Saturday, 15 March 2014

My Top Ten Dirty Songs

Ten songs in need of a good wash.

If you came looking for Christina Aguilera, you'll end up disappointed. She can't even spell 'dirty'...

10. Don Henley - Dirty Laundry

Here's one I haven't listened to in 20 years. A condemnation of TV news sensationalism from Henley's debut solo album.

9. Poison - Talk Dirty To Me

Hair metal at its best. If you believe such a thing is possible.

8. Frank Zappa - Dirty Love

 If there's a dragon in your dreams, Frank's here to help... at a price.

7. AC/DC - Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap

Kinda like 118 118 for bastards.

6. The Bastard Fairies - Dirty Sexy Kill Kill

How can you not want to listen to a band called The Bastard Fairies? Especially when they sound like Amanda Palmer backed by the Eels? Get out while you still can!

Last I checked, this was even available for free download from their website.

5. The White Stripes - Dead Leaves And The Dirty Ground

In which the line between Jack White and Johnny Depp blurs imperceptibly, courtesy of director Michel Gondry.

4. Lou Reed - Dirty Blvd.

 Lou takes a serious shot at his hometown. Amazing storytelling.
Give me your hungry, your tired, your poor I'll piss on 'em
That's what the Statue of Bigotry says
Your poor huddled masses
Let's club 'em to death
And get it over with and just dump 'em on the boulevard
3. The Pogues - Dirty Old Town

Written by Kirsty's dad, back in 1949, but Shane made it his own. You don't hear many opening lines better than this...
I met my girl by the gas works' wall...
2. Bonnie Tyler & Todd Rundgren - Loving You Is A Dirty Job But Somebody's Gotta Do It

Written by Jim Steinman, like all the best Bonnie Tyler songs. You could probably guess that from the length of the title and the inclusion of orchestra, 12 sticks of dynamite and kitchen sink in the score.The video is also a work of demented 80s genius... featuring Hywel Bennett in the Todd Rundgren role.
There were times when we fought like tigers
There were times we were damn good liars
There were times we extinguished every
That was burning, burning, burning up each other alive
From the heavens on down to the dives
There were times we lost it all we lost it all
There were times we lost it all we lost it all
1. Steely Dan - Dirty Work

I've been listening to this a lot lately since its appearance in my Film of 2014 (so far... but then, I have only seen two), American Hustle. However, over the last few months I've also been listening to a helluva lot more Steely Dan than I ever have before. I am officially middle-aged. (I reach The Meaning of Life, The Universe & Everything this week, folks!)

So I am now at the stage in my life where I'd rather listen to a 42 year-old Steely Dan song (this, from their debut album, is as old as I am) than anything Radio 1 would ever play. These Top Tens used to contain a lot more Cool Young Indie Music and a lot less Sad Old Muso Music. I always dreaded this day... but you know what? It ain't that bad... 

Which one would you scrub up for?


  1. Never thought I'd be picking a Michael Jackson song but Dirty Diana is an obvious choice.

    1. It was in consideration... but in retrospect, although I bought Bad on vinyl when it came out just like everybody else on the planet, I see it now as the beginning of Jacko's slide. It's probably his most dated album and Dirty Diana doesn't even stand up as well as Man In The Mirror or Liberian Girl...

  2. That Steely Dan CD (Remastered) was the first of theirs I bought - I recall it being reviewed in either issue 1 or 2 of mojo by Nick Hornby. And I don't think there is a duff track on it.

    1. No, there isn't.

      (The one comfort I have in embracing my Sad Old Muso side is that you did it years ago. ;-)

  3. Can you shut your eyes and imagine a witty and interesting comment with a number of songs in it: well done, that was the comment I left on Friday that my computer appears to have eaten.

    So now I just say Jason Derulo, Pink Floyds Dirty Women - isn't called that apparently, who knew, well you obviously and HWMBO mentioned KISS Dirty Livin'

    The original so so much more complex honestly!

    1. I much preferred your original comment too.

      Tell HWMBO that Kiss Kame Klose. (Much closer than Pink Floyd, anyway.)

  4. A special mention for anything involving Ol' Dirty Bastard, I suppose....but only because it's all I can think of to add, not because of any musical merit.

    "Inside Llewyn Davis" is my film of 2014 so far... but then it is the only thing I've seen at the cinema this year, as yet. Hoping to remedy that soon with The Double and Under The Skin.

    1. Inside Llewyn Davis is the only other film I've seen at the cinema this year... and it'll probably end up as my #2 come year end... but much as I love the Coens, for sheer enjoyment, American Hustle will take some beating.

  5. I'm convinced there are hundreds of dirty songs out there, but am struggling to think of a single one, except Dirrrrrty by Christina Agulaira...I think I quite liked it at the time...

    1. Yes, but what did you think of the SONG?

  6. Hi Rol sorry for the late contribution.

    Glad to see the Pogues on the list, that would have been my number one.
    Other suggestions:
    Dirty World - Travelling Wilburys
    Dirty Creature - Split Enz
    Ego is Not a Dirty Word - Skyhooks
    Dirty Old Egg Sucking Dog - Johnny Cash
    Dirty Little Girl - Elton John

    1. Cheers, Deano. The Wilburys came close... and I can't believe I forgot Johnny's dog! Will have to try and check out the others.


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