June 12th is a a national holiday in Russia, commemorating the end of the Soviet Union back in 1990. And if that just makes you think of the WONDERFULNESS done since by that VERY NICE MAN Vladimir Putin then, GOOD FOR YOU.
(This post has been edited to stop the bots reporting me. I don't want to end up in a Siberian Salt Mine, thank you very much. I've got in enough trouble for slagging off Trump all the time.)
Remember what Sting told us - the Russians love their children too!
These are the sons and the daughters of parents who died in the last one
Do you think that they want to go through that again?
The destruction, the bloodshed, the suffering and pain
In the second world war, out of every three dead, one was Russian
If we try with all of our power
Can we not find a way to peacefully settle our difference?
Meanwhile, on the other side of the Cold War, it's a day to celebrate that strange visitor from another planet who became a symbol of truth, justice and the American Way. Except they don't say that anymore - in fact, about 15 years ago, Superman renounced his American citizenship and now represents "Truth, justice and a better tomorrow". Considering he's still an immigrant, it's a wonder the Tangerine Tosspot hasn't tried to have him deported. Or maybe he's worried the Man of Steel would move to Russia...?
It's been a hectic week here at Top Ten Towers - not much time for blogging.
Fortunately, George was ready to step in...
A few days ago, in the must-listen-to-every-song-all-the-way-through Namesakes series, Rol wrote that despite the title of his blog he does not actually write a Top Ten piece any more. (I'm glad to see George is finally calling that series by its proper name.) I emailed him to say that I had started several but never got to ten songs. Well, now I have. So here it is. A “Top Ten Dairy Songs”. A teacher of English would know: is it ironic that a top ten dairy list is compiled by a vegan? (Yes.)
The songs below are not in any order of preference.
1. Captain Beefheart and The Magic Band - Ice Cream for Crow
The title track of his last album, and a rollicking great, almost rockabilly, song.
In parts it sounds a game of pong gone mad. I’ve done a Rol here in stretching/ignoring the rule that the song itself must pertain to the title, but I can’t see any objection coming from either Rol or regular reader Ernie.
I object on the basis that I do remember it and wish I didn't. Ernie?
3.Billy Bragg - The Milkman of Human Kindness
One of my favourite “sing-along-with-Billy-Bragg” songs.
Anyway, components of custard are dairy, so it’s in the list. That funky bit in the song is made by a clavinet. I think.
5.Larry Williams - Peaches and Cream
Not one of his better known songs, but a fine 2 minute blast of rock and roll. And given it’s a 1950s rock and roll song, I suppose the peaches and cream of the song are not actually a fruit and a dairy product.
Bending the rules again*, but I’ve always lumped eggs in with dairy, probably from years of saying “vegetarian and no eggs no dairy”. Sung by one of my Top Ten favourite female singers. Mr CC has written (here) about our attempts to see Tarnation in Sheffield, he got the train from Glasgow, me driving up from Birmingham. Indeed he is very lucky never to have seen them twice!
And from the absolutely fantastic Quim Barreiros, from the first album of his that I purchased, “A cabritinha” (I’m 99% confident he is not referencing little female goats) and here you can see the great man in action, musically that is:
And I actually think this is a song about making an omelette. Of course, my knowledge is Portuguese entendres / sexual slang is almost zero. (I do know not to go to Mrs Woman in the veg shop and ask for tomatoes, though, only for tomato.*)
Somehow this song wasn’t banned. If anyone is thinking of doing a My Top Ten Sweetie songs, can I suggest Lollipop Mama by Wynonie Harries, a song that is of course about, according to wikipedia, a type of sugar candy usually consisting of hard candy mounted on a stick and intended for sucking or licking".
So there you are, a Top Ten Dairy Songs list, that probably only has one song about a dairy product.
And if he posts this, thanks go to Rol. Enjoy the music.
Thank you, George, for bringing the tone of this blog down several notches. Always good to see.
