At last! I guilt-tripped Alyson into writing a guest post! And what a guest post it is too. One of my favourites. I almost feel like my work here is done...
As a frequent visitor to Rol’s blog, and as someone who had
been pressing Lynchie to offer up a guest post for many years (which he did
with aplomb and kick-started this series I think*), it was inevitable the
pressure would be on to come up with something myself. Blind panic set in, as
although I don’t mind sharing some dubious song choices over at my place, the
thought of doing so here was more than a tad disconcerting**.
(*Actually, it was JC who kicked us off... although Lynchie's post arrived synchronously to that. - Rol.)
(** I don't see why. Rarely a post goes by in which I don't share a dubious song choice. - Rol.)
After a few false starts I decided to get back to the host
himself and ask for an idea…, a prompt. If it all went horribly wrong, I could
blame him (no not really). A few years back I started writing an American Odyssey in Song, a series which was great fun to
put together but by the time I reached Delaware I was stumped, and so ended the
journey. Rol reminded me of that series and suggested a Scottish Odyssey
instead as a guest post idea. As our travelling habits have been seriously
curtailed this year by the pesky pandemic, and staycations are now the order of
the day, let’s get our kilts on and journey the length and breadth of this country I call home, in
song. (The songs are listed in no particular order.)
Oh yes, Ricky, having seen many boats yesterday on the
Caledonian Canal, it seems that’s just what many of us are doing at the moment
and they may well be on their way to the west coast. On a technicality they
won’t “pass through” many villages and towns but they may well stop off at
places like Ullapool which is as far as I’ve travelled out of
Inverness this year. Their Seafood Shack serves up award-winning street food
and if you want to try Lobster Thermidor for less than 18 quid, that’s where you’d head. Their
annual music festival called Loopallu (see what they did there) was cancelled
this year but let’s hope it will return in 2021.
But I’ve been stung a few times, so I don’t let no one in
No even belters!
DD returned from Glasgow recently after
spending a year down there working/having her heart broken. She generally fits
into any situation pretty well but during her first week she was seriously
struggling. Why? The banter in her new workplace was in the local dialect, and
it took her a while to tune in.
Gerry Cinnamon is a recent discovery for me but if you want
to hear someone sing with a Glaswegian accent, this is your man. The girl in
the song is a belter, different from the rest but he’s scared
to let down his guard for fear of being hurt. Indeed Gerry, we’ve all been
there.
Anyone familiar with 1960s television schedules will
remember we were inflicted with The White Heather Show on a weekly basis. All
very stereotypically Scottish what with the tartan and the traditional songs. A
bit before my time but the host was a favourite son of Scotland, Andy Stewart
from Arbroath, famous for its “smokies”. These fishy delicacies are
now geographically protected foodstuffs, with production limited to within
4 km of Arbroath.
By some strange quirk of fate, breakfast DJ Simon
Mayo discovered Andy’s novelty song Donald Where’s Your Troosers in
1989 and helped it get to the top of the charts.This could be a difficult listen I grant you, but
bear with it, as Andy was a great impressionist as well as a singer/comedian
and his attempt at mimicking Elvis (at 1:45) is still really funny. For any
true Scotsman, falling
at a ball in a slippery hall could be quite dangerous.
Most of us of a certain age will remember the film Gregory’s
Girl. It was set in and around a state secondary school in Cumbernauld. The New Town
(designated in 1955) featured heavily in the film and during my only visit to
Cumbernauld, I spotted the big clock in the local shopping centre where Gregory
was due to meet his date for the evening. In a roundabout way the date ends up
being with Susan, played by pop pixie Claire Grogan from the band Altered Images. She was definitely on
a roll that year and her character Susan even ended up with the boy of her dreams, the awkward and gangly Gregory, much
to the envy of his socially inept friends. For them the die was cast, it was Caracas or bust.
My first visit to Loch Lomond was last year
when we went to visit DD in her new abode. It was a bit of a shock to the
system as unlike our own Loch Ness, which is on my doorstep, it is serviced by
giant carparks and shopping malls. Understandable I suppose it being so close
to Glasgow, but just hadn’t expected it.
Celtic rock band Runrig hail from the Isle of Skye (also
mentioned in Claire and Andy’s songs) but back in 1991 they performed a massive
concert at Loch Lomond in front of a crowd of biblical proportions. They had a
bit of a cult following back then and when they sang the traditional song Loch
Lomond, interspersed with lines in their native Gaelic, it sent shivers down
the spine.
Ho, ho mo leannan
Ho mo leannan bhoidheach
Lead singer of the time Donnie Munro taught my husband art
at school in the 1970s and when he’d told the class he was involved with a band
that played a kind of Gaelic/Celtic rock, they were highly sceptical. He
certainly proved them all wrong.
We’re off to Aberdeen now, a city I am
really familiar with as I spent nearly half my life there or thereabouts. It
probably still is the Oil Capital of Europe but with the black stuff being bad
news nowadays, it will have to reinvent itself in the next decade or so I
imagine. I still feel bad when people talk about the awfulness of the 1980s,
what with high unemployment and social unrest – In Aberdeen we’d never had it
so good and it did feel as if the streets were paved with gold. Our football team even
won the European Cup Winners Cup (it’s painful on the ears but there was even a song about it.
As for Danny Wilson, they were short-lived but left us with
some great songs (Mary's Prayer). Their lead singer Gary
Clark often used to head up to Aberdeen from his home in Dundee which is how
this song came about. It seems we had people we knew in common and I feel sure I must have been in
his company at some point during my student years. Of course, back then he
wasn’t Gary Clark from Danny Wilson but simply that guy from Dundee who
was up for the weekend. How it goes.
