23 words describing each of my Top Ten albums of 2023. Because I use far too many words the rest of the year...
10. Whitehorse - I'm Not Crying, You're Crying
Husband and wife Luke Doucet and Melissa McClelland join forces for their 8th album, venturing further into Canadian Americana territory than ever before.
I went down division five local RCMP to file a missing persons report.
Well, they looked me up and down then their eyes went to the ground
They burst out laughing and they showed me the door
Said, "We ain't never seen nobody so lost before."
Poet Laureate Simon Armitage's latest band might come with the subtitle "For English Teachers Only"... but they deserve wider recognition. Poetry in emotion.
A slow-burner, with only one track representing his piano-stomping past; otherwise this is a reflective post-fame record to be relished by middle-aged musos.
Just another great Jason Isbell record. The quality never dips. If Laura is the First Lady of Americana, this guy is the President...
Are you looking for something easy?
Do you need to feel alive?
Do you crave a love that tears through your life like a Category Five?
My momma spent every day alone
In a house of noise and names
She got so tired of putting out fires
She just laid down in the flames
We're running out of options
I've told you all my jokes
If you insist on being lonely
Can you leave a couple smokes?
2. BC Camplight - The Last Rotation Of The Earth
Supposedly his final record (let’s hope not!), this sees Brian waiting for the Tesco man and dreading the future. Brutally honest and life-affirming.
"Oh, what a bеautiful morning"
I say to the Tesco guy
"I've seen my fair sharе
But there's something about this one"
He goes, "Are you okay?"
I look him in the eye
We both smile
1. Jenny Lewis - Joy'all
Wry melancholia, world-weary romance, exuberant self-sufficiency... it’s another flawless set from the former Rilo Kiley chanteuse - like the Carpenters but more kick-ass!
My forties are kicking my ass
And handing 'em to me in a margarita glass
I was infatuated with an older man
And then I dated a psychopath
So I'm 44 in 2020 and thank God I saved up some money
Homes Under The Hammer is one of many daytime TV shows (like Cash In The Attic, A Place In The Sun and The Antiques Road Trip) that I've never watched an episode of because I have a job. I think it's about auctioning houses. I'm not sure who the target audience is - my dad was a former auctioneer, and he never showed the slightest interest in it. Still, it's been going for 20 years, so someone must be watching it. And as a number of people who read this blog are now reaching retirement age, I imagine you rarely miss an episode. (I wonder if they show it in Portugal?)
You wouldn't imagine there would be many pop stars who spent their time watching Homes Under The Hammer either... except, it's well known that musicians are generally a bunch of work-shy bastards who will do anything to avoid the arduous manual labour of writing a new song. I bet most of them have never missed an episode of Countdown and are over the moon that Neighbours is coming back. Take this guy for example...
Here's a band with the wonderfully old-fashioned name of Courting, and a song I initially thought was about the Talking Heads man's arse, until I put my glasses on...
Homes Under the Hammer, well, it blares from the bar
Until Daddy picks him up in his European sports car
"A '19 plate?" Well, he muses who made it
"Built in England," he wonders, "a Britishman's labour"
Next up, another lovely little discovery: Colonel Dax. No, not the Kirk Douglas character from Paths Of Glory, but a guy called Tom Hughes from North Wales who likes listening to The Cure.
I'm walking on the pavement across from her old house.
Whoever lives there now is watching Homes Under the Hammer on the couch.
They look like they're a pair who've found what I could never find,
But maybe that's 'cos I'm the type to peek through people's blinds.
It's funny, they're sat in the exact spot I was sitting when she kicked me out.
I had a quick look at who the presenters were on Homes Under The Hammer, and I didn't recognise any of them... except for Tommy Walsh. And the only reason I knew his name was because of Nigel Blackwell...
Finally, here's the song that inspired this post, from one of my albums of the year, The Last Rotation of Earth. From listening to this record, it's clear that Brian Camplight rarely leaves his Manchester home, and the most excitement he has in his day is chatting with the Tesco delivery driver. But he's still managed to produce a cracking record. He claims it will be his last, which would be a crying shame, but I guess those daytime TV shows won't watch themselves...