This post was inspired by a new song from Stephen Wilson
Jr., an Americana artist I’ve only recently discovered. He’s worthy of further
investigation if this sort of thing is your bag.
Anyway, the chorus informs us, “There ain't a
lot of boys named Gary these days”, a reminder of how birth names fall in and
out of fashion. (Amusingly, they’ve got the actor Gary Sinise to star in the
video… although it doesn’t end well for him.) This got me thinking about
the names of the kids Sam goes to school with… versus the ones I went to school
with.
I have a nephew called Gary. He’s about ten or twelve years
younger than me. But there are no Garys in Sam’s school. Neither is there a
Neil or a Sean, the names of my other nephews.
I started to think about the most common names of kids I
grew up with.
Sam doesn’t know any Richards. No Ricks or Rickys either.
And while he probably knows a few dicks… there are definitely no Dicks.
The weird thing is, I didn’t go to school with a single one
of those. In fact, if you’d asked me when I was a kid, I would have told you
they were all old men names. Harry Bamforth was an old farmer who lived across
the fields from us. So was Arthur Lockwood. And Frank Shaw. Albert Tatlock and
Alf Roberts were old blokes on Coronation Street. Eli and Isaac were names I
only read about in Old Testament RE lessons.
I wonder if, in another 20 years’ time, the classrooms will be full of Garys, Darrens and Daves again? There probably won't be many Donalds... but I could be wrong.
A final word today from Nigel (no Nigels in Sam's school either)...
A woman who described herself as "a little bit 'Bridget', A little bit 'Ally', a little bit 'Sex and the City'" And chose to call her baby boy Fred As a childishly rebellious attempt at a clever reaction To those who might have expected her to call him Julian or Rupert Bit of advice, call him Rupert, it fits, and besides it's a good name Don't be calling him Fred or Archie With all its cheeky but lovable working class scamp connotations Unless you really do have plans for him To spend his life in William Hills waiting For them to weigh in at Newton Abbot
In case you're wondering - yes, there will be a follow-up to this post about girl's names.
Louise and I celebrated the 20th anniversary of our first date back in February, but though we've been together through thick and thin since then, we've never got married. Neither of us are really a fan of the ceremony, the expense, or being forced into the limelight. If that's what you wanted, good on you, but it was never for us.
Today though, we're getting married. It's a small registry office thing in the Town Hall - me, Lou, Sam, her Mum and partner as witnesses. No big do. No suit or dress. Not even any rings. No expense... well, a little expense, but you can't do anything for free, can you? We're doing it for a very boring reason - inheritance tax, so that if one of us dies, the other one (and Sam) will be a little better off than if we'd not tied the knot. Who says romance is dead?
There were many times in my life I thought I'd never meet anyone who'd want to stay with me. Since we met, Louise has always been there for me... even when I've done her head in. You can't ask for more than that, I don't think. And if you think this is a particularly unsentimental post, well, all I can tell you is that Louise wouldn't thank me for writing anything soppy.
I'm really hoping Billy Idol might ride his motorbike through the Town Hall window, but I'm betting he'll be bleaching his hair today. Then again, neither of us will be wearing white.
I'm trying to keep away from the news this week, to take a break from the awfulness of it all, to grant my brain a temporary respite from Trump Derangement Syndrome. But that's almost impossible, isn't it?
I'm sure you've heard this by now. Everyone's heard it by now. Even people who don't like Bruce have shared it. I'm posting it here merely for posterity's sake...
And it's not the only one. I'm thankful that while I do my best to bury my head in the sand, there are people out there far braver than me, who keep on speaking out...
And here's a related tune from Mr. Hannon...
All the sycophants and narcs
All the cannibals and sharks
A secluded paradise
Of spies and cypress trees
Mar-a-Lago by the sea
Cheating losers on the greens
Swapping wives for beauty queens
Making turgid wedding speeches
Entertaining fascist leeches
Mar-a-Lago, how I miss
The golden johns in which I pissed
All that ostentatious wealth
The paintings of myself
When I was young and free
Oh wait... this just in! Even Roger Taylor's having a go.
