I didn't really know what to call this week's Top Ten, and I only really settled on "Mythical Creatures" under protest... since clearly everyone knows Bigfoot isn't a myth.
Apologies, all you sceptics, but I'm 100% Fox Mulder: I want to believe. The alternative is a much more boring world.
Anyway, here are ten songs about creatures I'm willing to be convinced are just as real as you or I...
"Well, buddy... say the police thought you'd done something bad. Like, say they thought you'd broken into Sid's house and stolen all his chocolate, and they knew the break-in was a 7 o'clock last night. So imagine you'd been at a party at that time with 30 of your friends who could all prove you were there... well, that'd be your alibi. Proof that you didn't steal Sid's chocolate."
"Oh. OK. So... why's this guy waiting for one? What's he done?"
I did look for a picture of Sarah Jessica Parker holding a camera. That would have been timely with the whole Sex & The City revival going on right now, Unfortunately I couldn't one. Also, SJP annoys the hell out of me. Unlike the divine Sarah Paulson, an actress who elevates any film or show she appears in.
So it's Ms. Paulson who introduces our Top Ten Sarah Songs. Take it away...
10. Oft welcomed, a comet flowed.
"Oft welcomed, a" and "a comet flowed" are both anagram...
We have a new guest this week on Guest Post Thursday - our old friend Rigid Digit, and even better... it's his round! Take it away, RD...
3 months of Lockdown hasn’t actually been as bad as
initially feared.
Work continues, buying music continues unabated.And after early difficulties, shopping, beer
and spirits, and a selection of snacks (including Frazzles, Pork Scratchings,
and Ritz Crackers) continue to arrive at my home.
As advised, daily exercise involves a 30 or 60 minute walk
around the local area.12 years I’ve
lived here, and I’ve discovered new roads, paths, and houses I never knew
existed.
One such walk, on a warm evening, concluded with a walk up
the hill towards home and past the local Pub.
It was at that point it hit me – “I could murder a Pint”
Yes, I can imbibe at home – but the sitting in a Pub nursing
a Pint of frothing ale is but a dream at this time.
The potential easing of restrictions suggests Pubs and
Restaurants may be opening soon, but until that time when I/We can enter the
local hostelry again, here are 10 Boozy Based Tracks to keep the Spirits up (do you see what I did there?)
Bad Manners did a sort of Two Tone Ska thing with added
Music Hall.Buster Bloodvessel’s gurning
upped the comedy angle, as did frequent appearances on Tiswas.
This track may not be strictly “about” booze, but namechecks Lemmy’s favourite
drink (after Jack Daniels), and is one their very best.
Straight out of Canvey Island, plying no nonsense R&B,
and you wouldn’t want to start a fight with any of them.A supposed autobiographical tale of
songwriters Nick Lowe and Gypie Mayo consuming too many Kahlua based drinks at
a John Lee Hooker show.
Despite having no original members, Dr Feelgood continue to
tour to this day – and a thoroughly great show is guaranteed
The Irish do like a drink (apparently), and it would take
about a month to complete a Pub Crawl in Dublin’s Temple Bar (you may also need
a second mortgage).Those in the North
are equally thirsty too.In my
experience they also have some of the most welcoming Pubs I’ve ever been in.
The Who By Numbers isn’t a bad album, just often forgotten
in the pantheon of ‘Oo greats.
OK – it’s a patchy album.After Who’s Next and Quadrophenia they just sound a bit laboured in
places.But the good outweighs the not
so good, and is ripe for re-discovery.
This track deals with the darker side, and catalogues Pete
Townsend's experiences and reasons for giving up the demon drink.
There are 9 official albums in The Doors catalogue – I
reckon all you need is the debut (from which this track is lifted) and The Best
Of The Doors, and you’re pretty much covered.
Also, this track is apparently responsible for Status Quo’s
change in style from psychedelic pop to heads down no nonsense mindless boogie
This track is never less than an absolute joy.Jangling guitars, speedy delivery (all done
and dusted in under 2 and a half minutes), and a video featuring
mad/uncomfortable dancing, a claymation sequence, and a cameo from Phill
Jupitus.
