Saturday Snapshots #139 - The Answers

And God Created Woman.

After that, he sat down and had a go at Saturday Snapshots.

Here's the answers he came up with...



10. Hot, fashionable vinyl clicks a clapperboard.

When you click a clapperboard, you shout, "Action!"

The Flaming Groovies - Shake Some Action

9. The most beautiful hairdresser I ever heard... but build like a stone.

In West Side Story, Maria is the most beautiful sound they ever heard.

The hairdresser (out of work at the moment, presumably) would be Vidal Sassoon.

Maria Vidal - Body Rock

Ah, the 80s never go out of fashion in this house.

8. First letter to where Sonny died... off we trot once more.

The first letter is A.

Sonny Bono died at Lake Tahoe (it says so in the song).

A - Here We Go Again (I Love Lake Tahoe)

7. Back when we used to bop like #2... and shag like an operatic solo.

Those Dancing Days are named after a song by our #2 artist this week.

Those Dancing Days - Fuckarias 

I'm very disappointed that I only discovered this band after they'd split up.

6. Mr. T shoots racist marmalade.

That really does look like Rob Brydon.

But, no!

Mr. T was B.A. Baracus.

The racist marmalade is Robertson's.

B.A. Robertson - Bang Bang

I'm not sure what to make of that after all this time. The video makes it look like a Kenny Everett spoof.

5. Third Scarborough herb for George... in shaky property.

Parsley, Sage, Rosemary & Thyme were the herbs in Scarborough Fair.

George Clooney.

Shakin' Stevens memorably covered this song.

Rosemary Clooney - This Ole House

4. Staple found in the middle of Elvis - I'm just saying.

Elvis's middle name was Aaron.

Pair that with Neville Staple.

Aaron Neville - Tell It Like It Is

What a voice.

3. Smoking hedge partner sets fire to jungle - call George! (Not that George.)

Benson & Hedges?

George of the Jungle was played by Brendan Fraser.

Brendan Benson - Tiny Spark

Forgotten how good that was.

2. Ellen zipped by like a Foreigner tune.

Ellen zipped is an anagram.

A Foreigner tune wasn't anything to do with I Want To Know What Love Is.

Led Zeppelin - Immigrant Song

Ever since the last Thor movie, that has been my favourite Led Zep song.

1. Top crying from conquering crow.

Levi Stubbs was the lead singer of the Four Tops.

William The Conqueror.

Crowing is like bragging.



They don't get much better than that on a Sunday morning.

See you next week.

My Top Ten Bang Songs

Because everybody enjoys a good bang. It's onomatopoeiatastic.

Special mention to The Bangles, natch.



10. Shirley Bassey - Mr. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang

Not an official Bond theme, but written by John Barry and performed by Dame Shirl, it might as well be.

He's fast and he's cool
He's from the school that loves and leaves 'em
A pity if it grieves 'em
Mr. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang's not a fool...

David Gedge stole the title for an excellent Cinerama song, but the internet let me down on that one.

9. B.A. Robertson - Bang Bang

The 70s king of bad lyrical puns strikes again!

Tony and Cleo struck out for the freeo down Egypt's way
But Caesar had squeezed her in Rome on his quilt for a day
Hey, hey

Now Anthony got really angry
Oh oh Caesar's hanky panky
She told em she would use em
And boy did she abuse em
Fall in love and blew em away

Ouch. That's B.A...D.

8. The Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Bang

And here's why I wouldn't ever... with Karen O. I couldn't handle the post-match commentary.

7. They Might Be Giants - Bangs

Why do Americans not just call it a fringe like everybody else?

6 Blur - Bang

Early Blur, from back when they were more baggy than Britpop. They Might Be Giants would consider Blur's haircuts perfect for this track.

5. Divine Comedy - Bang! Goes The Knighthood

Neil Hannon updates Noel Coward for the Miss Whiplash era.

So chain me, restrain me and teach me to kneel
Bind me and grind me beneath your high heels
Crack goes the whip and if someone should tell
Bang goes the knighthood, as well

4. Nancy Sinatra - Bang Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down)

Written by the late Mr. Bono (Sonny, not the other one... he's not late... and I don't want him ever to die because I don't think I'd be able to stomach the fawning obits) and originally a hit for his ex-missus. But Nancy's version edges that one out, for me... it's just that little bit more tragic.

3. Art Brut - Bang Bang Rock 'n' Roll

I'll admit it: my love of Art Brut is disproportionate to all the other, more famous artists in the history of pop music. Perhaps because I have a sneaking suspicion that if I'd ever had the guts to form a band, they've have sounded a lot like Eddie Argos and his motley crew. (They'd certainly have sounded more like Art Brut than they would Mötley Crüe.)

