Nearly finished going through the tracks on Sam's favourite in-car CD... and as my new car doesn't have a CD player, I'm wondering if we'll ever listen to this again...
Track 17: George Michael - Outside
I'd lost touch with George Michael by the mid-90s, swept away from pop music in the surge of Britpop. So I only really revisited his late-90s output once I'd grown up and realised pop music wasn't so bad after all.
Outside was famous as the record in which George took a scandal from his private life, grabbed it with both hands, and made a top pop tune (and video) which resolutely stuck two fingers up at the tabloid press that was hounding him.
It's wonderful.
Track 18: Idlewild - You Held The World In Your Arms
Was this a football anthem? It sounds like one... only better than most of them. Their only top ten hit, although I'd been following Idlewild since the early days. It's not my favourite, but I loved the big wide-screen stab at glory that this album represented, just as much as I'd loved the more esoteric art-rock of When I Argue I See Shapes three years earlier.
I think Sam likes this one because it definitely sounds like a football anthem...
Track 19: White Plains - My Baby Loves Lovin'
Just to prove that you can't beat a cheesy late-60s pop hit... here's one that never grows old.
If you'd asked me yesterday, I'd have guessed that White Plains were from the USA - not that they were an off-shoot of the Flowerpot Men. Then again, where did the Flowerpot Men want to go? They were obviously Americaphiles. A Greenaway & Cooke production, so it was always going to sound a cut above... although there is some debate about who's actually singing. Some liner notes, quoted on iffypedia, reveal...
"Contrary to popular myth, we are assured that the lead vocals were performed by Ricky Wolff, with Tony Burrows doubling him on the chorus". But "due to Wolff's unavailability to promote the record, it would be singer-songwriter Roger Greenaway who appeared as the main lead singer on the promotional material and TV performances."
Bands were weird in the 60s. I love this video though...
(Technically speaking, the monkey nut, aka the peanut, is not actually a nut. It's a legume. But I couldn't find any decent Cashew songs, so it sneaked it, just pushing out Harry Nilsson's Coconut, which is a fruit.)
(And yes, hazelnuts only have one L. But this Hazell was a TV detective, for whom Maggie sang the theme tune. And it's a cracking tune, so it was shoe-horned in.)
1. Tyts.
Tits would be birds. What else were you thinking of...?
The Byrds - Chestnut Mare
Snapshots will be back next Saturday. You'd be nuts to miss it!
Those of you who have been subjecting yourself to this nonsense for far too long will recall that during lockdown, one of the things that really helped me through was the conversations I had via Whatsapp with my former colleague and good friend, Ben. I shared many of those conversations here, as I felt they might on occasion prove entertaining to others, and also because it saved me having to come up with an idea for a post that day. I don't share our conversations so much anymore, not because Ben and I aren't still communicating, but because mostly we just talk about stuff that won't be of much interest to you guys. However, I wanted to share the following chat because it gave this series - and my "journey" (I hate using that word in this context) "of discovery" (ditto) regarding my mental health - a real direction. And it sets up some of the things I'll be talking about in future posts...
I tend to have a few mantras now. Not the shitty religious or spiritualist foo foo ones, but something a bit more grounded.
And then there's the questions and the senses stuff. They really help.
Explain?
Questioning the logic behind thoughts when you spiral. My doc told me to get this book about anxiety and mental health. Not a woowoo book but by a scientist that kind of explains and outlines that actually your brain is a monkey organ that is essentially forced to learn to function in a developed society so it's more about biological survival urges that are misunderstanding what it's being presented with.
So questions like "is what you think is happening, happening?" Or "is there any evidence to support that thought?". And the senses stuff is the non woo woo and more psychological version of mindfulness which is meant to just calm and relax you in the moment but with no snake oil of improving your whole life. When feeling overwhelmed by anything, you sit and spend ten to thirty seconds on all your senses, just mentally describing their sensation. The key is to not explain the sensations, just describe them. Say you start with your taste, maybe it's a bit iron-ish because you've got an ulcer, or you can taste your coffee from earlier still and still some sweetness from a bit of bread stuck in your tooth slowly turning its carbohydrates into sugar. Then touch. What's the chair you're sat in feel like? What's the back support? Maybe one point is sticking into you and it's got leather on the seat that feels cooler on your body than the rest of the chair. Can you feel the lanyard hanging off your neck, how's the top you have on? Then go through the other senses. The whole point is to completely take you away from thoughts running away and just rooting you in a material reality. Really helpful.
There were a few books but two of the main ones were Unfuck Your Brain by Faith Harper and Don't Feed The Monkey Mind by Jennifer Shannon.
Thanks. I'll look into those.
What you describe is kind of the process I've adopted, in a ramshackle, amateurish fashion. But I've become interested in the subject (not the rainbows and unicorns side of it) and have started reading up when I get the opportunity. Trying to find the way to approach it while still maintaining my essential cynical bastard side.