Now, I know, you probably haven't got much time for Roger Taylor. I'm a Queen fan, and even I don't have much time for Roger Taylor. Still, fair play to him for this...
Welcome back to the Cancel Culture Club, where a distinguished committee of leading lights from the blogosphere (and me) debate old songs with attitudes that now seem rather suspect to modern ears.
Is this week's offering our most contentious contender yet?
I think I'll let Alyson from the Jukebox Time Machine do the introductions, as she's much better at it than I am. Alyson... What's It All About?
Sex, drugs and rock ‘n’ roll. A phrase we’ve all heard of which could almost have been coined for the Rolling Stones. I’m just about old enough to remember both the Beatles and the Rolling Stones from the mid-1960s, when we saw them on telly in black and white. I think I fell a little in love with baby-faced Paul McCartney, but I was always a bit unsure about the Rolling Stones as they exuded something I couldn’t possibly have understood back then. As I got (a lot) older, I realised most of their lyrics referenced sex, drugs or both which brings us on to their song Brown Sugar from 1971, the song up for debate this time.
It seems Mick Jagger wrote the lyrics to Brown Sugar whilst he was in Australia filming Ned Kelly and then in the Muscle Shoals recording studio in Alabama. Mick himself admits the song was a bit of a mishmash, with everything he was thinking of at the time thrown in. He also said he wouldn’t write those lyrics nowadays and the band no longer play the song in concert. But why?
Well, I for one, believe him when he said he was writing about what he was thinking of at the time. It is no secret that the band were habitual users of heroin back in 1971, the drug also known as Brown Sugar. He probably thought it could be a great title for a rock song whilst at the same time getting it past the censors. At this time in Australia, he was probably also missing his girlfriend of the time, Claudia Linnear, who was a very striking backing singer with Ike and Tina Turner. As a young man on the other side of the world, he was no doubt reminiscing about his sexual exploits with Ms Linnear which coincidentally fitted his Brown Sugar lyric. So far, I have no issue with the idea of the song and unlike our American cousins, I don’t think we in the UK had a particular issue in 1971 with interracial sex. If we cancelled all songs that refer to sex or drugs there would be very little left in the rock pantheon.
Once Mick arrived in Alabama to record the album Sticky Fingers, he had to finish the lyrics to Brown Sugar. Apparently, he sat with a yellow legal pad and soon came up with the song we now know. Based in a Deep South state, there is no doubt his mind would have wandered to the history of the place and what happened in the cotton plantations over a 100 years earlier. Again, there was interracial sex, but this time not of a consensual nature but that between master and slave. To be an attractive young black girl back then was a curse as you would have been repeatedly raped and forced to have sex with the white plantation owners and overseers, whilst their wives turned a blind eye. The verses of the song refer to this abhorrent practice which I really hope Mick included as a bit of a history lesson highlighting the gratification the white men got through using violence (the whip) towards a young girl.
Whatever Mick intended, the song now makes for a troubling mishmash of what happened during slavery, combined with references to the enjoyment to be had from both using heroin and having consensual sex with your black partner. A real juxtaposition. I can see how it wouldn’t go down well nowadays in the Southern States of the US. It was however a big hit in 1971 all over the world, as Keith Richards also came up with an excellent riff and rhythm for it. I’m tempted on this occasion not to cancel it but keep it in the public domain as it is still a great example of what the Rolling Stones did at their height and as a reminder of what happens when humans treat fellow humans as possessions or chattels, a practice that still goes on today.
Hope I’m not too out of kilter with everyone else although I think this one is going to be quite divisive.
Thank you, Alyson - as always, your research skills and historical perspective shine through. And yes, I do think we'll find a diversity of opinion below... yet I don't think we'll have too much disagreement overall.
Let's see what my old pal Martin from New Amusements thinks...