It’s not even a real place but back in 1985, son of
Edinburgh Mike Scott wrote these fine lyrics. Brigadoon is a
miraculously blessed village that rises out of the mists every hundred years,
for only a day – An MGM, Gene Kelly/Cyd Charisse version of Scotland, but
whenever I’m feeling a bit negative I try to remember Mike’s words. It sums up
how we’d all like to be in life, but not always easy to get into that mindset,
especially at the moment. Note to self: Must try harder.
I had really enjoyable wee holiday in Dundee a
couple of years back and now think of it fondly as the city of Jam, Jute,
Journalism and the Party Fears Two. We sampled the jam, visited an old jute
mill, and took in a DC Thomson exhibition showcasing those great characters
Dennis the Menace, Oor Wullie and Desperate Dan.
So what if this party fears two?
The alcohol loves you while turning you blue
View it from here from closer to near
Awake me
Another great character from Dundee was the
sadly-taken-too-young Billy MacKenzie of the Associates. Once seen never
forgotten and those soaring high tenor vocals were a joy to listen to. The
lyrics apparently came about after watching two girls trying to get into a
party – they were smashing windows and attempting to kick the door in with their
stiletto heels, so were christened the Party Fears Two!
There is a large park in Edinburgh to the
south of the city centre called The Meadows and last time we were there I
noticed a hospital bordering it on one side. It’s called Simpsons and I remembered that all five Bay City Rollers had
been born there (too much time spent reading teen mags in the 1970s). Was there
ever a group of lads less well equipped to become tartan teen
sensations? It is well documented that despite their global success they
ended up with none of the spondulicks. The Beatles had a mania, and so did
these five boys
from Edinburgh – Who would have thought it possible?
Yeah, we sang shang-a-lang
And we ran with the gang
Doin’ doo-op-dooby-doo-i
You might think we all prance around in full highland dress
up here, showcasing our very best versions of the Gay Gordons or the Dashing
White Sergeant, but you’d be wrong. Last time I was at a wedding it was
Shang-A-Lang that got everyone up on the dance floor, and why not.
The Proclaimers have written some great songs but this one
is still my favourite, their love letter to Leith, a now very
gentrified district in the north of Edinburgh, and the place of their birth.
I’m certainly not a fan of Hibernian FC but seeing the crowd on the
terraces sing this
song is something that always brings a tear to my eye.
While I’m worth my room on this earth
I will be with you
While the Chief, puts sunshine on Leith
I’ll thank Him for His work
And your birth and my birth
Where’s that box of tissues?
Thanks again, Alyson. A lot of time and effort went into that. I just feel bad that it stopped you writing your own blog for a couple of weeks.
The doors are still open on this feature, folks. Let me know if you'd like to contribute.
The most famous of all murdered pop stars. The Cranberries give a voice to his killer, Mark David Chapman, but their sympathies remain with the Walrus.
I never quite got Chumbawamba's message here, other than that - in their opinion - famous pop stars are hypocrites for getting involved in charity appeals. (By their calculations, Live Aid, Band Aid and Sport Aid raised less than half of Michael Jackson's "personal amassed fortune", "or about the same as the world spends on arms every two hours, forty minutes".
Most of the lyrics just do what it says in the title, but they do nail Cliff Richard to a cross towards the end... and there's another version where they do the same to John Lydon, for balance.
Poor old Rick Astley. Back in the late 80s, I hated him in his role as SAW poster-boy, but I've developed a weird respect for him over the years. Even Nick Lowe feels bad about writing these lines in All Men Are Liars now...
Well do you remember Rick Astley?
He had a big fat hit it was ghastly
He said I’m never gonna give you up or let you down
Here's Leonard turning the gun on himself... in reaction to his own critics.
"This song is for my critics and for my judges and for those who give marks to us everywhere, who evaluate our performance whether it is in the courtroom or the cloakroom or the bedroom. This is for the judges."
Paul Heaton's trick is to get someone with a much sweeter voice to sing his most poisonous lines, hence Jacqui Abbott's the one who gives voice to this hugely topical song (even more so today than when it was written 5 years ago) about the perils of Little Britain's fake-nostalgic jingoism which ends up making a figurehead of Mr. Collins, esquire.
Simon & Julia don't actually want the notorious Libertine to drop dead. This is more a comment on media vultures and a public over-obsessed with celebrity death. Apparently.
1. Chris T-T - Dreaming Of Injured Pop Stars
A similar sentiment powers Chris T-T's somewhat dated (pop-reference wise) yet still ESSENTIAL Number One (sorry, CC). Always raises a smile in this house anyway...
The bit about the Stereophonics is my favourite. Poor old Kelly Jones.
Got any pop star hit lists of your own? Share with the group.
Picture this - a Sunday morning without any answers to Saturday Snapshots. No need to Call Me OR go Atomic... they're here!
I'm going to call this one a draw between Charity Chic and Lynchie, because even though Lynchie got half a point more than CC, Charity Chic was typing his answer to Number 4 at the same time as Alyson, who beat him to it by seconds. (To be fair, he then beat her to Number 2 by seconds. What a close match!) Plus, CC got Number 9 and Number 5, which were definitely the hardest to identify this week.
Lynchie called this "one of the most horrible songs to grace the pop charts", but it's one I remember Terry Wogan playing in my youth (with his own little wink as he did it) and I'll always have a special fondness for it, despite... or perhaps because of... the supreme cheese. I even found myself listening to a whole album of Wink's earnest talky songs the other day...
"And friends, the story is true. I know... I was that soldier."
9. Put your tongue between your lips and blow - you'll be a star by tomorrow!
