Modern Life Is Rubbish #4: Teenage Lobotomy

We're having a training session tonight about the use of AI in education. Prior to that, I was sent a questionnaire probing my thoughts on the subject. The last question was, "What is one task you would like AI to help you with?" 

My answer?

"Making AI go away."

Gary Numan - Are 'Friends' Electric?

There was a big article in The Grauniad earlier this week in which academics relayed horror stories on the effect AI is already having on university education. You can read the whole thing, or if you can't handle the horror / your brain can't handle long-form information any more... here are a few choice quotes...

“I now talk about AI with my students not under the framework of cheating or academic honesty but in terms that are frankly existential,” said Dora Zhang, a literature professor at the University of California, Berkeley. “What is it doing to us as a species?”

Phoebe Bridgers - I Know The End

Michael Clune, a literature professor and novelist, said that, already, many students have been left “incapable of reading and analyzing, synthesizing data, all kinds of skills”. In a recent essay, he warned that colleges and universities rushing to embrace the technology were preparing to “self-lobotomize”.

The Ramones - Teenage Lobotomy

...several professors spoke about concerns that AI will exacerbate a widening divide in US higher education and that small numbers of elite students will have access to a more traditional, largely tech-free liberal arts education, while everyone else has a “degraded, soulless form of vocational training administered by AI instructors”.

REM - Losing My Religion

...when it comes to its impact on students, early studies point to potentially catastrophic effects on cognitive abilities and critical thinking skills.

Manic Street Preachers - Critical Thinking

I asked the AI Overlords, "How can we make AI go away?" and they responded with lots of suggestions about how to "reduce AI’s influence on daily life", "advocate for regulation" or "limit AI access to your data". 

Underneath all that, it added:

If you’re asking something deeper like:

“Can we stop the development of AI entirely?”

“Can society reverse the AI trend?”

…then the honest answer is: probably not, at least not completely. Once a technology is widespread globally, it behaves like the internet, electricity, or cars — we can regulate and restrict it, but we can’t make it disappear.

But you absolutely can control how much AI is part of your world, and even influence the broader conversation about its role in society.

So I'm writing this blog post. Because that's all I've got left.

People like to say that we're insane

But AI will reward us when it reigns

Pledge allegiance to the world's most powerful computer

Simulation: it's the future

What will it take to make you capitulate?

We appreciate power

We appreciate power

Elevate the human race, putting makeup on my face

We appreciate power

We appreciate power, power

Another Day #6: National No Smoking Day

IV and The Strange Band - Cigarette Ends

I think I've smoked about three cigarettes in my life, and each time was to impress a girl. The same girl. I suppose I kind of liked the buzz, but not enough (thankfully) to become addicted or have any desire to spend any of my own hard-earned cash on the things. How many fewer CDs would have I have been able to afford, if I'd developed a habit? How many comics would I not have been able to buy?

Arctic Monkeys - Cigarette Smoker Fiona

My dad smoked cigars when I was a kid, and I always loved the smell of them. As he got older, and had less money, he switched to a pipe and tobacco. I've probably mentioned this before, but one day in his early 60s, a doctor told him, "you keep smoking that pipe and you won't be here in ten years time". So my dad quit, cold turkey, and lived another 30 years... although arguably some damage had already been done, and he struggled with emphysema and other bronchial disorders, and (old age aside), those were probably what got him in the end.

Pink Floyd featuring Roy Harper - Have A Cigar

My Mum only smoked the occasional cigarette, at parties. Whenever I saw her with one in her hand, I became upset. I grew up watching some pretty graphic smoking ads on TV... from an early age, I was pretty well indoctrinated against fags... unless I thought I might use one to get a girl to like me.

Hawksley Workman - Jealous of Your Cigarette

It's hard to believe now just how much the smell of cigarette smoke used to be everywhere when we were teenagers... and how rare it is to smell them these days. It's all bloody vapes with the kids these days. Horrible things, with their claggy, artificial scents. Makes me feel a certain nostalgia for fag smoke... and definitely for cigars.

Tex Williams - Smoke! Smoke! Smoke! (That Cigarette)

Here are a few more songs about smoking... 

Squeeze - Cigarette of A Single Man

 

Bryan Ferry - Smoke Gets In Your Eyes

Nick Nicely - 49 Cigars

Hefner - The Hymn For The Cigarettes

Golden Earring - Smoking Cigarettes

Robert Fripp & Daryl Hall - You Burn Me Up Like A Cigarette

What about you? Are you a reformed smoker? Or still sneaking one down a dark alley when nobody's looking?

Namesakes #179: The Purple Gang

The web of lies tells me that, "The Purple Gang was Detroit’s most notorious organized crime gang in the 1920s and 1930s". But I prefer to think that so many different acts have chosen The Purple Gang as a band name not in tribute to those nefarious scallywags... but as a reference to one of the seminal rock 'n' roll hits...