I must admit I hadn't really thought too much about, or listened too closely to, the lyrics of Brown Sugar before. I've been content to chug along with the riff, and just assumed the narrative was the singer's preference for black women, albeit expressed in sassy 70s dialogue. Maybe it was even an example of positive discrimination - after all, they "taste so good", presumably in comparison to plain old white sugar.
I do think that's an easy interpretation if you don't listen deeper - and as Alyson says above, it would be quite a button-pushing one for rock 'n' roll "bad boys" to make back in 1971.
But it's not about that, is it? It's about the slave trade, and more specifically about the rape and sexual assault of slave-traded women and girls.
The first two verses describe the trader and a house boy engaged in this, the last verse describes the narrator at it too. He attempts to explain this away, singing "I'm no school boy, but I know what I like" ... except that's no excuse.
The Rolling Stones have created a number of lyric videos for their biggest hits, and they're all up on their official YouTube channel... but there's no lyric video for this, which perhaps tells its own tale. And although it's their fourth most played song live (if setlist.fm is to be believed) they haven't done so since 2019. Maybe the band are in the process of slowly, gently cancelling it themselves? If so, that's good enough for me.
I think they probably are. Though as the legendary JC, aka The Vinyl Villain, suggests below, there are limits to self-cancellation in the world of rock 'n' roll...
I’ve long been troubled by this one. It is a ridiculously catchy tune, one that is tailor made for radio,and whose upbeat tempo seems to have a celebratory, ‘wave your hands in the air like you just don’t care’ feel about it.
But we really should care.
The lyrics are genuinely horrific as they glorify slavery, extreme violence against women and rape.
What makes it worse is how much Jagger seems to be enjoying singing the lyric...almost as if he is imagining himself as being the person carrying out all these acts of degradation, while the closer of ‘how come you taste so good, just like a black girl should’ interspersed with all sorts of whooping and hollering means racial stereotyping can be added to the charge sheet.
I believe that Jagger and Richards dropped Brown Sugar from the live set lists a few years back, so in that regard they at least have acknowledged it is a problematic song. But they and their management team will still happily collect the royalties that amass from the regular airings the song gets on radio stations...no real surprise given that the music industry is riddled with hypocrites.
It's easy to be a hypocrite when money is involved. Just ask Billy Bragg in his clifftop mansion. Actually, I think he sold that... no doubt to move into something even swishier. Not that I begrudge him a penny of it, because he's a socialist of the heart.
OK, so far we've all been in broad agreement. Though with each new comment, we seem to steer closer and closer to cancellation. Over to Walter from A Few Good Times In My Life. What do you make of Brown Sugar, Walter?
That's a really good example to talk about. I put the album on again and listened to it from start to finish, and I have to say that Brown Sugar is one of the weaker songs on this record. A simple rhythm and blues riff certainly doesn't make it one of their most popular. It's more likely the lyrics, which revolve around non-consensual sex between a guard and a slave girl.
It is well known that this type of lyrics are characteristic of Mick Jagger's attitude at that time, and he ventures into misogynistic territory that was later claimed by gangster rappers from the East Coast.
And no, I can't listen to this macho bullshit anymore. Obviously, the Rolling Stones feel the same way, since they removed the song from their live repertoire a few years ago and are trying to downplay this lyrical faux pas by claiming that the song is explicitly directed against slavery.
Ultimately, this song is one reason why we're talking about cancel culture.
Well, yes. Although Walter raises a good point that we touched on last time - and that's the preponderance of sexist attitudes still to be found in a lot of far more modern tunes from the world of rap and r 'n' b. The world has changed a lot since 1971... but how much has it really changed?
Someone else who, like Martin, hasn't really considered the lyrics of Brown Sugar until now is C from Sun Dried Sparrows...
I have a confession: I've never actually read, or given any thought at all, to the complete lyrics of 'Brown Sugar'... Perhaps it's because the tune and chorus are so familiar and it feels as if they have been for my entire life, that it's become a musical equivalent of "a part of the furniture". It's just there, and always has been, but it's never been that important to me either, so I couldn't actually recite it or sing along with it word for word. And now you've brought it into focus and, rather than just listen to it again, I sat down and read the lyrics in stark isolation. And the truth is, I felt really quite bothered by it.
