Monday, 29 May 2023
Celebrity Jukebox #90: Martin Amis
Sunday, 28 May 2023
Snapshots #294: A Top Ten Songs You'd Find In A Toolbox
Whose image could be more appropriate for a Top Ten songs about Tools than the voice of Buzz Lightyear, American comic Tim Allen? Not because he's a colossal tool... because he was the star of "hilarious" 90s sitcom Home Improvements. Of course...
10. What you'd call three J-Los.
A trinity of Lopez...
Trini Lopez - If I Had A Hammer
9. Alecia Moore Angry!
Alecia Moore is P!nk. These guys look pretty cross.
8. I'm Ezra Kelt, very confused.
"I'm Ezra Kelt" is an anagram for...
Mark Eitzel - Fresh Screwdriver
7. Sounds like a subtle, non-aggressive advertising campaign.
They're using the soft sell technique.
Look, you may not have a torch in your toolbox, but all the online guides recommend one. A lot of research goes into this feature, you know!
6. A Blur of Fruit Pastilles.
Fruit Pastilles are made by Rowntrees. Dave is from Blur, but was also a Labour councillor from 2017 - 2021, hence the tie.
5. Distant relatives of Phil, Joan and Lewis?
Phil Collins, Joan Collins and Lewis Collins might be distantly related to Ansell Collins... but not to Dave, whose surname is Barker.
Dave & Ansell Collins - Monkey Spanner
4. Might be hard men when they grow up...
...but they were just Soft Boys.
3. What the monks drink when there's a storm outside their house... and they're Making Plans for Ellie.
When there's a gale outside the abbey, the monks drink mead. We're making plans for Nigel and Ellie Goulding.
Abigail Mead & Nigel Goulding - Full Metal Jacket (I Wanna Be Your Drill Instructor)
2. Two men, a drum machine and (occasionally) a trumpet.
Ian and Will were the main Bunnymen, with their drum machine was called Echo... or was it? There's definitely a trumpet on this track though...
Echo & The Bunnymen - The Cutter
1. UFOs.
Get tooled up for more Snapshots next Saturday...
Saturday, 27 May 2023
Saturday Snapshots #294
Welcome to a Room with a View of ten pop celebrities. Identify them all and work out what connects their songs. None of them have anything to do with Helena Bonham Carter, but here she is holding a camera anyway...
10. What you'd call three J-Los.
9. Alecia Moore Angry!
8. I'm Ezra Kelt, very confused.
7. Sounds like a subtle, non-aggressive advertising campaign.
6. A Blur of Fruit Pastilles.
5. Distant relatives of Phil, Joan and Lewis?
4. Might be hard men when they grow up.
3. What the monks drink when there's a storm outside their house... and they're Making Plans for Ellie.
2. Two men, a drum machine and (occasionally) a trumpet.
1. UFOs.
View the answers tomorrow morning...
Friday, 26 May 2023
Celebrity Jukebox #89: Tina Turner
Thursday, 25 May 2023
Mid-Life Crisis Songs #93: Older Than Inspector Morse
As mentioned previously, I’ve been rewatching old episodes of Inspector Morse lately. John Thaw is still excellent, and I’ve discovered a fresh appreciation of Kevin Whately. It’s strange watching TV from the 80s though – the cameras are all fixed and rarely move, not even to pan across a room. The shots are long and slow and don’t cut between multiple angles in a scene. It’s made me realise just how fast-moving the direction is on modern TV and film, probably something to do with our rapidly-decreasing attention spans. That said, there’s something quite relaxing about the wonderfully languid pace of Morse, it’s perfect pre-bed TV, even if the exposition feels a little clunky in places due to the nature of Colin Dexter’s crossword-puzzle plotting. Those lengthy explanations work better in novels than they do on TV.
A horrific realisation smacked me in the face during the latest episode though. I’m midway through Series 2 at the moment, which I originally watched with my parents in 1988 when I was 16. Back then, Inspector Morse seemed a very (grumpy) old man to me… but actually, John Thaw was but a strip of a lad in the grand scheme of things. He was 46. Which means that I am currently five years older than Inspector Morse. This is more than my head can cope with.
Even harder to process is the death of Andy Rourke, aged just 59. I’ve no time for any obituaries that use Rourke’s death as a further excuse to cancel Morrissey; we should be able to respect the glory of The Smiths and all they meant to us without getting dragged into another debate on the latter day crimes of the lead singer. The thing about The Smiths is, they were far more than the sum of their parts. A chemical reaction occurred when Morrissey, Marr, Rourke and Joyce were together, elevating each band member far beyond their individual talents, creating true alchemy. Let's celebrate Rourke's life by remembering the good times...