Snapshots #427: Songs About Christmas Presents

For our seasonal edition, we asked some of our favourite pop stars (and Bono - well, it is the season of good will) what they wanted for Christmas. Here are their replies... might give you some ideas for last minute Christmas shopping!

25. Found disrupted in one ugly... bloke.

"In one ugly" was an anagram.

Neil wants a Transformer, man.

Neil Young – Transformer Man

24. Sounds like we’re both in the same boat.

You too?

Bono wants a kite. Hope it doesn't get caught in any pylons.

U2 - Kite

23. The heavenly nouveau riche.

I did have to google synonyms for Upstarts.

Angelic Upstarts – Action Man

22. The Royal Airforce, For Instance.

RAF, FI.

Raffi – Old Toy Trains

21. Sassenachs.

Bad English – Rockin’ Horse

20. Robins in an American garden.

The Yardbirds – Puzzles

19. Leave Nelson unplanted.

Admiral Fallow - Subbuteo

18. Fusion combo.

The Mixtures - The Pushbike Song

17. Wings that sting.

Macca-bees.

The Maccabees – Lego

16. Your plans to buy a Prince album are cancelled due to bad weather.

It's going to rain on your copy of Parade.

The Rain Parade - Kaleidoscope

15. Watch out - these fellas scam you!

"Fellas scam" was an anagram. There's an uncredited PP Arnold on this song too...

Small Faces - Tin Soldier

14. You’ll find them in the next church you visit.

In the next church you visit.

XTC – Spinning Top

13. Tutankhamun stuck on a Swiss mountain.

The Mönch is a mountain in Switzerland.

Pharoahe Monch - Simon Says

12. Home to the Basement Tapes.

Bob Dylan & The Band recorded The Basement Tapes in The Big Pink.

The Big Pink - Dominos

11. Favoured by Constable, Monet and O’Keeffe.

They all liked to paint landscapes.

Landscape – Doll’s House

10. Sounds like the connection between a misty streaker and a spooky train robber.

Ray Stevens sang Misty. Ray Parker Jr. sang about a Ghost Buster. The link sounds like Ray.

Link Wray – Slinky!

9. Ensemble brought in by Coldplay and Pilot Olivia to perform their songs.

Coldplay sang Yellow. Olivia and Pilot both sang Magic.

Yellow Magic Orchestra – Computer Game

8. What an Amazonian… or, um, his offspring… might spend their money on.

Jeff (Bezos)... and, er... son... likes a nice starship.

Jefferson Starship – Skateboard

7. Moonlight Maddie meets a Kung Fu Fighter.

In Moonlighting, Cybil Shepherd played Maddie Hates. Carl Douglas was a kung fu fighter.

Hayes Carll - (KMAG) YOYO

6. Scared by the fireplace bogeyman? Find solace within.

Fireplace bogeyman.

Placebo – Plasticine

5. Plug in hedge trimmer.

The Electric Prunes – Wind-Up Toys

4. Phoney rappers are non-returnable protagonists.

The Disposable Heroes Of Hiphoprisy – Water Pistol Man

3. Caveman, Haddock, Kirk… they’re an unhappy bunch!

My Sad Captains - Building Blocks
 

2. Theme park owner.

Dollywood!

Dolly Parton – Backwoods Barbie

Presumably you need a Redneck Ken to go with that.

1. Skinks on a plane.

What we all really want for Christmas!

1. The Flying Lizards - Money 

Hopefully that will give you all some ideas for last minute gifts.

Have a good one.

More of this nonsense after Boxing Day.

Snapshots #281: A Top Ten Banana Songs

Ten songs to send you completely bananas on a Sunday morning... I left out The Banana Boat Song only because it seemed too obvious, and Harry featured here just a couple of weeks back.

10. The right bloke finds a special place in Samantha and Amanda's heart.

There's a man inside both their names.

Man - Bananas

9. In betweeners.

Ween is hidden inside Betweeners.

Ween - Bananas & Blow

8. Jobson investigates Tom's accent and George's band.

Richard Jobson was in The Skids. Tom Petty had a Southern Accent. Boy George's band was Culture Club.

Southern Culture On The Skids - Banana Puddin'

7. Points for Sweet Talking.

A Sweet Talking Guy gets loads of marks.

Guy Marks - Loving You Has Made Me Bananas

It gave me a great deal of joy to hear that again after so many years.

6. Robert got the blues in a box.

Robert Johnson had the blues. Jack in a box.

Jack Johnson - Banana Pancakes

5. Connects Mary to a Carpenter.

Mary Chapin Carpenter. You could also have Harry Carpenter to complete...

Harry Chapin - Thirty Thousand Pounds of Bananas

4. Regular jolts.

Prunes keep you regular. Electricity gives you jolts.

The Electric Prunes - The Great Banana Hoax

3. Attenborough, Davies, Bird.

They're all Dickies.

The Dickies - Banana Splits

2. Anton.

Christopher Anton Rea...

Chris Rea - God's Great Banana Skin

1. Nomad on narcissistic crusade hides answer within.

NoMAD ON NArcissistic crusade.

Madonna - I'm Going Bananas

Keep your eyes peeled for more Snapshots next Saturday.

My Top Ten Songs About Last Night

What were you doing last night?

I was listening to these fine songs...


10. Todd Snider - Late Last Night

Try to keep it down, Todd was up kind of late last night.

9. Johnny Cash - Last Night I Had The Strangest Dream

Much as I like Simon & Garfunkel, their version comes off sounding slightly twee next to the Man In Black's majestic cover.

8. Green Day - Last Night On Earth

The kind of ballad they'd never have written before they started selling out stadiums. But even the punkiest of bands can't resist getting people to wave their lighters sometimes.

7. The Hold Steady - Chicago Seemed Tired Last Night

We mix our own mythologies, we push them out through PA systems
We dictate our doxologies and try to get sleeping kids to sit up and listen
And I'm not saying we could save you, but we could put you in a place where you could save yourself
If you don't get born again at least you'll get high as hell

Don't worry, I had to look up "doxologies" too.

6. Frank Sinatra - Last Night, When We Were Young

Quietly heartbreaking, as only Frank could do it.

5. Duke Special - Last Night I Nearly Died

...but it's OK. Duke woke up just in time.

4. Lead Belly - Where Did You Sleep Last Night?

Recorded in 1944. Covered by Kurt Cobain in the early 90s who called Lead Belly "my favourite performer".

Lead Belly died in 1949, before rock 'n' roll was even born. You wouldn't know it. 

3. The Strokes - Last Nite

They almost missed out. That's where poor spelling gets you, lads.

From their first album, still their best.

2. The Electric Prunes - I Had Too Much To Dream Last Night

A monumental slab of 60s psychedelia.

Trivia fact: Kenny 'Footloose' Loggins was a member of the Electric Prunes for a short time, though not when this record was recorded.

1. The Smiths - Last Night I Dreamt That Somebody Loved Me

As I've said before, they can't always be Number One... but I'll be damned if there's a better song out there with "last night" in the title. 


Which one will you still be listening to tomorrow night?