Monday, 4 February 2013

My Top Ten Sheep Songs

They're flocking baaad.

10. Pink Floyd - Sheep

Look, I don't mind if you skip this one. It's 10 and a half minutes long. According to the lyrics, it does apparently feature a rather amusing version of The Lord Is My Shepherd in which the sheep wreak their revenge through karate "and make the bugger's eyes water"... but you have to listen VERY carefully. I certainly couldn't hear it.

9. Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds - Sheep May Safely Graze

Being an Australian sheep seems a hell of a lot more dangerous than being a British sheep. Having to worry about crocodiles, poisonous spiders and Nick Cave... brr!

8. Cake - Sheep Go To Heaven
I just want to play on my pan-pipes
I just want to drink me some wine
As soon as you're born you start dying
So you might as well have a good time
7. Scott Walker - Black Sheep Boy

Written by Tim Hardin... who did very well in our previous Top Ten... but in all fairness, he's no Scott Walker, is he?

6. Airhead - Counting Sheep

Not quite as all-conqueringly astounding as their previous single, Funny How (The Girls You Fall In Love With Never Fancy You... Funny How The Ones You Don't Do)  but then, few things are.

Plus, they got some actual sheep in for the video. 

5. Morrissey - Yes, I Am Blind

OK, this would probably be higher if it actually mentioned a sheep in the title.
Little lamb
On a hill
Run fast if you can
Good Christians, they want to kill you
And your life has not even begun!
Oy! Morrissey! No! Didn't you tell us Meat was Murder?
You're just like me, just like me
Oh, your life has not even begun!
Oh. Fair enough then.

4. Genesis - The Lamb Lies Down On Broadway

See, it's still cool to admit to liking Peter Gabriel era Genesis.

And probably very uncool to admit you haven't got a bloody clue what he's on about.

(Still preferable to the Pink Floyd track though.)

3. John Grant - Leopard and Lamb

Don't be surprised if I compile a Top Ten Leopard Songs one day just to feature this track again.
Watch the Simpsons to remember how you laugh
I miss your dark blue eyes, and staring at your back
My leopard, my lamb
2. Kate Bush - And Dream of Sheep

In which Kate falls asleep counting sheep and listening to the shipping forecast.
Ooh, their breath is warm
And they smell like sleep,
And they say they take me home.
If anyone else sang those lyrics, I'd snigger. Kate makes them magical.

1. The Housemartins - Sheep

You're right, of course, sometimes the only reason I compile these charts is to give me the opportunity to proclaim the supreme majesty of records such as this one.

By my calculation, Paul Heaton and Norman Cook were in their early 20s when they filmed this video... even though they both look about 12. Heaton still dresses like your grandad though.

Those were my sheep songs - no room for Woolly Bully, but that had its day in my Top Ten Knitwear Songs.

Which one is your baa-baa-best?


  1. Assume that as usual you'll exclude my entry...Baa Baa Black sheep? Or Mary had a little lamb?

    Apart from that...who would have guessed sheep have had such a musical influence.

    Julian Cope did a song about Black Sheep...dreadful

    1. It's not that bad... it actually came quite close to being included.

  2. Kreator - Lambs to The Slaughter - Obviously (says OH)

    Whereas I say - Life's a treat with Shaun the Sheep. You can always rely on me to dig up the crap. No, no, don't thank me, it's no trouble really.

    1. First, and probably only, mention of Kreator on this blog... I'm too scared to go listen to it.

      As for Shaun... I'm to old.

  3. The Jam - Going Underground "The braying sheep on my TV screen
    Make this boy shout, make this boy scream..." It rarely gets better than that.

    1. I'm not sure I ever realised that's what he was singing... but, yes.


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