Yesterday we had a picture of John Lydon at the top of the page because I thought he was surely the best / worst example of a pop star appearing in an advert. And then I discovered Snoop Dogg in the Money Supermarket ad. And John had some competition.
Here is George's choice of the best "pop" "songs" used in adverts... although George would like to qualify that, "I think the link is best described as “songs related to UK adverts”, as some of the songs were not actually used but were the basis for the advert. For example, “Que Será Será”, because I’m 100% sure Doris Day did not sing about mushrooms and fried onion rings."
We hope it's chips, it's chips, we hope it's chips...
1. Confused band, ft. Lelah.
"ft. Lelah" was an anagram for one of George's favourite groups...
The Fall - Touch Sensitive (Vauxhall Corsa)
Thanks again to George for suggesting this week's songs. As someone who worked in advertising for far too many years, I couldn't have done this one myself.
Another Thursday, another Guest Post. And we welcome back George, who's getting all mushy on us...
George's Top Ten Heart Songs
Rol made the huge mistake of saying I would be welcome to do
another piece for his blog.
And I have chosen My Top Ten Heart songs so I could shoehorn
in one of My Favourite Songs Of All Time, brought to me by Andy Kershaw many
many years ago. I was thinking originally of a Top Ten Meal songs but that led
to me that huge pile of old pish Breakfast In America, which would never ever
be included in such a list but I had to banish that song from my mind. And
instead we have this top ten. Spoiler alert: No Supertramp. Actually, that’s hardly
a spoiler, but hopefully you get the point.
That’s a picture of a cow’s heart. Something I have cooked up for the dogs and cats, who could not scoff it quickly enough. When I told Talho Jorge that I was vegetarian it caused great amusement. We used to get a great slab of heart-and-lung (different butcher) which I just could not deal with. Enough of this offal talk. On with the music:
A Top Ten Heart Songs has to have this in it. Peerless. Well, almost.
(George has now redeemed himself for dissing Ms. Tyler & Mr. Steinman. That is one of my all time favourite songs, as featured here many times before. - Rol.)
I was something of a Hendrix obsessive in my youth, amassing 26 albums by the age of 19. This is from the Royal Albert concert of 1969, on the same day as Denis Law’s 29th birthday:
It’s amazing how clean that guitar sounds, and how all you need for a fantastic blues song are three people. No embellishments, just Hendrix playing the blues, bass and drums.
There might be one or two people reading who don’t actually
own Feast Of Wire. You really should catch yourselves on and rectify that right
now. It is frequently considered The Best Album Ever Made In The Entirety of Recorded
Music. That title has also been bestowed upon ABC, Rod Stewart, and The
Turbines. At the momentum it belongs again to Calexico. And this song replaced
a Clyde McPhatter and The Drifters song, THAT is how good it is:, it’s the
slow, sweeping orchestration, the almost tortured painful vocal, it’s a
glorious and dark, dark song...
It’s after this track that the realisation dawns that the entire album is something special.
Now for some, this song might have been rather spoiled by the bloody ghastly ITV programme of a few years ago, but listen to it now, it’s a fantastic, simple love song, beautifully played and sung, 2 minutes and 7 seconds of pure pop perfection. Come on, who amongst you will not sing the “piddle dee pat” bits. And the rest of it???
This song is from the completely over the top and self-indulgent double album Wheels of Fire album (one track involves an especially tedious Ginger Baker drum solo), but this a great psychedelic/rock song, showing what a great vocalist Jack Bruce was, really powerful, there’s no unending guitar noodling from Clapton, just a brief interlude, and those huge thumping drums of Ginger Baker.
I love how that song seems to begin with Jack Bruce launching into the vocal and Clapton and Baker are almost caught unawares.
I was thinking about not including this, because the singer appeared in my previous outing here. I played it again and thought that if this is to be a Top Ten and not just Ten Songs with Heart In The Title, then it would be ridiculous to exclude it.
