Cnut Songs #28: The Youth Of Today

Continuing this week's theme of stealing content from the past (because it's Half Term and I'm lazy), here's something I posted on the book of faces in 2016, when I was teaching at The Bad Place. I guess I didn't post it here because back then , all I pretty much did on this blog was write about music... 

Squire - The Face Of Youth Today

A recent conversation with a student highlights the problem with the yoof of today...

Me: JK Rowling took a lot of her ideas for Harry Potter from Lord of the Rings...

Student: Yeah, but Harry Potter is much better than Lord of the Rings.

Me: Why's that?

Student: Harry Potter has his own theme park.

Me: Oh, so that's how we judge the worth of a story, the "greatness" of literature, is it? If they give them their own theme park?

Student: Yeah - I mean, who else can you name who has their own theme park?

Me: Mickey Mouse... Truly one of the greats of literature. After all, it was William Shakespeare himself who created Mickey Mouse.

Student: Did he???

Young Galaxy - Youth Is Wasted On The Young

Worse still, when relating this story to others in the staff room, a teaching assistant in her early 20s immediately responded: "Did he? I didn't know that."

Amy MacDonald - Youth Of Today

All of which brings me to my theory about what's wrong with the yoof of today. They have no cultural awareness beyond their own lifetime...even beyond the last couple of years in most cases. This is the fault of the internet and 57 channels of TV. When we were kids, we 3/4 channels, we watched whatever was on. Which often was old stuff made long before we were born. And we were happy with that. And it made us aware of cultural history. By the time I was 16 (the age of the above student) I was well-versed in Hitchcock, Bogart, 50s sci fi, Orson Welles, Universal horror films of the 40s, Hammer, Clint Eastwood et al. On top of all the stuff I grew up with (Star Wars, Back to the Future, Ferris Bueller). Nowadays, you can comfortably watch E4 all day and never see anything older than Friends. And why would you ever watch something in black and white? 

River City People - When I Was Young

Which leads me to another conversation I had with another 16 year old recently...

Me: What's your favourite film?

Student: Magic Mike 2.

Me: Really. And why do you like that?

Student: Dunno.

Me: Well, why the sequel? What makes Magic Mike 2 better than the original Magic Mike?

Student: It's newer.

Musical Youth - Pass The Dutchie

It's worth pointing out that when I originally posted this 8 years ago, a couple of people who've known me for a long time and who are similar ages to me suggested that I wasn't typical of the average 80s teen in the way I reached back to old black and white movies, that many of my contemporaries just watched new stuff back then and never looked back at all. I wonder if you'd agree?

My Top Ten 'Being In A Band' Songs

Dipping my toe tentatively into Top Tens again, lest this blog get done under the Trade Descriptions Act. One of the main reasons I quit was because I always ended up with too many options for whatever topic I picked and I hated leaving anything out. So I'm just going to go with the first ten songs I think of and call this Volume 1 of Songs About Being In A Band. When I think of more, or you do, I might run a second post.

Oh, and in case you were wondering, I did think of The Moody Blues - I'm Just A Singer In A Rock 'n' Roll Band, but then I listened to it again and decided it was actually rubbish.



10. Frank Hamilton - We Started A Band

It's a metaphor for a bad relationship. Aren't they all!

It feels like we started a band

But it didn't work out

Didn't work out how we planned

There's a tear in my eye

And maybe our songs were no good

Or maybe we just fought too much

9. Boston - Rock 'n' Roll Band

Much better than The Moody Blues.

Well, we were just another band out of Boston

On the road and tryin' to make ends meet

Playin' all the bars, sleepin' in our cars

And we practiced right on out in the street

No, we didn't have much money

We barely made enough to survive

But when we got up on stage and got ready to play, people came alive

8. Amy MacDonald - Let's Start A Band

It's not just the lads who want to do it.

Give me a stage and I'll be your rock and roll queen

Your 20th century cover of a magazine

Rolling Stones here I come, watch out everyone, I'm singing

I'm singing my song

Give me a festival and I'll be your Glastonbury star

The lights are shining everyone knows who you are

Singing songs about dreams about hopes about schemes

Oh, they just came true

7.  Grand Funk Railroad - We're An American Band

Yes they were.

Booze and ladies, keep me right

As long as we can make it to the show tonight

6. Del Amitri - Drunk In A Band

More grim honesty from Mr. Currie.

