45s. For most of us, our entry into record collecting. Long gone now, except as collector's items and special editions. But there was something very special about the 45. If you were going to go to the effort to put one song on the turntable, then you were damn well going to give that song your attention. That's something today's youth has lost, and I'd argue the songs they cherish might never mean as much to them because of that loss.
Alyson was the only one of you brave enough to mention former Golden Earring member Jaap Eggermont's Stars On 45 by name...
...although Charity Chic went one worse by reminding us of Rotherham's answer to Stars On 45... Jive Bunny! Let's hope that's the last time they ever get mentioned on this blog.
A slightly more worthy suggestion came from The Swede, in honour of Jez...
And then came Martin, who's obviously now using the same lyrics search engine I do, because he almost filled up the entire comment's box with this lot...
Gomez's "Bubble Gum Years" Whiskey bottle and a 45, my dear Fountains of Wayne: "Number 45 Sunblock"(I'm not sure if Martin actually listened to that one - but it's not a real song.) Neil Sedaka and "Our Last Song Together": Scratchy worn out 45's, an echo on the radio The Hollies, "Long Cool Woman in a Black Dress": A pair of 45s made me open my eyes Blondie's "Bermuda Triangle Blues" begins Flight 45, last seen alive on the runway
Elbow's "Jesus is a Rochdale Girl" has Jesus is a Rochdale girl, and 45 CDs Meatloaf and "Rock and Roll Hero": Stacks of scratched up 45's and taught myself how to sing Barry bleedin' Manilow (!) and "The Old Songs" includes if all those plans I made don't melt the lady's heart, I'll put on the old 45's (Oy! Less of the 'bleeding'!)
Saint Etienne's "Home": Life seems so good, they're like the 45's when I dream I'm dreaming of you" (Can't find that anywhere on youtube.)
Bill Haley (and many others) and "Peppermint Twist": Well, meet me baby down at 45th Street, where the Peppermint Twisters meet" (Couldn't find that anywhere either so I linked to the version by Joey Dee & The Starliters.)
Repeat offenders Saint Etienne with "Teenage Winter": They'll never buy a Gibb Brothers record again, their old 45s gathering dust (Possibly my favourite SE song, that.)
Aussie proggers The Church and "The Time Being" includes I use a .45 to give them some stick
I'm going to stop there, I think. I'm getting obsessed.
Van Morrison - "Wild Children" opens with
"We were the War Children
Born 1945
When all the soldiers came marching home
Love looks in their eye..."
and FINALLY!
Mary Chapin Carpenter - "John Doe No. 24" (a beautiful song) starts with
"I was standing on this sidewalk
In 1945 in Jacksonville, Illinois
When asked what my name was there came no reply..."
Now, you may have noticed I've missed out some of your suggestions there. That's because, two years ago, on the event of my 45th birthday, I actually compiled My Top Ten 45 Songs. And here they are...
Tracey Emin, Trevor Howard and the Major from Fawlty Towers all came from Margate, though its most famous musical son is Mike Stock of Stock, Aitken & Waterman, a man about whom, the best I can say is simply this: at least he wasn't Pete Waterman. Fortunately, Margate has one other musical hero: Brian Fahey.
The police report stated that every year at Margate
The daisies grew a different shade of brown
And in Bob Geldof's Love Like A Rocket... a song which cheekily updates the story of Waterloo Sunset's Terry & Julie (I wonder what Ray Davies thought of that?) with a video which will NOT persuade you to give Bob your fookin' money... especially when Eric Clapton pops up.
Julie cries a lot but she tries to hide the tears
From the kids coming in from school
She's looking at a picture taken, Margate '66
Of Terry on the pier looking cool
She tries to remember the boy in the snap
But the baby's woken up from her afternoon nap
She runs a wrinkled hand through her tired hair
Then sighs and mutters something sounding close to despair
However, we come to Margate today to pay tribute to one of two men who immortalised the town in song, the one who sadly left us just last week...
RIP, Chas.
You can keep your Costa Brava!
While we're down in this neck of the woods, I figured we'd keep going south on the coast road. It's only about 60 miles or so... see you there next Friday.
These are Rabbit, formerly Rabbi. There are two of them for a very good reason. Here's a story I originally posted on Evil Facebook back in August 2015, when Sam was just under two years old...
Sam's favourite teddy is a large Nutbrown Hare from the Guess How Much I Love You book. His Uncle Adam bought it for him when he was very small and they've been pretty much inseparable ever since. If "Rabbi" isn't in Sam's cot when he goes to bed, there is much protesting. However, because of all the love he receives, Rabbi does occasionally need to go in the washing machine...
To solve the problem of Missing Rabbi, we bought a Spare Rabbi who we cunningly substitute for the real thing from time to time in the way Indiana Jones swaps the golden Aztec Fertility Idol for a bag of dust in the opening scene of Raiders... with care, subterfuge and split second precision.
This morning, such a substitution was required. So while I distracted Sam, mummy used the clever ploy of "giving Rabbi a cuddle" to do the swap, returning to Sam a clean and fresh Rabbi so she could sneak the other one off to the wash.
The boy took one look at his "returned" toy and without even a blink said simply: "New Rabbi!"
After that, we soon gave up the pretence of there being only one Rabbit and let Sam have them both. They're still his go-to toy, two and a half years later. I wonder how much longer they'll wield such power...
I still have my old Huggy Bear up on top of the bookcase in my office (missing a nose since my old dog Nip chewed it off when I was about 11).
It should come as no surprise then that Sam was overjoyed when I added this track to our in-car listening selection...
