I used to have heroes Now they're dropping like flies I used to have friends But they were old school ties I'm so tired of the ugliness And I have seen it all I'm so tired of the hurt in my heart And I can't stand tall I must be getting old, I'm missing everything Don't follow me, I'm stumbling Down Memory Lane
Some time ago, I began making a list of songs which were sequels to earlier songs... occasionally by the artist who did the original, but often by a completely different act. Initially I thought this would make a good Saturday Snapshots, but as the list grew I realised it would be quite a tricky one... and there were far too many good tunes to waste on a throwaway edition of the quiz.
And so, devoid of much inspiration for ways to keep this blog going beyond the tent-pegs on Tuesday and Saturday, I thought I'd make Sequel Songs a series. Starting with Two Pints Of Lager... and a Packet of Crisps.
Of course, everyone here will know the original version by Kentish ambassadors of "punk pathetique", Splodgenessabounds...
You're probably also aware that the song inspired a long-running BBC sitcom starring Will Mellor, Sheridan Smith and Ralph Little.
However, you may not have heard this sequel, released late last year by promising Norwich five-piece Bag of Cans.
Not being a drinker, I don't spend a lot of time in pubs these days (you're far more likely to find me in a coffee shop), but I still think this is a worthy update. Those of you more familiar with propping up a bar or two might find it painfully accurate...
Louis Eliot's Rialto were one of the great post-Britpop bands, lost in the flood of guitar groups trying to surf a wave that was already breaking. They released two great albums full of dark-night-of-the-soul indie, along with two of my favourite post-Britpop singles. The first feels like a dark sequel to The Day Before You Came, as sung by Scott Walker...
Keep hold of your valuables this morning - there's a right load of crooks about!
THE CROOKS #1
Meeting on the beach at The Hague (I didn't know The Hague had a beach) in 1965, this band of Dutch folkies broke up a few years later (going off to form King's Galliard and the Ramshackle Stringband) before getting back together to make more music in the late 70s, 80s and 90s.
The added E is because these guys came from a district of Sheffield called Crookes. For a millisecond in 2009, I thought they were the next big thing, mainly down to the fact that I was rather taken by their song Yes, Yes, We're Magicians. Then I blinked and suddenly they'd released 4 albums before splitting up, and I hadn't heard any of them and... where did the time go?
Their final single in 2016 was called The World Is Waiting. Sadly, it wasn't.
Around the same time, these lads from Cheltenham were doing their best to produce "melodic hardcore" (singing tarmac?). Also known as Crooks UK, the track below has over a million views on the tube of you, so they must have been a moderately big thing...
We'll close today with a bit of laid-back Dutch rap from 2021. To quote one youtube comment: "Rauwe echte hiphop, big up Crooks!!" Big up is apparently a universal phrase now.
There were many more Crooks to be found on discogs, but their music had all been stolen, so that's your lot for today. Which Crooks would you walk a Crooked Mile for?
This year, they're going one step further with an entire album dedicated to the actor known for his roles in Easy Rider, Blue Velvet, True Romance and Apocalypse Now. Waterboys frontman Mike Scott says, "It's the story of Dennis Hopper's life in songs - and the story of his and our times." Even better, Scott's invited some very special guests to help him wax lyrical about Hopper... including Steve Earle, Fiona Apple, Dawes singer Taylor Goldsmith... and one Bruce "I'll guest on anybody's record these days, saves me having to record anything new myself" Springsteen.
I'm looking forward to it... especially after hearing the first single...