I understand that it's describing a scenario and, as in murder ballads and songs like Tom Jones's 'Delilah' or Tony Christie's 'I Did What I Did For Maria', we can hopefully credit the songwriters/artists with (presumably!) not actually sharing the sentiments of the characters they inhabit in the song - just as we do with books, films, plays, etc. - we get that it's not autobiographical, nor are we going to think it's ok to murder someone or whatever just because we've heard a song about it. That's usually my reason for not wanting to cancel stuff.
But there's something about 'Brown Sugar' which I'm finding particularly discomforting / distasteful - now that I've finally paid full attention to it, that is! I think it's due to the combination of factors: slavery, racism, violence towards women and sexual objectification of a young black girl, punctuated with a particularly celebratory sounding chorus as our narrator appears to revel in it. I'm trying to analyse my new feelings about it now. Yes, perhaps that's what turns it for me - the inclusion of that chorus against the rest of it. If it had been an obvious 'story' type song all the way through, the verses could have been bracketed as such. But there's something about the way the chorus comes in which brings the story more up-to-date and seems to validate the sentiments, horribly. I don't know if I'm explaining this well...I'm finding it hard to describe and, to be honest, have completely surprised myself with this immediate reaction. All I know is, something about the song feels distinctly off now, for a multitude of reasons, but I had never even given it a second thought until asked to write about it here. So, Rol, this is quite the shock revelation for me. Contrary to my own expectations, I'm now not sure I really want to hear it again and given the huge Stones back catalogue to delve into for more superior songs too, that wouldn't really be a great loss. Wow, I hadn't anticipated this! And I'll be very interested to hear everyone else's views.
It's at times like this that I feel guilty for hosting this feature. Like I've spoiled this song for C now, and wouldn't it have been better to leave her happy with her surface interpretation? Ignorance is bliss. I hate the idea that this feature will spoil a song for anyone.
This seems like a good time to bring in the Dubhed himself, Khayem... because, unlike C, he appears fully aware of what's going on in this tune... and he's ready to put the boot in!
I might as well put my cards on the table and say that, however much is made of the legendary Jagger/Richards songwriting partnership, I find Jagger’s lyrics achingly poor most of the time. When I was in my teens, I saw the Stones as has-beens with nothing to say about my life and nothing to aspire to. My opinion about their music - the first decade and a half at least - has changed considerably over time but it’s fair to say that I still don’t go to The Rolling Stones to remind myself of Jagget’s lyrical prowess.
I never particularly liked Brown Sugar either, and that was before I stopped and listened more carefully to what Mick was singing, not just how he was singing it. The ‘ambiguity' about whether he’s referring to slavery or hard drugs or both is undermined by a heavy handed approach that even a naive would-be poet in Year 9 would think twice about committing to.
However, what defined the song for me was listening to the cassette version of Neil’s Heavy Concept Album inn 1984. Yes, as in Neil the character played by Nigel Planer in The Young Ones. The cassette offered up “extra verbal meanderings, including a 58-second ‘version’ of Brown Sugar.
In brief, Neil comes across a couple of buskers playing an instrumental riff, and he decides to get his guitar out of his bag and join in. Neil clearly has only a vague acquaintance with the song, coming in late when the buskers sing “Brown Sugar! How come you taste so good?”. As he echoes the next line, Neil realises what he’s singing and asks the buskers to stop. “Who wrote this song?” he asks. “I thought it was supposed to be about whole foods, free range eggs…"
And since then that’s what I always think of when I hear Brown Sugar.
Musically speaking, Brown Sugar is a good song. Lyrically, it’s terrible but rather than be cancelled, it should be cited as an example of how not to tell a story!
I've never heard Neil's version before, K... but clearly it's a thing of beauty and brilliance. Thank you.