I think there's a lot of spiritual bullshit and business focussed books on the matter and poor support. But those books are what my GP told me to read as, in his words, "look, you're a scientist, so self help bullshit won't work, you need to really understand what's happening in your brain". And the techniques, I think, work particularly well and it's not offering snake oil promises of cures but rather they're intended to help in the moment when you need it.
I'm not a scientist, but I have the same reaction to self hell BS, so this is appreciated. I've started a thing on my blog called Self Help for Cynics in which I try to sift through the dross and find usable nuggets. With extra help from songwriters. Writing has always been a help, as is music, so I'm combining them all.
There's so much of it that preys on selling bullshit and something for people to believe in. I just want to understand it and have coping mechanisms, which is all science can handle.
And I know it's kind of hard to break out of the men have to keep it together thing, but you know I'm about.
Cheers. Never really been one of those types anyway.
I gather, with your love for Morrissey and pop in general.
But still. You've got a millennial friend. We're much more open to talk about these things. I know the acerbic wit is our basis, but I like you alive and well.
Appreciate that, but I'm not about to top myself. Just want to get through the week without ping-ponging between anxiety, rage and other emotions I can't find the right words for because it's very late.
I'm not saying you are, but more so I mean life, when in the depths can be colourless and you become a shell of a person... but I prefer the acerbic wit and humour of you not in that position and the negative impact that has on life.
Now for a put-down to equalise our friendship: Morrissey is a wanker.
Hardly a point of contention these days. And yet...
Last week, we looked at songs that mentioned Corrie. But what about the characters in Corrie? Some of them have been around so long, or made such an impact on popular culture, that they too have been immortalised in song. Let's start with Weatherfield's longest serving resident, the only one who's been there from the very start...
Ken Barlow
At 91 years of age, William Roache is in the Guinness Book of Records as the longest-serving television star in a continuous role. Which just goes to prove that charisma is not a prerequisite for TV success. Here's Harry Hill's reverential tribute...
My name is Ken And I will see you on Monday, Thursday and Friday Mountains may crumble, Rivers may run dry, But I will always be here For I am your friend - Ken!
Ray Langton - saw him off Len Fairclough - never stood a chance Mike Baldwin - ha ha, Poor Mike.
Elsie Tanner, Hilda Ogden, Ena Sharples - all gone Yet I remain...
But the last word on Ken has to go to Nigel Blackwell, who always fancied himself as the frontman of American indie band Sebadoh... sadly, it was not to be.
I could have been like Lou Barlow But I’m more like Ken Barlow
From Ken, we obviously have to go to his long-suffering spouse, Deirdre. Ken and Deirdre got married twice - firstly in 1981, a day or so before Prince Charles married Princess Di. More people watched the fictional marriage. Their second marriage, in 2005, happened the day before Charles married Camilla. Again, more people watched Ken & Deirdre.
The biggest upset in the Ken and Deirdre's marriage was when Deirdre had an affair with rag trade J.R. Mike Baldwin. The Toy Dolls are still recovering from the trauma...
The Band Name Of The Week award goes to Bleeding Heart Pigeons. They're from Ireland and appear to be named after Luzon, an actual breed of pigeon that has a big red patch on its chest, also known as a "stabbed pigeon".
I can almost smell the burning It's all overloading The plot goes in circles and the Characters are possessed Deirdre throws a trifle across the room Richard drives in a river screaming 'I love you' Small trifles coalesce Into one big mess And it's fucked up
Pat Phoenix was, of course, one of the show's iconic Grand Dames...
Elsie Tanner
So iconic that Elton John placed her at the end of a very distinguished list...
Marlene Dietrich Marilyn Monroe Brigitte Bardot Doris Day Billie Jean Samantha Fox Joan Collins Kiki Dee Katharine Hepburn Vivian Leigh Grace Jones Priscilla Presley Vanessa Williams Dusty Springfield Nancy Reagan Rita Hayworth Petula Clark Julie Andrews Superwoman Annie Lennox Mata Hari Anouska Hempel Shirley Temple Tallulah Bankhead Linda Lovelace Little Eva Natassia Kinski Princess Caroline of Monaco Miss Pat Verness Elsie Tanner
It always made me laugh when you heard Jean Alexander talk in real life, how posh she was.
Now... which Coronation Street character do you think I found mentioned in more songs than anyone else... if it's not one of the big names above? Rita? Gail? Jack and Vera Duckworth? Sadly, I couldn't find anything for any of them. No, the true Queen of Corrie (according to the TV On The Radio Jukebox, anyway) is...
Ena Sharples
Look, life is very intricate, when you're in the crowd
Jeymes Samuel is Seal's younger brother. He makes music under the moniker Bullitts. He was born in 1979, one year before Ena Sharples left Coronation Street for good. So he must have been watching the show at a very young age...
Even younger that The Bullitts though is Connecticut "Indie Rapper" Armando Acevedo II, aka Sketch Tha Cataclysm. The mind boggles as to where he came across the name Ena Sharples, although he does pronounce her first name "Enna", which makes me think he's just done a google search for words that rhyme with metacarpals.