I think I figured it out, it's right in front of me
Inflation or something to do with the Tories
She asks what we're building, I said, "What do you think this is -
Last Friday, I wrote about how my dad was a smoker when I was growing up - first cigars, then a pipe... and then he quit, immediately, when the doctor told him he had to.
On Saturday, I went to see my mum (as I always do) and she said she had something for me. I couldn't believe the synchronicity when she showed me what it was... my dad's old cigar case and one of his pipes. This was just one of those moments... I'm sure I don't need to say anything else.
She also asked if I wanted any of his old tools. Dad was a joiner by trade and had lots of tools, but most of them will be more use to my nephew who's followed in his grandad's footsteps. All I took was the saw and the ruler above, because I haven't got either, but also because they both contain powerful memories. The ruler in particular, Dad would carry it with him in his overalls at all times. It'd always be sticking out of his pocket. This is years ago, he hadn't done any joinery in over a decade, but it's good to remember him as he was before, rather than an old man who struggled to even get up out of his chair.
When Louise and I moved into our first house, I was pretty clueless about DIY. (Louise will tell you I still am, but I've learned a few things.) Dad came round and helped me put up a few shelves, just the basics, but it was a start. For years I'd watched him tinkering away and never really took any of it in. But I started to try when we got that house. One day the lock went on our old wooden front door. Dad came round, cut it out and fitted a new one. I can still see him standing there in the sunshine, with his bag of tools beside him on the doorstep. It wouldn't be long before he couldn't do that kind of thing anymore, but I know it meant a lot to him, to be able to help us while he could.
I asked Mum if there was one more thing I could have. The copper bracelet my dad wore to help with arthritic pain. Now, various studies say there's no proof these things help relieve arthritis in any way - hey, I've got the internet, so I checked! - but I've been getting pain in my wrists and thumb joints for some time now and I figure it won't hurt to try. There's another reason I wanted this bracelet though, and it's a much more morbid one, I'm afraid.
When the undertaker came to take my dad away, she asked me if I wanted to remove any jewellery he had on. He'd stopped wearing his wedding ring some years back because he was scared it would he'd lose it. So all he had on was this bracelet. The last thing I did for my dad, the very last time I saw him, was to take this bracelet off his wrist. And now I'm wearing it.
Martin wrote about BC Camplight back in April. He was a name I'd heard bandied about but not paid a lot of attention to. I still haven't got around to buying his new album (largely because I've just had to pay £480 for brakes and tyres), but I've been listening to this track a lot on one of my walking compilations. It reminds me of John Grant, and it's already a shoe-in for one of my songs of the year... my dad loved Die Hard too.
I am almost through watching Die Hard 2 for the 38th time
I would go insane
On a burning plane
I gotta block out most of the pain just like John McClane does
I wanna look myself in the eye and be a normal guy
And say some clever shit when I’m about to die
I told my Mom I wanted to kill myself
She said, "Brian, grow up
You're 40 years old, ain’t it time to stop that shit?"
Nancy Sinatra, and her sister Tina, once sent Ray Liotta a horse's head in the post after he turned down the chance to play their father in a TV mini-series they were developing. Ray would later play Old Blue Eyes in HBO movie The Rat Pack. Here he is giving it his best Frank..
Liotta is best known for his role as Henry Hill in the movie Goodfellas... though as movies go, I prefer Field of Dreams, in which he plays the ghost of Shoeless Joe Jackson. And I'm very much looking forward to his forward to his final movie, Cocaine Bear, filmed just before his death last May. Well, better that than Ray's starring role in an Ed Sheeran video...
Lots of rappers who always wanted to be gangsters have mentioned Ray Liotta in their lyrics, but we'll skip those guys, 'cos they're just a Neighborhood Full Of Nobodies. Still, it's not just rappers...
The crew and I will hang on the steps Outside a chippy shop in Oldham I'd make mistakes; they'd clean up the mess We'll play Texas hold-em and talk about religion
I wanna be Ray Liotta And live another day in the mafia
Here's what else will be playing on the jukebox in tribute to Ray, starting with this jazzy little number from Martin Sexton...
We meet at 3pm by the ATM on Saturday You pick out the show Then it's off we go to the matinee You'll be who you want I'll be who you want I'll be your Ray Liotta It's my lucky day
Nuch better is this, from a band who featured in Namesakes not so long ago... although they didn't go down particularly well. Perhaps this one will persuade you...
