Hot 100 #34

34 is a band, straight out of Kansas City, Missouri, one of those metal bands whose singer is in desperate need of a packet of Fisherman's Friends. Hear them roar here.

The number 34 proved to be another tricky one on the countdown, but as always you did your best to furnish me with suggestions.

Lynchie kicked off this week with a good ol' boy...

Ray Wylie Hubbard - Up Against The Wall, Redneck Mother

And it's up against the wall, redneck mother
Mother who has raised her son so well
He's 34 and drinkin' in a honky tonk
Just kickin' hippies' asses and raisin' hell...

Those bloody hippies, eh?

YouTube tells me that was "made famous by J.J. Walker". I suppose that depends on your definition of the word "famous".

Next to arrive last week was Douglas, still perturbed that I hadn't chosen either Bruce or Billy last week (I know, it kills me too) who decides to go a little off the beaten track this week as a result. I'll let him explain...

Monsters of Folk were a sort of one-off supergroup of Americana folk-rock greats, made up of Conor Oberst and Mike Mogis of Bright Eyes, Jim James (My Morning Jacket) and M. Ward. They take turns songwriting and taking lead vocals, and though I love the album, it is as a result a little uneven...like they haven't fully learned each other's strengths and are in a bit of a tug of war for the reins. But there are some fantastic moments in there, including this song:

Monsters of Folk - Man Named Truth

Pain was hunting me down but I gave him the slip
then I fell in love with identical twins
They lived 34 summers between the two of them
I gave one my ego, I gave one my id
Yeah, I gotta get back to my pretty little twins
Don't ever buy nothin' from a man named truth
Don't ever buy nothin' from a man named truth
I'll tell you right now that it ain't no use
Don't ever buy nothin' from a man named truth.

Pretty deep that. Shame I'm so shallow. Luckily, Douglas had that covered too with his second suggestion...

Weird Al Yankovic - Skipper Dan

...doin' 34 shows every day
And every time it's the same
Look at those hippos, they're wigglin' their ears
Just like they've done for the last 50 years.

Next through the doors was Martin, who offered a couple more lyrical suggestions that he wisely assessed would be in my own library...

The Fall - I'm Going To Spain

I've sold my car, thrown in my job,

I'm 34 years old...

...you better hurry up and get there before Brexit.

Reverend & The Makers - What The Milkman Saw

What's going on at number 34?

Kev says there's bodies buried underneath the floor...

Rigid Digit was left scratching his head again this week, resorting to that perennial standby...

Kate Bush - 50 Words For Snow

34 - Sorbetdeluge

Now, before we get onto this week's winner, here's the customary trawl through my hard-drive…

Elton John - The Ballad of Danny Bailey (1909 - 34)

Molina & Johnson - 34 Blues

Al Stewart - The Last Day of June 1934

In a week of slim pickings though, it was C who provided our salvation, with a classic Lieber/Stoller composition. C originally suggested the version by The Searchers, but then wisely directed us to the original by The Clovers. I'm rather partial to the version by The Coasters too.

I took my troubles down to Madame Ruth
You know that gypsy with the gold-capped tooth
She's got a pad down on Thirty-Fourth and Vine
Selling little bottles of Love Potion Number Nine

33 next week. Should be a little easier, given revolutions per minute. What have you got for me?