Snapshots #399: Drunk Songs (Volume 2)

Way back in December 2021, Snapshots #218 featured ten Drunk Songs. Today, I invite you to sample a few more beverages. I can't join you: I haven't had a drink since the 20th Century.

Please drink responsibly.

15. Pablo Escobar's last stand.

The War On Drugs - Wasted

14. Wild Cherry? Aha! 

Anagram!

Richard Hawley - Caned

13. Pricey set meets Suzanne in a diner. 

Alan Price Set meets Suzanne Vega in Tom's Diner.

Alan Vega - Hammered

12. Whatchu talkin' bout, Phil & Don / Luke & Matt?

Whatchu talkin' bout, Willis? And some brothers...

The Willis Brothers - Three Sheets In The Wind

11. 90s dance party at small suffixes.

A rave on ettes (ette being a suffix which means small).

The Raveonettes - Blitzed

10. White smoke, and it really changes a woman. 

"Changes a woman" was an anagram. White smoke announces a new Pope.

Shane MacGowan & The Popes - That Woman's Got Me Drinking

Look at the state he's in!

9. Rubber lips and the invisible rabbit.

Rubber lips is Mick Jagger. Harvey was the invisible rabbit.

Mick Harvey - Intoxicated Man

8. Flick a frightening switch in the Milky Way.

Galaxy featuring Phil Fearon - Dancing Tight

7. Like Mel's mate, but with a deeper voice.

Mel (Smith)'s mate was Griff Rhys (Jones). This guy is a bit more Gruff.

Gruff Rhys - People Are Pissed 

6. Randy & the Rainbows get stuck in a French room.

Randy & the Rainbows sang about Denise. A French room is la salle. 

Denise LaSalle - Under The Influence

5. On target.

The Arrows - A Touch Too Much

4. Hazy oboes: out of order.

"Hazy oboes" was an anagram. You might not know this guy, but this is one of Sam's favourite tunes at the moment. He's very popular with the young people. And actually quite listenable, unlike a lot of the stuff they dig.

Shaboozey - A Bar Song (Tipsy)

3. A mild day comes between Williams and Nick. 

Between Andy Williams and Nick Lowe, there is fair weather.

Andy Fairweather Low - Wide-Eyed & Legless

2. A Cooke, a Clark, a Fox, a Berry. 

Two Sams, two Daves.

Sam & Dave - I Can't Stand Up

1. They've got a Pedigree, like George and Andrew surrounded by sheep. 

Pedigree Chum meets baa Wham baa. Easy when you know how.

Chumbawamba - Tubthumpin'

He drinks a whiskey drink. He drinks a Vodka drink. He drinks a Lager drink. He drinks a cider drink. And he ends up pissin' the night away. Or 'issing the night away, if he's on Top of the Pops.

I'm giving you a week to sober up before the 400th edition of Snapshots.

Snapshots #335: A Top Ten Automatic Songs

Ten songs for Automatic camera lovers everywhere...

10. It's rude to do that, er, ladies.

It's rude to point... er...

The Pointer Sisters - Automatic

9. Bruce Willis Is A Ghost! (Plus seven.)

Spoilers!

Bruce Willis was a ghost in The Sixth Sense. Add 7 and you get...

Thirteen Senses - Automatic 

8. Leave! Do I have to tell you twice?

Go! Go!

The Go Gos - Automatic

7. Cuban drums.

The Bongos - Automatic Doors

6. Bridal armament needs unhooking.

"Bridal armament" was an anagram...

Miranda Lambert - Automatic

5. Suicidal star.

He was the main man in Suicide... and Vega is one of the brightest stars in the night sky.

Alan Vega - Automatic Terror

4. Stevie plays solo, without Paul.

Stevie Wonder and Paul McCartney sang Ebony & Ivory, about black and white living together in harmony on the piano keyboard. If Stevie were on his own, it'd just be...

The Black Keys - 10 A.M. Automatic

3. Sonja decked me for making a mess of this one.

"Sonja decked" was an anagram...

Dee D, Jackson - Automatic Lover

A hit in 1978, the same year as this...

2. Shakin' all over.

The Vibrators - Automatic Lover

1. Still the top, even after The Boss left.

In the Supremes, Diana Ross was the boss... until she left and Jean Terrell took her place in the top girl band of all time.