I will say though that although I don't hold Mick Jagger up as one of rock's great wordsmiths, I do think from time to time he hits gold. Three examples below...
OK, maybe they're not going to steal Mr. Zimmerman's Nobel Prize In Literature, but I do think that all of those could be offered up as defence against any accusations of racism that might be levelled at Mick. He always seemed a pretty socially conscious dude...
That said, he's also written some very ill-advised lyrics... ones that make even Brown Sugar pale in comparison. Here's Our Man In Portugal... George!
The Rolling Stones, well, Jagger and Richard, have written some objectionable and quite nasty songs, such as Under My Thumb and Yesterday’s Papers. These two tracks seem to be deliberately offensive.
Brown Sugar, in comparison, is quite absurd with its language and I wonder if “no offence was meant”. Maybe I’m wrong. It’s yet another song where I dissociate from the lyric (or go to Georgie La-La land as my partner would say). And I say No to cancelling.
I'm surprised George didn't also mention this one, which deserved a mention back in the very first edition of the Cancel Culture Club, when we were debating Young Girl.
Going back to Martin's earlier point though... while we can't find a lyric video for Brown Sugar on the tube of you, we can find one for each of the above. 'Nuff said.
I thought it might be worth getting the opinion of an actual songwriter on this matter. So I consulted our resident troubadour, the wonderful Mr. John Medd...
Jagger’s "meagre" lyric writing? Who says?! Oh to have written *any* Stones song over the last 50 years…
Who am I to argue with an expert? But John, what about today's offering?
Brown Sugar? I love this song with every fibre of my being. Is it about cunningulus? Yep, probably.
Woah, woah - what now?
I just sent you a screen grab.
Okay... well, that certainly opens up a whole new line of enquiry...
Is it about Heroin? Yeah, that too. Does any of this matter? Of course not. It’s the Rolling Stones. In their pomp. In their majesty. Should it be cancelled? No! However, in America, they’ve cancelled it themselves seemingly and agreed not to play it live. Street fighting men? Maybe not so these days.
Of course, being a fan of a particular artist can make us more willing to overlook their tomfoolery. As anybody who still wants to listen to The Smiths will be forced to admit.
Over at No Badger Required, the estimable SWC recently held a vote on the Best Eponymous Albums Of All Time. Despite our host's own reservations (he refuses to even name the band these days, calling them only The Sm***s - I'm thinking of doing similar with Oasis, and referring to them only as *as*s from now on), their debut album came third in the countdown. I mention this to illustrate the complexities we wrestle with every time we fling open the doors of the Cancel Culture Club.
Mick Jagger is on record saying that he probably wouldn't be able to write this song in today's society. Which probably gives us some idea but I suppose back in the 70s Mick didn't remotely care about morals and all that.
Lyrically it is suspect. Musically, the riff at the start is incredible and Charlie Watts' drumming is amongst the best you'll hear and that sax solo about 90 seconds in is incredible.
It's also one of the best opening songs of any album anywhere.
But yeah...suspect...
SWC's comments illustrate the ambivalence we often feel when it comes to songs like this - the clash between head and heart, perhaps? And nobody summed that more perfectly this time than Swiss Adam from Bagging Area. That's why I saved his comments till the end...
The whole concept of cancelling art is problematic isn't it? Who gets to choose what's cancelled and what isn't? We usually deplore censorship. Regimes that ban art/ music/ literature are weak and authoritarian ones that are frightened of people, race, song, culture, sex, otherness. Cancelling anything is a high handed position to take. I suppose there's a difference between organic popular cancellation and government imposed cancellation but even so, the word cancel carries an ultimate weight of no return.
Some people try to separate the artist and the art and this seems an eminently sensible position to take but even here there is a sliding scale. Gary Glitter is done and gone. Michael Jackson's songs are still played on the radio. John Cleese complains long and hard about cancel culture- usually in mass market tabloid newspapers or on the tv and comes across as a mean spirited old duffer totally out of step with the modern world. Fawlty Towers is still (largely) funny.