Spider Murphy played the tenor saxophone
Little Joe was blowin' on the slide trombone
The drummer boy from Illinois went crash, boom, bang
The whole rhythm section was a Purple Gang

Whatever the reason, I was surprised how many Purple Gangs there have been...

THE PURPLE GANG #1

Once upon a time (well, around 1965 to be accurate) in Hollywood, we find a Purple Gang who began by playing gigs at gas stations, eventually landing a record contract and... well, that was about it, really. Keyboard player Harry Garfield went on to become a Senior Vice-President of Music at Universal in the 90s. Each member of the band wore one purple glove while performing. Not the same glove.

The Purple Gang - Bring Your Own Self Down

THE PURPLE GANG #2

Stockport band, produced by Joe Boyd, who enjoyed a certain notoriety in 1968 when their single Granny Takes A Trip was banned by the BBC. It didn't help that their lead singer, Pete Walker, delighted in the stage name "Lucifer". According to various sources, the controller of the BBC at the time remarked, “...a song with a dubious title designed to corrupt the nation’s youth – and a band that boasts a warlock for a singer will not be tolerated by any decent society.” John Peel, on the other hand, would later say that, “...Granny is one of the all-time great records.”

After enjoying a whiff of success in Bulgaria and Hungary with the single Sunset Over The Mersey (which I couldn't find on the tube of you), the band split up in the early 70s, only to reform in 1998 because that's what bands do.

The Purple Gang - Granny Takes A Trip

THE PURPLE GANG #3

Next up, some Aussie post-punks from 1984.

The Purple Gang - No Tranquilizers

PURPLE GANG #4

80s funk from Detroit, with a song that would no doubt get JK Rowling frothing at the mouth...

The Purple Gang - She's A He She

THE PURPLE GANG #5

Today's token umchicka-umchicka-umchicka nonsense from 1997.

The Purple Gang - Ghetto / Resolve

THE PURPLE GANG #6

Michigan-based guitar band comprising four 17 year olds when they started playing together in 1997. Their entry on the camp of bands says, "They were together for roughly 3 years, until they got tired of no one coming to their shows, and then they started new bands with similar results." I like them for their honesty.

The Purple Gang - Poster Art In Poland

PURPLE GANG #7

Detroit hip hop crew from the early 21st Century...

Purple Gang - Chips R Down

PURPLEGANG #8

Proper old-skool hip hop band from Pittsburgh in 2012. They got in here today by writing an eponymous tune.

PurpleGang - PurpleGang

THE PURPLE GANG #9

Well, at least these guys dressed for the occasion! Rap-rock crossover act from 2013, produced by the Insane Clown Posse, featuring Jumpsteady, Sugar Slam and Legz Diamond (he's the bloke in the middle).

Legz Diamond & The Purple Gang - Made Man

What - no Prince?

Which ones are royalty... and which ones leave you purple in the face?

The Enigma of CD87: Part 1

Thank you to everybody who chose a CD number for me to write about from the 174 I have created for our in-car entertainment since Sam was born. I will endeavour to look at each CD in turn, so we’ll start with Martin’s choice of CD87.

I’ve grown to enjoy this feature because it takes me back to the music blogging basics. And the randomness of it means I’ll write about things I might otherwise never get to comment on. I’ll try not to let the comments become too repetitive and find something interesting to say about all the songs that feature.

Let’s see how CD87 kicks off…

Track 1: Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers – Here Comes My Girl

Tom Petty crops up on these CDs with surprising frequency… or perhaps not surprising when you consider his songwriting philosophy of “"Don't bore us - get to the chorus!" Tom’s back catalogue of catchy FM rock songs are perfect for driving because they easily hook into the minds of casual listeners. But there’s a depth to his songwriting too, something that a lot of his peers can’t quite equal.

Here Comes My Girl was from the third Heartbreakers album, 1979’s Damn The Torpedoes, the one that really broke them in the US. Unlike the two singles that preceded it (Don’t Do Me Like That & Refugee), it didn’t crack the Top 40, but I guess it still racked up a lot of airplay at the time and kept the album in the public consciousness.

I like the fact that Petty talks / shouts the verses, then sings the chorus. It feels a bit bluesy in that – though iffypedia suggests he stole the idea from either Blondie or the Shangri-Las.

I didn’t get into Tom Petty until he released his first Greatest Hits compilation in 1993. Since then, he’s rarely been far from my speakers.

Track 2: The Manic Street Preachers - Australia

It might seem hard to believe now, but there was a time when the Manic Street Preachers were the biggest band in Britain. It started in '96 with the Everything Must Go album, which delivered four Top Ten hits in 1996. Australia was the last of these, but the fact that it still got to #7 in December (after 3rd single Kevin Carter only got to #9) shows that they were pretty much unstoppable back then. 

Of course, Oasis would soon eclipse them, but the fact that the Manics returned in '98 and went straight to Number One with the least radio-friendly track on the follow up (If You Tolerate This Your Children Will Be Next) showed they weren't about to be cowed by the Manc knuckle-draggers.