Our final Ena mention comes from Richard Jobson and Stuart Adamson in a glorious punky list song that celebrates a number of Corrie (and Crossroads) stars, including Annie Walker and Stan Ogden, while Hilda, Bet and Eddie Yates get a mention on the Peel Sessions version. But the chorus belong to one man and one man only...
Albert Tatlock
So the last word goes to Albert... but being the sole focus of a chorus by The Skids is not this Corrie character's greatest claim to pop immortality. Oh no! Because actor Jack Haworth, who played Albert for almost a quarter of a century, was also responsible for the spoken word introduction on this...
The girl from Ipanema goes walking. And when she passes, each one she passes goes, ‘ahhh’.
So go the English lyrics to “Garota de Ipanema”, the second most recorded song in popular music (after bloody "Scrambled Eggs"). The woman who sang those lyrics on the version that became an international hit was Astrud Gilberto. Jazz saxophonist Stan Getz, who also played on the track, made enough money from that record to buy a 23 room mansion. Astrud got $120.
Astrud Gilberto passed away earlier this week. Here are some tunes to pay tribute, starting with a song that owes quite a debt to the track above...
Odd Nordstoga is a Norwegian folk singer. He's the same age as me, but looking at him, I reckon there's a portrait in his attic that's rotting to pieces.
Melankoliens avenyar
Der var eg heime ein gong
Eg trudde alt det vakre
Som Astrud Gilberto song
Med Marty Paich sitt orkester i 1965
Og diktarens ord kom føre meg
Du skal aldri komme hjem
It translates, very roughly, and rather wonderfully, thus...
But this was my favourite. You may remember Basia, originally the singer with 80s band Matt Bianco, before she branched out on her own. Here she is on the Johnny Carson show, with a song from her hit 1987 album Time & Tide...
Nobody knows where she came from
The tall-and-tanned-young-and-lovely girl
With a voice as light as air
Nobody knows but no one cares
'Cause everybody loves her
Finally, because because, here's Astrud with George. 'Nuff said.
And then another. Stevie Jackson is the guitarist in Belle & Sebastian. He also released a solo album in 2011 with the superb title (I Can't Get No) Stevie Jackson. Who wouldn't want that in their collection?
Not all the lyrical references above are pure product placement, of course. The term "mother's pride (and joy)" is commonly used to refer to "the emotion a mother feels when one of her children succeeds in some endeavor, and I rejected quite a few lyrics on the basis that I doubted they'd ever heard of the bread. However, both the artists below grew up in the 60s and 70s and would have been familiar with the brand when they came to name songs after it, even if the songs in question might have more to do with maternal delight than sliced bread. They knew what they were doing, is my point.
Let's start with George... a different George than the one who inspired this post...
That's a pretty emotional tune about loss, one I've not heard in years.
On the other hand, we have a Paul Heaton song that compares Mother's Pride with Father's Pride... and the dads have a lot to answer for.
Having prepared my Top 22 of 2022 well in advance, I took a little break from blogging over Christmas. Hence I didn't get to comment on Terry Hall's departure... though many of you guys did a fine job in eulogising him. I've not much more to add. Except...
I shared a birthday with Terry Hall. We were both born on March 19th. Granted, he was born 13 years earlier than me... but 13 years is nothing, is it? These days, I feel far more kinship with people who are 13 years older than I am than with those who are 13 years younger. He meant a lot to music fans of my generation, and to many of his fellow musicians too. Here are a few songs that mention Terry's various musical projects...
Music fell like rain to the streets The Specials and The Jam, to The Beat Even though I think I've seen everythin' There is to see of this world I gotta be thankful that this crowded space Is the place of my birth
I know you miss the good old days of picket lines and flags When the Specials and the Jam all ruled the charts but if you're really looking for this generation's Billy Bragg's We are all here with a fire in our hearts
I followed her to Vinyl Ink Though I kept my distance I followed her through the stacks These were the records she found and she held and she later bought: The Fun Boy Three, Air Miami and Kraftwerk Considered The Soft Boys but opted for Bandwagonesque George was still around then and he said "Have you heard the Hit Parade record yet?"
To finish, here's one that mentions Terry by name. A beautiful track from Tracey...
Here is the street and here is the door Same as it was before And up the stairs and on the wall Is Doisneau's 'Kiss' and Terry Hall And Siouxsie Sioux and Edwin too And Bobby Dee in '63 And everything I knew was good And like it was just understood
As none of the above mention my favourite Terry Hall incarnation, The Colourfield, here's a track from the band themselves which does so eponymously.
Tim Booth is sick of me using him as a clue for people called James. Sugar Ray is less bothered.
"I never knew that George Harrison song was a cover version," Louise said to me the other day. I had to admit, it took me years to discover the original too. But when I did... hoo boy!
Roxanne... you don't have to put on the red light. I've given the green light to another part of the Snapshots saga next Saturday.