Morrissey holds political beliefs and has attitudes about race that are impossible to justify but I can still enjoy The Smiths. Ian Brown has uttered some ridiculous shit about Covid and vaccines. I still listen to The Stone Roses. Nick Cave's position on Israel has been problematic for me and I don't agree with his attendance at whatever royal event he attended- the coronation?- but I get a huge amount from his music.
I used to love The Who but Roger Daltrey's knobheadery about Brexit and general small mindedness plus Pete Townsend's 'issues' (ok, arrest for child pornography) have made it difficult for me to listen to The Who. Have I cancelled them? Dunno- but I don't listen to them any more (made easier by the fact that I only really like The Who from 1965- 1969). I'm sure there are other artists whose views have put me off them.
Brown Sugar is a deeply problematic song. Racist? Yes. Sexist? Yes. A glorification of slavery? Yes. All these things and more. Utterly out of date attitudes and impossible to support. Even the Stones themselves have stopped playing it and Jagger has said that he'd check himself if he found himself writing those lyrics now. Keef maintains the song is about the 'horrors of slavery' but the tone, the music and the performance would suggest that everyone's really rather enjoying themselves rather than spotlighting the appalling treatment of female slaves on American plantations. If any song deserves to be cancelled, pulled and removed from playlists, it's probably Brown Sugar.
That guitar riff though...
Thank you, Adam. This is why I organised the Cancel Culture Club. Not to spoil records for C, and certainly not to ban them... but just to sneakily get people who are much smarter than me to explain my own feelings in ways that my own humble skills would be incapable of doing.
I've never been anti-American. I grew up on American culture - Spider-Man and Springsteen, Motown and Moonlighting. For much of my youth, I felt more American than I did British. And considering the sorry state of the UK at the moment, I don't believe we're in any state to judge.
This isn't an anti-American post then. It's just an anti-American idiots post. Because the lunatics appear to be taking over the asylum once more, and given recent events, nothing's going to bar their way. "God" help us all.
Last week, I bemoaned the fact that I came away from my recent Billy Bragg gig feeling ever so slightly short-changed, for which I blamed myself more than Billy. Afterwards, I was reminded of a Lloyd Cole lyric...
The Young Idealists Careering through the markets to the Mall Venturing that we could have it all Still supposing we could make a difference And then the markets fall And the heavens open And there's no synergy at all The synergy is broken So maybe now I'd take that wholesale revolution We were talking about Maybe now I'd take a future we can breathe in
...and once again, I felt like I was getting too old for all this shit: gigging, nightlife, being out in the world.
So when it came time for my second gig in less than a week, Half Man Half Biscuit at the same venue where Billy had left me wanting more, I found myself having another little existential crisis. It didn't help that I'd been out the night before to see Sam performing in a choir concert at Huddersfield Town Hall, and that I had to get up early the following morning for a football tournament that took up most of Saturday. Did I really want to spend my Friday evening standing on my own among a crowd of middle-aged men wearing T-shirts Mark Radcliffe would not approve of? Much as I love the Biscuit, I had serious second thoughts.
But I forced myself to go, and I'm glad I did. Because while I found it hard to connect with Billy's idealistic devotion this time round, Nigel Blackwell's cheeky Birkenhead cynicism was enough to banish the mid-life crisis for a couple of hours. As soon as he and his gang walked on stage to a singalong of Rhinestone Cowboy... it felt like I belonged.
Like Billy, Nigel is as entertaining between the tunes as when he's actually singing... unlike Billy, I never felt like I was failing to live up the expectations of the man on stage. Instead, he left me much to ponder...
Have you ever seen Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen and Dave Grohl in the same room?
Was that really Jodie Comer in the corner?
What do they call the sliding tray device used in overnight garages to pass things through to the cashier (or vice versa)?
The answer to that last one is a Chuckle Brother, in case it was going to keep you awake tonight.