I don't want a girl that's with the band
I just want a girl that's gonna hold my hand
No more songs about sex and drugs and Rock and Roll
It's boring!

That said, I don't share Eddie's apparent disregard for The Velvet Underground.

We Are Scientists do an amazing cover of this track too... so good, it sounds like an actual rock song!

2. REM - Bang and Blame

According to Iffypedia, this was REM's most successful single since Shiny Happy People and they've not had a more successful record since. I find that a little hard to believe considering that makes it "more successful" than Man On The Moon, Drive, The Great Beyond, What's The Frequency, Kenneth? and Everybody Hurts (among others). Perhaps it was a much bigger hit in the rest of the world than it was in the UK? Anyway, it's a good song... but not as good as the ones mentioned above.

1. The Stone Roses - She Bangs The Drums

From the opening hi-hat tickles to the euphoric chorus, this could well be the Roses' finest moment: it describes the way we feel. (If only we felt that way more often!) And while many might balk at the idea of kissing Ian Brown where the sun don't shine, you can't fault his choice of breakfast: passionfruit and holy bread. Yum.




Which one gets you banging?

My Top Ten 'To Be...' Songs

Sorry I didn't post a Top Ten last week. I was too busy being a dad, being a teacher, being a constant pain in Louise's neck etc. etc. to be a blogger. Here's ten great songs beginning with the verb 'To be...'



10. B. A. Robertson - To Be Or Not To Be

Any song that begins:

"Now I'm a little shy
I like to stay homeo..."

...well, you just know that ain't gonna end well. Full credit to B.A. though: that sucker actually finds some even worse rhymes as this creaky 70s classic progresses. It's As You Like It, you know.

The Bard would probably prefer To Be Or Not To Be by Richard E. Grant & Orpheus which sticks to his classic text...but sullies it with a shabby, sub-Pet Shop Boys beat. 

9. Villagers - To Be Counted Among Men

A gorgeous acoustic ballad from the hugely talented Conor O'Brien, the closing track from his excellent debut album, Becoming A Jackal.

8. Mr. Big - To Be With You

Top cheesy early 90s tuneage. You think you're too cool for this: you're wrong. 

7. Belle & Sebastian - To Be Myself Completely

...I've just got to let you down.

Yes, you're dumped. But it's not you: it's me!

6. Idlewild - To Be Forgotten

Too Good To Be Forgotten... as Amazulu once had it. Though, shockingly, this one appears to have fallen off the radar completely. Not even on youtube! A crime.

5. Ryan Adams - To Be Young (Is to Be Sad, Is to Be High)

Ryan's debut solo effort begins with an Argument With David Rawlings Concerning Morrissey... which is exactly what it says on the tin. Once that's out of the way, this song starts the album proper... and in many ways, Mr. Adams has yet to better it.

4. The Jam - To Be Someone

One of Weller's finest moments.

And there's no more swimming in a guitar shaped pool
No more reporters at my beck and call
No more cocaine it's only ground chalk
No more taxis now we'll have to walk

3. Billy Idol - To Be A Lover

I make no secret of my profound admiration for Mad Billy McMad. Here he covers (and changes the title) of William Bell's 60s soul classic I Forgot To Be Your Lover to the point that it's unrecognisable,  all the while doing his trademark punk-Elvis impression in a boxing ring with the cast of C.A.T.S. Eyes on backing vocals. He even ropes a human version of Rowlf from the Muppets in to play the piano. They don't make 'em like Billy anymore, and that's a sad loss to the entertainment industry.

2. Nils Lofgren - To Be A Dreamer

Sound advice from the E. Street axeman's pop...

He said: "Son, I brought you here to dream
Life's not what the world would have it seem
The call of the wild makes you a believer
I brought you into this world... to be a dreamer."

Been listening to this a lot lately, and it keeps making me cry. What a sentimental old fool Sam's dad is.

When I got the idea for this Top Ten, I figured Nils would be top dog. But, of course, I'd forgotten this... 
Another one that rarely fails to reduce me to a sobbing wreck on the carpet: particularly as featured in the movie it was written for, Winged Migration. (It's a documentary about birds, but you don't have a heart in your chest if it doesn't ache for what our feathered friends put themselves through every year for a "holiday".)

1. Nick Cave - To Be By Your Side

Another one that rarely fails to reduce me to a sobbing wreck on the carpet: particularly as featured in the movie it was written for, Winged Migration. (It's a documentary about birds, but you don't have a heart in your chest if it doesn't ache for what our feathered friends put themselves through every year for a "holiday".)





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