Say what you like about Chas 'n' Dave, but this is still a classic. Still haven't found any rabbit in Sainsbury's though. But I did see some oysters in Tesco the other week...
It was this or Scarborough Fair. And much as I love both Scarborough and Simon & Garfunkel, there's something about Scarborough Fair that represents folk music at its most twee. Call me a philistine, but I'd rather have lyrics that sing, "Behave yourself grandad, or you won’t be going..." than, "Parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme". Maybe when I compile my Top Ten Herb Songs...
See also Mussels of Margate, written by Kurt Weill. Seriously, you can't make stuff like that up.
The lead singer of American Music Club probably isn't the first person you'd expect to hear singing a song about Southend... maybe that's why it works so well. Told from the perspective of "just another ugly American melting in the heat"...
You said to me "You're from California And you're as dumb as can be" You said to me "Are you the Scarecrow, the Tin Man Or are you Dorothy?" You said to me "I'm beginning to think that you're A part of the enemy" You said to me "If I was drowning would you save me From Southend-on-Sea?"
OK, so Dungeness isn't strictly a seaside town, it's a headland with a beach, a nuclear power plant and Derek Jarman's cottage on it. But let's pretend it's a big holiday destination, shall we? This song is quite, quite lovely.
Gets many extra marks for mentioning Filey, because Filey is ace.
Maybe she could tell her I’ve still got her umbrella She prized it rather highly It saved her once in Filey It came on all torrential And therefore it’s essential
The band Luxembourg also had a song called Broadstairs but the internet hasn't ever heard of it.
To quote my old music blogging hero, JC, The Vinyl Villain, "the b-side (to Geraldine) is a rather lovely romantic song about one of the least romantic coastal towns on Planet Earth." I've never been to Saltcoats so I'll have to bow to his native knowledge.
My favourite seaside town (I may even be there as you read this); I can think of at least two people who read this blog who would probably have made this Number One. And who knows, they may well be right.
Why do political parties always hold their conferences in seaside towns? Is it just so the waster politicians can ride the donkeys wearing Kiss Me Quick hats? A scathing attack on the Liberal Party (SDP) of the late 80s, this is "somewhat" dated now, but it still sounds wonderful. And there's no mention of Nick Clegg, which is always a bonus.
They wore enamel badges of David Steel on their sleeves And "nuclear power no thanks", "Not sure" and "yes please!" And their faces were two fold And their teeth they were gold And they wore their pinstripe suits With a rip at the knee
I'm out tonight and can't decide Between Soviet hip or British pride
Songs about badgers, marrying Anita Dobson, that hair... Bryan May's crimes against cool are considerable. But it's possible to forgive him everything just by listening to the guitar solo on Brighton Rock, one of the best songs he ever wrote. Plus, Freddie sings a duet with himself, taking on both male and female vocals. The tale of a doomed holiday romance and the mums and wives who ruin it.
"Jenny will you stay? Tarry with me, pray Nothing e'er need come between us Tell me love what do you say?" "Oh no I must away, to my mum in disarray If my mother should discover how I spent my holiday It would be of small avail to talk of magic in the air I'll say farewell..."
Other Brighton belters include Upside Down On Brighton Beach by Shirley Lee and You're Not From Brighton by local lad Norman 'Fatboy Slim' Cook. See also New Brighton Promenade by The Boo Radleys, though I suspect that'll be the New Brighton in Merseyside.
So... those are my favourite Seaside Town Songs... where will you be wearing a knotted hanky on your head this summer?
As I said above, if you're looking for White Rabbits, click the Alice In Wonderland link. Here's a white hare instead. Don't give me any grief about hares not being rabbits.
Yes, the kookiness is starting to grate and she's yet to record anything else quite as exciting as Kiss With A Fist... but when I read that "551 people disliked this video beacuse (sic) they saw her waring (sic) earring (sic) that looks (sic) like "illuminati" sign", I was impressed. Particularly that the youtube commenter knew how to spell Illuminati.
Stephin Merritt at his most playful, from the mighty 69 (Love Songs).
1. Jenny Lewis & The Watson Twins - Rabbit Fur Coat
Just fantastic storytelling...
I was of poor folk
But my mother had a rabbit fur coat
And a girl of less character pushed her down the L.A. River
Hand over that rabbit fur coat
She put a knife to her throat
Hand over that rabbit fur coat
When my ma refused, the girl kicked dirt on her blouse
Stay away from my mansion house
Look, I know you were expecting Shut Up by Madness, but I just didn't have room for it. Call it #11. If you're wondering how this made the chart when that didn't, the simple answer is... I never fancied Suggs when I was 16.
Written by Joe 'Games People Play' South and originally recorded by Billy Joe Royal (no, me neither). You may be more familiar with the Kula Shaker version. I won't hold that against you.
The next time Morrissey says something designed to get the collective knickers in a twist, everyone should consider one of his most honest lyrical declarations...
Sweetness, sweetness I was only joking When I said I'd like to smash every tooth In your head
Oh ... sweetness, sweetness, I was only joking When I said by rights you should be Bludgeoned in your bed
Bigmouth strikes again And I've got no right to take my place With the Human race
One of my favourite Costello songs from his best album, Punch The Clock.
This town belongs to you and your tricks of confidence All the pavements for miles around are littered with your footprints Now every girl I get close to seems to be wearing your perfume And the clock strikes the letters of your name Both midnight and noon
I wish I'd never opened my mouth almighty...
1. Julian Cope - World, Shut Your Mouth
It may be flying in the face of fashion... but, beat this!
These are the songs I sing when I want someone to pipe down. Which one are you singing back at me right now?