(Agreed. - Rol.)
It’s a tremendous song, but remarkably not his best! Another song that can move me to tears. If you don’t like this, you’ve got no heart...
And here’s the shoehorn - I jettisoned the Top Ten Meals Songs idea for the rather easier Heart Songs just so I could include this song. Well, it has been one of my (and I suspect Charity Chic’s) Favourite Songs Of All Time since first heard 30 or so years ago. Like the Dwight song above (OK, I know that’s a cover) I can sing along, or “sing” along, to this word-perfectly. Almost word-perfectly. It’s meant to be sad but it always makes me smile, the cheery music just does not go with the sentiment of the song. Now THIS is a peerless song...
Two minutes and 50 seconds of country music genius. You’ll not hear a better song today.
“I opened up my sack, and lord there it was, my baby’s goodbye note, heartaches for lunch”
“Teardrops change the flavour of things I loved once”
Where else but in country music do you get such great lines??
So, no Jayhawks (Two Hearts) which was briefly a contender. No Joy Division (very very briefly a contender, but not as strong as The Jayhawks). No Bruce Springsteen, obviously.
There might, just possibly, be something that I missed, but looking at the list the only tracks that could possibly be replaced are the Neil Young and Cream songs, the others are nailed on surefire bets for being in any Top Ten Heart Songs.
And thanks to Rol for allowing me again to pollute his pages.
No, thank you, George. For anyone who's interested, I did a Top Ten Breakfast Menu Songs back in 2013... and promised I would include Supertramp in a future Top Ten that never materialised. One day, Supertramp fans, one day. Now I never even thought of tackling a Top Ten Heart Songs because there are so many available options. George did nail a couple of my favourites above... but if he missed out any of yours, feel free to contribute a list of your own for a future instalment of Guest Post Thursday.
36 comments and counting from last week, as I begin to type this up. To be fair though, most of them were from George, who doesn't even like this series. Here's his first suggestion...
John Lennon had a really truly awful single in the mid 70s called Number nine dream. Don't include that in your list.
I've got to say, I'm with George on that though: that is bloody awful. Don't watch the video either, unless you want to catch Yoko Ono in leather hotpants. I'm sorry, but I'm siding with Paul on this one.
At least the REM version doesn't have Yoko in it. Or her hotpants.
Whenever I heard the name Meat Puppets, I expect them to be some kind of industrial metal / goth band... not a million miles from Nine Inch Nails. I never fail to be amazed by how they actually sound.
Now much as I like the idea of torturing George, I'm afraid I have to agree with him again on this. Which makes twice in the same week. I am now officially worried for my mental health.
And the perfect lyrical opener for next weeks column... says Rigid Digit.
Trust me, I listened to the opening lyrics... and I couldn't make head or tail of them.
Welcome back, my friends
To the show that never ends
We're so glad you could attend
Come inside! Come inside
Really? Is that what he was singing? Why can't he enunciate? He was so much nicer when he was singing about Father Christmas.
Speaking of properly enunciating: back to The Swede's list...
I think this was The Swede's last suggestion this week. I don't think I missed any out...
The Studio One Band - Nine Pence
Can't find that last one anywhere on t'internet, but I'm sure it's a belter. It's got to be better than John Lennon and ELP anyway. Eh, George? Go on, old pal, it's you and me against the world this week. What else have you got for me?
Of course it does... just listen to that intro too! Blimey. Makes me want to do high kicks. I've got half a mind to let you take over this feature, George.
Yes, Revolution 9 is a perfect example of why the Beatles had to split up. Weird, really, since the same title (minus the 9) produced one of my all time favourite Beatles songs.
Wow, Rol, your Hot 100s are getting longer and longer, says C. I suspect this trend is set to continue for a few more weeks...
What doesn't kill you just makes you stronger, C. As we're all supposed to be discovering at the moment. I'll go with 'Nine Plan Failed' by Adam & The Ants from his arty Dirk Wears White Sox days.
