My Top Ten Girls vs. Boys Songs

Ten girl songs versus ten boy songs. Who will come out on top?


10. Generation X - Modern Boys vs. Sheena Easton - Modern Girl

Billy Idol vs. Sheena Easton... who would you put your money on?

The boys outnumber the girl here, but they teach 'em to fight tough in Glasgow.

Sheena takes the first victory for the ladies.

9. Morrissey - Girl Least Likely To vs. Boy Least Likely To - The Battle of the Boy Least Likely To

Regular viewers will realise we can't let Morrissey win one of these - not even to a band who named themselves after one of his songs. I say because it's because he needs to maintain that perpetual losing streak, you probably say it's because he's a nazi.

The boys make it one all.

8. Alison Moyet - Ode To Boy vs. Carl Barat - Ode To A Girl

Well, obviously this one goes to Alison... although that does mean the boys go one up.

7. The Seekers - Georgie Girl vs. Jack Lukeman - Georgie Boy

"Jack who?" you cry. Surely Judith Durham claims a victory here.

Except...

There's something about the perkiness of Georgie Girl that has the worst kind of 60s sound to my ears... and that Jack Lukeman track is pretty damned good, actually.

3-1 to the boys! Oh no!

6. Death Cab For Cutie - Some Boys vs. Racey - Some Girls

So to get the girls back in the game, I have to choose RACEY over Death Cab For Cutie.

Thank god I'm uncool.

3-2.

5. Voice of the Beehive - Stupid Boy vs. Garbage - Stupid Girl

Very cool Beehive song (great lyrics too), but Shirley wins this one, bringing us back to level-pegging.

3-3

4. Freddie Mercury & Montserrat Caballe - The Golden Boy vs. John Martyn - Golden Girl

A nice simple acoustic John Martyn song vs. the operatic pomp of Freddie & Montserrat, a track from the Barcelona album which I've not listened to in ages. I was almost about to give this one to the girls too, but around the 2 1/2 minute mark, Freddie only goes and blows the bloody doors off. Wow.

4-3 to the boys.

3. Andrew Gold - Lonely Boy vs. Lucinda Williams - Lonely Girls

I'm going to confess something now... for many years, I considered Andrew Gold's Lonely Boy to be a masterpiece on a par with Morrissey's I Have Forgiven Jesus in regard to describing how my life felt... in fact I think I may have listened to it a bit too much.

On the other hand, I first heard Lonely Girls on an Uncut compilation CD and it was probably the track that introduced me to Lucinda Williams.

4 all.

2. Don Henley - Boys of Summer vs. Arab Strap - Girls of Summer

Arab Strab are hilarious, and this is one of their best.

But... Boys of Summer is one of the greatest songs of the 80s, and one of the best summer songs ever recorded. I saw a deadhead sticker on a Cadillac...

5-4 to the boys.

1. The Cure - Boys Don't Cry vs. Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons - Big Girls Don't Cry

Too close to call, surely?



Let's call it a draw to keep everyone happy...


But what would your verdict be? Boys or girls? Whoever wins, the losers don't cry...