Danny puts the cones on the motorway

And Donna dances tables in her lingere

And Jerry, Dave, and Billy, man, they're putting on a play

But I'm just a drunk in a band

5. Creedence Clearwater Revival - Travelin' Band

Listen to the radio,

Talkin' 'bout the last show.

Someone got excited,

Had to call the state militia.

I wanna move.

Playin' in a travelin' band, yeah!

4. Albert Hammond - Free Electric Band

Well, they used to sit and speculate upon their son's career,

A lawyer or a doctor or a civil engineer,

Just give me bread and water, put a guitar in my hand,

'Cause all I need is music and the free electric band

I don't suppose Albert had much to say about his own son's choice of career...

3. Jason Isbell - To A Band That I Loved

I always thought this was about his years as a member of the Drive By Truckers, but the interweb tells me he actually wrote about a band they went on tour with called Centro-Matic.

Though everyone tried to ignore us

We'd scared them all off by the chorus

2. Felt - Ballad of the Band

The downside of being in a band... and not doing as well as you'd hoped.

It's all my fault

Yes I'm to blame

Ain't got no money

Ain't got no fame

1. Art Brut - Formed A Band

Surely the most joyous expression of what it must be like to start your own band after dreaming about it for so long. I can never understand why Art Brut weren't bigger than The Beatles. (Please don't answer that.)

And yes, that is his singing voice. It's not irony, and it's not rock 'n' roll... he's just talking... to the kids.

My Top Ten Songs About David Bowie

So, there's a new album out from The Dame. And from what I've heard of it (admittedly only the first two singles so far: the album's still in the post), it sounds pretty spiffy. Since I already did My Top Ten Bowie Songs... here's some other people paying tribute.


10. Liam Lynch - Fake David Bowie Song

I've been stuck in space for such a long time
Sorry mum, I'm 5 years late for tea time

One of many fake songs Liam recorded, from the album of the same name... sadly, this one ends far too soon.

9. The Very Sexuals - Bowie Eyes

I always took Bowie's eyes to be the clearest evidence that he was, in fact, not of this earth.

And I want a star that guides me
To a girl with Bowie eyes
Got visions of my glamrock idols saving me

8. The Flaming Lips with Neon Indian -  Is David Bowie Dying?

The end of the universe, the death rays of the sun, with Wayne Coyne channeling the ghost of Bowie, the last man in existence.

Or something. 

7. Phish - David Bowie

An 11 minute jam, the only lyrics being repeated mentions of "David Bowie"... and, erm, "UB40".

Look, don't hold your breath waiting for my Top Ten Songs About UB40, OK?

6. Tori Amos - Not David Bowie

There's an underlying bitterness to this lyric that appeals to me. Tori's boyfriend blames her for the fact he's never made anything of his life, so she hits back...

...but I am not the reason you are not David Bowie...

5. They Might Be Giants - Au Contraire

David Bowie came to town
Flying overhead
"Don't you dig my chops?" he cried
This is what they said...

Au contraire, Dave
Quite the opposite, in fact
As it happens, au contraire
Au contraire, mon frère

Yeah. It makes as much sense as anything else TMBG ever recorded. Still ace.

4. Amy MacDonald - Barrowland Ballroom 

Amy's tribute to a legendary Scottish music venue... wishing she saw The Laughing Gnome there.

And when the night turns to day
And the lights they fade away
I wish that life and love would pass me by
And when the band stops a song because there's something going on
Well there is magic in the air I swear.
And I wish that I saw Bowie, playing on that stage
I wish that I saw something, to make me come of age.

3. Veruca Salt - With David Bowie

Extra marks for naming your band after a character from Charlie & The Chocolate Factory.

I'm never alone
Cause you're following me home
I'm falling in love
My walkman and me
With David Bowie

2. Rolling Stones - Angie

Enough people believe this is about Dave's first missus that it merits inclusion. Plus, it's a great song. And no Mars Bars were hurt during the recording of this track. That's just apocryphal.


1. Flight of the Conchords - Bowie

A tribute and pastiche in one, though no other record on this list does justice to the unique insanity of the "freaky old bastard" behind Major Tom, Ziggy Stardust and the Thin White Duke... I like to think he'd approve.

Do you have one really funky sequined space suit, Bowie,
Or do you have several ch-changes?

Got any about-Bowie songs you want to share with the class?