It's quirky and kitsch, but can't hold a candle to the original.
Let's get this one out of the way, shall we? The link above is to the full 8 minute version, which features dry ice, cocktails, bombast, writhing girls in short leather dresses with too much make-up, soulless boardrooms, big hair, shoulder pads, meaningful glances, wine bars, pig-headed shadowplay, Freudian tunnels, trenchcoats, bad dancing... and smug, millionaire Tories.
Truly, it's everything that was wrong with the 80s in one horrendous video.
Although it does contain the lyric...
Will you embrace His penis is reckless?
No, really, it does - have a listen! If you can bear it.
The Dirty Tricks department, Is working overtime. Trying to stop the candidate, From getting in this time. The wheels are now in motion, All the traps are set. Under the commotion, He'll walk into this net.
The state's intoxicated, They're at the starting gate. He may never make it, To the planned T.V. debate.
He can't fight off the big bucks, Of the old brigade. He's gotta watch his step, In this Smear Campaign.
They called a snap election, In the summer heat. This town is reeling backwards, Like a drunk man on the street.
Yeah....
Feed those lies, bend those minds, At any price. Foul or fair, as long as he's not in there, Election Time.
...while JWH finds temporary romantic solace in the arms of another loser.
I met you on election night As we cried over our beers Nothing you could do would cheer me up We broke up later that year How come you and I aren't winners? Why weren't we born the other side?
Better hear what they have to say 'Cause the tables just might turn against you, brother Set around Election Day Politics and hypocrites Is turning us all into lunatics
4. Radiohead - Electioneering I will stop, I will stop at nothing. Say the right things when electioneering I trust I can rely on your vote. When I go forwards you go backwards and somewhere we will meet. When I go forwards you go backwards and somewhere we will meet. Ha ha ha
If Alice Cooper had stood against Trump, it would have been a very different story.
1. Billy Bragg - Ideology
Yes, the final word obviously has to go to Billy...
When one voice rules the nation Just because they're on top of the pile Doesn't mean their vision is the clearest The voices of the people Are falling on deaf ears Our politicians all become careerists They must declare their interests But not their company cars Is there more to a seat in parliament Then sitting on your arse? And the best of all this bad bunch Are shouting to be heard Above the sound of ideologies clashing Outside the patient millions Who put them into power Expect a little more back for their taxes Like school books, beds in hospitals And peace in our bloody time All they get is old men grinding axes Who've built their private fortunes On the things they can rely The courts, the secret handshake The stock exchange and the old school tie For god and queen and country All things they justify Above the sound of ideologies clashing God bless the civil service The nation's saving grace While we expect democracy They're laughing in our face And although our cries get louder Their laughter gets louder still Above the sound of ideologies clashing
The listeners of Radio 2 recently voted Keane's Hopes & Fears(from which this song hails) as the second greatest album of all time... after Clocks by Coldplay and just ahead of Rio by Duran Duran.
From 28 years ago - when Glenn Tilbrook looked like David Coverdale, Chris Difford looked like Matt Smith and Jools Holland looked like... Jools Holland.
The last time I saw Richard was Detroit in '68, And he told me all romantics meet the same fate someday Cynical and drunk and boring someone in some dark cafe
Genius. And if that isn't proof enough, try this...
Richard got married to a figure skater And he bought her a dishwasher and a Coffee percolator And he drinks at home now most nights with the TV on And all the house lights left up bright I'm gonna blow this damn candle out I don't want nobody coming over to my table I got nothing to talk to anybody about All good dreamers pass this way some day Hiding behind bottles in dark cafes Dark cafes
1. The Rolling Stones - The Last Time
Inevitable, I know. But still great. Just listen to Jagger's swagger...
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