Self-Help For Cynics #8: Monkey Mind

They prosecuted some poor sucker in these United States

For teaching that man descended from the apes

They coulda settled that case without a fuss or fight

If they'd seen me chasin' you, sugar, through the jungle last night

They'da called in that jury and a one two three said

Part man, part monkey, definitely

Bruce Springsteen - Part Man, Part Monkey

The idea of a monkey mind dates back to ancient Buddhist philosophy, where it refers to “a state of restlessness, capriciousness, and lack of control in one's thoughts”. The idea has evolved over the centuries, being bastardised and misappropriated as all ideas are, and these days it’s hard to find a clear definition that everyone agrees on. That’s what I’m finding, the more I read into mental health, much of it is theory backed up by evidence, but it’s all down to interpretation. Some sources tell me the monkey brain is just the amygdala, those tiny brain nuts I talked about last time, while others claim that the monkey holds sway over a much bigger portion of our mind. 

He takes me on a walk almost everyday

And boy does he have a lotta mean things to say

He takes me by the hand and then he starts to play

His little monkey game that never goes away

The Bobby Lees – Monkey Mind

Here’s what the wonderfully named “American Institute of Stress” has to say…

Our brain can be separated into three sections – our lizard brain, our monkey brain, and our human brain. The “lizard brain” is found at the base of the brain, and contains the cerebellum and brain stem. Lizards only have these elements of the brain, which controls our most basic instincts. The next part of the brain, the “monkey brain” includes the majority of our tissue, and controls more complex tasks as well as emotions. Most mammals lead with their “monkey brain”, which is fueled by our most basic responses to fear and desire.

The most advanced part of the brain is the “human brain”, which consists of the outer layer, surrounding the “monkey brain”. This area allows for logical, emotionless thought, as well as delayed gratification. It is by using our “human brain” that we are able to think through our responses, rather than just reacting. But, when we are faced with threats to our system, we don’t have time to stop and analyze what’s going on. During these times we are glad to have our “lizard” and “monkey” brains to get us to safety, through our fight or flight response.

For the basis of simplicity, I’m going to let sleeping lizards lie and deal only with the monkey, since it’s that little critter most sources seem to point the finger at in terms of jamming up our heads with stressful chimp-chat.

I woke up with my monkey mind raging

Going around all the things you were saying

Like let's put it on ice, it's not like we were married

You said you don't want things to get too heavy

Ella Hooper - Monkey Mind

Remember, the monkey mind is a very useful part of brain, because by protecting us from danger, it keeps us alive. Even when it’s maintaining our place in the monkey community rather than saving us from wild bears, it’s doing so because it thinks we have more chance of surviving as social beings than as loners. 

Echo & The Bunnymen - Monkeys

And that is the Number One job of our brain, because if we’re not alive, we can’t do any of the other stuff our brain wants to do, such as pondering the mysteries of the universe, or writing blog posts that nobody reads or finding obscure songs from the past that everybody's forgotten...

Douglas - Monkey Song

In the 21st Century though, the monkey can start to think everything is a threat. And that’s when we get hijacked by the monkey’s screaming, anxiety takes hold… and our mental health starts to suffer. 

Pixies - Monkey Gone To Heaven

So how do we deal with that? Paradoxically, some scientists believe that the answer is NOT To try to deal with it. To accept it… welcome it, even. We’ll get onto that. For now, the easiest first step is merely to understand it. Understand that there is a part of your brain that is programmed to panic purely as a way to keep you alive. Understand that it struggles nowadays to tell the difference between genuine immediate threats and vague, wishy-washy might-but-probably-won’t-ever-happen threats. Think of how many times the fire alarm has gone off at your place of work. And how many times has the building actually burnt down? (Unless you supplied the matches.) The monkey mind can’t tell the difference between a building on fire and a weekly test of the alarm. Once you realise that panic, anxiety and all kinds of symptoms of mental health are just the result of parts of your primitive brain doing stuff it probably doesn’t need to do anymore – once you realise that it’s not you, it’s the monkey – then you can begin to separate yourself from your thoughts. Psychologists call this defusion. Cognitive defusion – and by employing this strategy, you can defuse the bombs in your mind. Or so they tell me. Well, it’s got to be worth a try, hasn’t it? There's nothing wrong with hoping...

Try and be kind to Mr Humphries in Room 5

He gets grumpy trying to keep hope alive

And though the well is dried up

He won't give or shut up

He just keeps hoping

His advice to the young

'Always leave 'em wanting more

You can't calm the savage beast

But you can make him less of a bore.

The heart it don't need

Brave words or deeds

It just keeps hoping...'

Not that I want to give monkeys a bad name. After all, as Andre Williams reminds us, monkeys are actually a lot better creatures than human beings...