Were the Manics Britpop? They appeared on the same compilations, but always seemed one step removed. They didn't specialise in kitchen sink dramas or 60s throwbacks like most of the Britpop gang. Instead, they combined 6th form poetry with Guns 'n' Roses riffs... doesn't sound too appealing when you put it like that, does it? But they made it work. 

Apparently Australia was written shortly after the disappearance of Richey Edwards. The lyrics express Nicky Wire's desire to get as far away from the pain that came from that as he possibly could. As always, James Dean Bradfield took those words and made them transcendent. That's the power of a good frontman, and James is one of the best.

Track 3: Lloyd Cole - Perfect Skin

Here Comes My Girl was the 12th Tom Petty song to make it onto one of these compilations. Australia was the 8th song by the Manics. By contrast, Perfect Skin was only the third Lloyd Cole song to feature... this despite the fact that Lloyd is one of my absolute favourite artists. I'm not making these CDs for myself though, and I knew Lloyd was going to be a hard sell for an under 10. There's some out there who would accuse Lloyd of writing the same 6th Form poetry the Manics do... but Lloyd is getting consistent As in his Literature mocks, Nicky Wire is happy with the occasional B. In contrast though, Lloyd isn't all about the big singalong pop hooks that the Manics manage to effortlessly weave into their singles, so it's hard to find the tunes for an audience that isn't going to obsess over the lyrics like I will. 

Perfect Skin was the first Lloyd Cole single to make the charts, back in 1984. He never set those charts afire, never got close to the Top Ten, because he never really tried to write a pop song. He was always too cool to bother trying any of that. Those of us who love him, love him for that. And maybe despite that. A reviewer in Record Mirror at the time of Perfect Skin's release wrote, "If Lou Reed had ever sung the lyrics to a spaghetti western, this would have been exactly how he'd have done it." Lloyd, on the other hand, admitted to being obsessed by 'Subterranean Homesick Blues' at the time, and the wordplay clearly owes a sizable debt to Mr. Zimmerman...

I choose my friends only far too well

I'm up on the pavement

They're all down in the cellar

With their government grants and my IQ

They brought me down to size

Academia blues

More of CD87 soon.

Snapshots #438: Euphemisms For... S-E-X... Songs

This is Chubby Checker. In 2013, he was forced to sue a leading IT company for promoting an app that used his name as a euphemism for measuring the size of one's manhood. The app was withdrawn.

Here are 15 songs that could well be euphemisms for nookie.

15. Danced for Patrick Hernandez.

Before she became famous, she was a backing singer and dancer for the French disco star.

Madonna - Hanky Panky

14. Scotland bar vandal gets his comeuppance.

"Scotland bar vandal" was an anagram.

Starland Vocal Band - Afternoon Delight

If you've never seen the video before, I urge you to give it a click. These days, we're so used to seeing pop stars singing about sex... but these guys look so wholesome, surely they were waiting till they were married?

13. Dustbin Wagon Americano.

Dustin Wagons are made by Dennis. An Americano is a coffee.

Dennis Coffey - Congress Six

12. Slow horse is such a sweetie.

Have you watched Slow Horses yet? If not, you don't know what you're missing. Gary Oldman plays Jackson Lamb... and he's luscious!

Luscious Jackson - Deep Shag

That might be a song about carpets. I'm not sure.

11. That time Elton came back and stayed.

(Elton) John and Paul Young, who sang Come Back And Stay.

John Paul Young - I Wanna Do It With You

10. Droopy-nosed flock.

Flight of the Conchords - Business Time

9. Live with Mr. Las Vegas, on the loo.

Liv' is short for Olivia. Mr. Las Vegas was Wayne Newton. A loo is a John.

Olivia Newton-John - Physical

8. We're all lost inside Grampa's Telstar obsession. 

Grampa's Telstar obsession

The Pastels - Ride

7. Needs an A to boogie.

DNCE - Cake By The Ocean

That's what the young people are calling it these days, apparently.

6. Sounds like a video game, second prize on the Golden Shot.

The video game would be Sega. Second prize on the Golden Shot might be the Silver Bullet.

Bob Seger & The Silver Bullet Band - Night Moves 

Worth watching that video for an early appearance by Joey from Friends.

Or, a little less subtle...

Bob Seger & The Silver Bullet Band - The Horizontal Bop

5. Rebel Without A Chris.

James Dean was a Rebel Without A Cause. Chris Martin, without the Chris, would be...

Dean Martin - Wham! Bam! Thank You, Ma'am!

4. Nike, round the bend.

Nike Air, but curved.

Curved Air - Screw

3. Wayne.

Rooney - Jump In My Bed

2. Found washed up on Liberty Shores.

"Liberty Shores" was an anagram.

Isley Brothers - Between The Sheets

1. Henry, Wendy, Skip.

Henry James, Wendy James, Skip James.

James - Laid

Get your minds out of the gutter next Saturday morning for something far more wholesome.