Manual transmission resumes next Saturday morning...

Hot 100 Countdown #83

Great 83 songs were thin on the ground, and about the only one I could find in my own record collection was this...

John Mayer - 83

I did quite like that back in 2001 - enough to swipe it from the chuck-out box, anyway - but listening back it all seems very polished and I don't particularly take to Mayer's voice anymore. Plus, Mayer appears to be a bit of a dick, having given some supremely dodgy interviews in his day. And obviously, I will not stand behind any artist who says stupid, inflammatory things in interviews.

The Swede dropped by to offer Magdalena 83 by Alan Vega - which I'm sure is pretty good since I do like a bit of Suicide every now and then... but as I couldn't find it anywhere on t'internet, and it doesn't (yet) feature in my record collection, I had to give it a pass.

Martin suggested Wafia - 83 Days, which to be fair he caveated with "don't like very much" (alongside John Mayer... which made me question the darker crevices of Martin's record collection as much as I sometimes do my own) but then he redeemed himself slightly by offering Major Tom (Coming Home) by German Bowie obsessive Peter Schilling. That doesn't actually mention 83 at all in title or lyrics, but Martin offered the following defence: "(a) it was used as the theme for the excellent Deutschland 83 and (b) is actually quite good", which would generally be enough for me... although I haven't seen the show myself.

The only other song I'm aware of with 83 in the title comes from the soundtrack of Flashdance... but it's hardly What A Feeling!

Irene Cara - Romance '83

All of which led me to search for lyrical references to the number 83, most of which revolved around the year... but rules are meant to be broken in times of desperation. So, here's My Top Ten 83 Songs... leading up to this week's winner:

10. Over The Rhine - Ohio

It was summertime in '83
We were burnin' out at the rubber tree
Wonderin' what in the world
Would make all this worthwhile
And if I knew then I was older then
Would I see regret to the last mile?

9. Ace Frehley & Frehley´s Comet - Rock Soldiers

They don't make 'em this Ace anymore.

It was back in the summer of '83
There's a reason I remember it well
I was slipping and sliding, drinkin' and drivin'
Bringin' me closer to Hell

And the Devil sat in the passenger's side
Of Delorean's automobile
He said, "Hey Frehley, Frehley let's not be silly
There's a life out there to steal!"

8. Hefner - Lee Remick

(Not the Go-Betweens song... in case you were wondering.)

I think it was in '83 my father left the family
But came back three weeks later

For a love both firm and stable

7. Marah - The Catfisherman

I got a couple of rods; they got tape where they broke
I got a bobber, some sinkers and two packs of smokes
I got the sun goin' down and the moon comin' out
And it's 83 degrees and I'm pissin' in the river

6. REM & Patti Smith - E-Bow The Letter

Will you live to 83?
Will you ever welcome me?
Will you show me something that nobody else has seen?

5. Guy Clark - A Nickel For The Fiddler

Well, it's a fiddler from Kentucky
Who swears he's 83
And he's fiddled every contest
From here to Cripple Creek
And it's old ones and it's young ones
And it's plain they half agreed
That it's country music in the park
As far as they can see

4. Dexys Midnight Runners - I Love You (Listen To This)

You were standing next to me,
In '82 and '83,
In all that time I barely proved I love you
Well there's nothing wrong but the wrong in me
You were everything you were meant to be

3. Drive-By Truckers - A World Of Hurt

And my good friend Paul was 83
When he told me that, "To love is to feel pain"
I thought about that a lot back then
I think about that again and again

2. Pulp - Last Days Of The Miner's Strike

Well my body sank below the ground
It became as black as night,
Overhead the sounds of horses hooves,
People fighting for their lives.
Some joker in a headband was still
Getting chicks for free.
And Big Brother was still watching you
Back in the days of '83.

1. Amy Rigby - The Summer of My Wasted Youth

Summertime in '83
I didn't need a j-o-b
Cause unemployment kept me free
To study country harmony
And find somebody with a car
Drink cheap beer in the Polish bar
Take photos in the photo booth
The summer of my wasted youth

So, lyrics will be allowed for 82... as will years. Unless you have an amazing title suggestion. These are the toughest numbers. They will get easier.