That's a good one! says Lynchie. And it is too. I've been listening to quite a bit of Dave Alvin lately - his voice is a great comfort. But I didn't know that one, so thank you.
Marie (can't link to you this week, Marie, your blog has disappeared again) sided with George on the Nine Pound Hammer, also suggesting this version...
This post reminds me of one of the most epic of epic Chain posts over at Jez's place.
One of my inspirations.
Talking of The Chain he used to have a Worst Record of the Week award so I'm going to nominate song Nine Million Bicycles by Katie Melua. She has a sweet voice and looks stunning but those Mike Batt lyrics drove me mad and I wrote about them over at my place.
Alyson then goes on to explain in detail her issue with this song, but she forbids me from reposting it here (even though it might have helped me beat Jez's record for longest blog post ever). You can read her cutting analysis here though.
Then Lynchie joined in with his own analysis of the Beijing bikes issue:
Fair point about those alleged 9 million bicycles in Beijing, Alyson. As you suggest - it was closer to 9 and a half million back in 2005 when the Katie Melua song was released. But, bicycle use in Beijing has dropped from about 60 percent in 1986 to 17 percent in 2010. At the same time, car use has grown 15 percent a year for the last ten years. (Note - these statistics come from a study of cycling in Beijing conducted by Jinhua Zhao, an urban planning professor at the University of British Columbia. You can find more about the De-Bikification of Beijing here.
I have to admit, I quite like that song though, despite all your objections. My biggest problem is with the video - she's going to ruin that lovely jacket. What a shame.
I bet George is a big Katie Melua fan too. Speaking of George, here's one final suggestion from my new co-writer this week...
With all the suggestions above, I hesitate to add to your sifting burden frivolously. But I have always tried to inject a small Canadian element to your rundown, and though Bryan Adams has been listed already, I feel Canada deserves a more fair and balanced representation than just that one...song. So my musings have turned up a short 1 minute exuberant little ditty I hope you will accept, "Song Nein", by Gunnarola. Its lyrics, though nonsensical, are certainly no moreso than "Song 2" by Blur, which surely must feature prominently in a few weeks time. My favourite lyric is the line "Ich habe Sauerkraut in meinen Lederhosen!" And before you look at the Teutonic spelling in the title and cry "Nyet!", I suggest he certainly intends at least a pun on the Nummer Neun, as indeed it comes in its due and proper sequence following numbers einz and zwei all the way through to seven and eight. For those interested, Gunnarola is a young Youtube artist from London (not of course in England, wherein the Queen lives, but London, Ontario, a gritty industrial town a couple hours west of where I live). He reached his pinnacle of popularity in 2009 with his song "Canadian, Please", which elicited 5 million views for its saucy lyrics extolling the virtues of life in Canada.
I think it's fair to say Mike Nesmith has a more respectable post-Monkees career than either Lennon or McCartney, post-Beatles. Ooh, little bit of controversy there.
That's rather lovely too. But I had to hold off on spending any more money for the moment.
I'm going to miss this series.
Well, that makes one of us, Brian. I do have an idea for what'll replace it though. Hopefully something that doesn't offer up quite so many potential songs every week...
And finally this week, it's over to Jim in Dubai...
Not much left this week but here's what i can add.
Y'know what, Jim? When you suggested that, I shuddered slightly. Then I listened to it again and... bloody hell, you're right. I'd forgotten what a fine pop song that was.
However, I have to hand it to The Swede again this week, for being the first to suggest what he called "surely a massive contender". Because, yes, it was.
Even before The Temptations start singing, this was the winner...
This is the delightful Audrey Tautou, star of Amelie. Think up your own puns, I'm too tired.
Here are this week's answers...
10. Civil war soldiers refuse to sleep.
"The New Model Army of England was formed in 1645 by the Parliamentarians in the English Civil War." I'm ashamed to say I don't know much about history, but I read about these guys in one of Sam's books.