He drinks a Whiskey drink, he drinks a Vodka drink
He drinks a Lager drink, he drinks a Cider drink
And somehow this song escaped the BBC censors with the line
“pissing the night away” – George Formby’s harmless, but suggestive, “With My
Little Stick of Blackpool Rock" gets banned, but a song about alcohol
abuse containing a naughty word is absolutely fine.
Fresh over from Ireland, the band need a hit single to repay
Decca’s faith.They deliver a re-working
of an old folk song, hit the top 10.It
gets too much for Eric Bell who goes back home, but Phil Lynott gets a taste of
Rock & Roll lifestyle and a legend is born.
10. Underworld – Born Slippy
Lager, Lager, Lager …
Thanks, RD... I've long thought of doing a similar Top 10 myself, but was always crushed by the sheer weight of drinking songs available. Good to see my beloved whiskey well-represented, even though I haven't touched a drop in 20 years. (Can it really be that long?) RD also had quite a few leftovers in his list, so maybe I can persuade him back for a volume 2. Or perhaps you fancy a go at compiling your own drinking Top Ten. As always, the door is open for anyone on Guest Post Thursdays, and as I speak, there's a blank space in the diary next week...
8. Killed a mockingbird then drove off in a tiny emerald.
Harper Lee wrote To Kill A Mockingbird.
Rather obscure Irish band, although I did feature them here in my Top Ten Songs About American Writers. What do you mean you don't remember!?! I do love this song though.
Much to Steve's horror, it came down to a toss-up between this and Right Here Waiting by Richard Marx... and you know how I love my shocking 80s tat. You'll be glad to know that sanity prevailed. For once.
No matter what video I click on tonight, youtube keeps trying to sell me the new Justin Timberlake album. Please, youtube: check my viewing history. Am I really going to bite?
Although Lou Reed doesn't actually sing that, does he? One wonders if the record company tinkered with the title because it was sung by a man... although they didn't seem too bothered about all the thinly disguised drugs references. Oh, those swinging 60s...
A great Byrdsy riff opens this classic from one of the most underrated bands in the world. I know they've had loads of success over the years, but Tom and the Heartbreakers still deserve more recognition.
1. Leonard Cohen - Waiting For The Miracle
I
first encountered this song in the soundtrack of Quentin Tarantino and
Oliver Stone's Natural Born Killers. It has the perfect mix of menace and
magic.
The Maestro says it's Mozart
But it sounds like bubble gum
When you're waiting for the miracle For the miracle to come.
Don't tell me you're still waiting for another song?
Being of Irish-Catholic descent gives Leary a pass from getting lynched for this hilarious folk song mickey take. I think.
They come over here and they take all our land They chop of our heads and they boil them in oil Our children are leaving and we have no heads We drink and we sing and we drink and we die
Well, he's half-Irish, half Salford... as he likes to keep reminding us. One of his most visceral and exciting rock songs... even if, in the end, it's more about England than Ireland. Still...
A song written by Ewan MacColl (Kirsty's dad), made famous by the Dubliners (see below), but it's Shane's version that does it for me... if anything, he sounds even dirtier than the town he's serenading.
I wouldn't normally include two songs by the same artist in one Top Ten, but this is the very best version...
There was Barney McGee
From the banks of the Lee
There was Hogan from County Tyrone
There was Johnny McGurk
Who was scared stiff of work
And a man from Westmeath called Malone
There was Slugger O'Toole
Who was drunk as a rule
And Fighting Bill Tracy from Dover
And your man, Mick McCann
From the banks of the Bann
Was the skipper of the Irish Rover
There's been a fair few songs written about "The Troubles" (spare me Sunday, Bloody Sunday) but this has to be the most breathtakingly beautiful.
Best use of a minor chord in a pop song ever?
1. Thin Lizzy - Whiskey In The Jar
A traditional Irish folk song, recorded by everyone from the Dubliners to the Grateful Dead, Metallica to Pulp. But there can surely be no greater version than this. That guitar is just electrifying.
Musha ring dum a do dum a daiii. Wack for my daddy-o.
Those were my favourite songs about the Emerald Isle. Which is your sham-rocker?
