TV On The Radio #4: Buck Rogers

Buck Rogers was created in 1929 as a comic strip hero who eventually translated into radio and movie serials. However, he is best remembered as the star of the late 70s TV show Buck Rogers In The 25th Century starring Gil Gerard and Erin Grey. In this show, Buck is a NASA pilot who's thrown 500 years into the future, arriving in a world where everyone wears sexy jump-suits and the robots are really annoying. And I mean, really annoying...

In the "You Learn Something New Everyday" Department: Twiki, the really annoying robot above, was actually voiced by Mel 'Bugs Bunny' Blanc.

Music in the 25th Century will also be particularly annoying...

Kipp Lennon - Suspension (Theme from Buck Rogers in the 25th Century)

The Splash Band - Buck Rogers

...so Buck will probably listen to quite a few oldies on whatever kind of listening device 1979 creatives imagined we'd be using in 500 years time... I doubt they predicted Spotify.

Let's start with a band named after characters from a science fiction board game, with a song about making a sandwich...

Been out all night, I needed a bite

I thought I'd put a record on

I reached for the one with the ultra-modern label

And wondered where the light had gone

It had a futuristic cover, lifted straight from Buck Rogers

The record was so black it had to be a con

The auto changer switched as I filled my sandwich

And futuristic sounds warbled off and on

The Human League - The Black Hit Of Space

Next up, someone who's no stranger to name-dropping popular TV shows in his lyrics, the mighty Gil Scott Heron, with a song about Reagan's re-election campaign...

Ah yes, they're off and running again. The campaign trail

And doesn't he look like himself?

Back in the saddle again

Roy Rogers and Buck Rogers

Rutherford B. Hayes and Gabby Hayes

Marlon Perkins and Carl Perkins

Gil Scott Heron - Re-Ron

And then we have the Bloodhound Gang...

It ain't your mind you're givin' me a piece of 

As it don't take Einstein to know that's just obscene but 

It's been Buck Rogers' time since I hit other than rock bottom 

The Bloodhound Gang - I'm The Least You Could Do

After that, I'm ready for a Complete Meltdown... and lots of 80s references in this one!

Robotic vision, I'm Terminator 

I'm from the future, I've come to get yer 

I'm Knight Industries Two Thousand 

In my A-team van, aroused and 

I'm building boxes in the back of the shop 

I am Buck Rogers and 

I'm not gonna stop 

I'm weighing spuds, I'm 

Thinking nuclear fission 

I save the world with my robotic vision

Complete Meltdown - Robotic Vision

Next up, George's favourite rappers...

You dress like Buck Rogers, you got a bell-end for a face

Lovely.

Goldie Lookin' Chain - Worms

Then how about some Brazilian post-punk from the 80s?

Ness - Adeus Buck Rogers

Or a Dre who never became a Dr?

Mac Dre - Black Buck Rogers

Or some "Soulless Californian Indie Rock" (their words, not mine)?

Pencil Pusher - Buck Rogers (At the Movies)

Or some Finnish surf-rock? (I imagine it's pretty cold, surfing in Finland.)

The Verticals - Buck Rogers

Or... erm... this?

The Hemingway Solution - Buck Rogers

I'm not sure The Hemingway Solution is a particularly memorable band name. And I like Hemingway! This, on the other hand...

Techno Squid Eats Parliament - Buck Rogers

And that's before we even get to the Namesakes...

Buck Rogers - Crazy Baby

Buck Rogers ‎- Die Schallen

This week's raison d'etre obviously comes from Feeder though, a Welsh indie band with just enough welly to keep them out of the landfill, and still be filling medium-sized venues almost 20 years after they formed. This is their biggest hit, and definitely their best song...

Product Placement Friday #7: Fray Bentos

This week, I'm handing over the responsibility of Product Placement Friday to George... thanks for giving me a day off, old pal. 

Since my return from the freezing cold of Dundee, I have spent many hours sitting in the sun here at the farm, gazing at the Serra and trying to come up with an idea for this series.

First attempt: Hula Hoops, but a hula hoop seems to be that plastic thing that some people shake about their hips, and even to me a song referring to jumping through a hula hoop of fire simply can not refer to the potato-ish product I was thinking of.

Second attempt: Angel Delight, but this led to songs that I’m quite sure had nothing to do with that peculiar powdered desert (one that we were never allowed to have as children despite “everyone else in my class has it for their pudding”) and also included band names, song titles and lyrics that were eye-wateringly crude.

One more go. Result! So here it is, songs that mention Fray Bentos (that was never allowed in our house thankfully, a steak pie in a tin, or was it steak and kidney, that’s just disgusting).

What better way to start than with Ian Anderson (he of Jethro Tull), from the belated follow-up to the Thick As A Brick album:

Smooth clockwork running motors hum while barren Madge prepares hot dinner

Fray Bentos pie: always a winner

Ian Anderson - Cosy Corner

Next up is Scott Lavene, this might appeal to more people than my first choice (although the estuary-London accent might be a turn-off). It’s an 8 minute listen but very enjoyable

So on this day, he brought around two bottles of gin,

Four bottles of wine, some Fray Bentos Pies

Six tins of cheap Irish stew, a packet of Ginger Nuts, and a loaf of shit bread

Scott Lavene - Broke

Asbo Slipz have an entire song devoted to the steak-pie-in-a-tin yuckiness;

Other pies, well they're for other guys,

Not bad, but I won't compromise

I need the pies that come within

Blue tins with hard to  open lids

Built to survive a nuclear

Bomb and withstand a hundred years

Sat in my kitchen cupboard I've no no fears

With Fray Bentos on my side

Asbo Slipz - Fray Bentos (song for Bav)

The Macc Lads have a song that mentions Fray Bentos. I have not knowingly heard anything by this lot, and after looking at the lyrics I decided to omit the song, I don’t know if it’s tongue-in-cheek satire or just offensive. Anyway, I didn’t like it. 

Unlike the next and last one, by Goldie Lookin Chain. 

And these lyrics are not for the faint-hearted, but I thought this was hilarious

'Til someone said 'oi wanker, what you doing?'

Threw me out, I raised an objection

With corned  beef still stuck to my erection

So what, fuck 'em, I don't give a toss

I'm going home with a Fray Bentos

Thanks again to George for saving me some time this week... although that didn't stop me from having a look to see if I could find anything he'd missed. Here are The Wheezing Dogs from late 70s Canada. Their lead singer was called... Fray Bentos.

The Wheezing Dogs - I Don't Like You

And here's some German Trip Hop...

The Bad Examples -  Das Stück, Das Sie Fray Bentos Nannten

(It translates as The Piece They Called Fray Bentos.)

Fortunately, that was all that I could find.

Celebrity Jukebox #77: Gary Lineker

Sam turned on Match of the Day yesterday morning and we watched 20 minutes of commentary-free highlights that even he found boring. Everyone on the show has come out in support of Gary, and good on 'em. And good on Gary for speaking his mind on the fascist rhetoric of this callous, out-of-touch, out-of-control Tory government.

I said I wasn't going to do any more celebrity jukeboxes about people who were still alive, but I reckon Gary's got a good few decades left in him (he may well outlive me) even if he has to survive without his BBC salary. So in his honour... here's Goldie Lookin' Chain.

I want to be like Gary Lineker, that would be sweet

Be on Match Of The Day with all the crisps I can eat

Goldie Lookin' Chain - I Wanna Be Like

And what does Weller have to say? Erm, Martin Weller, that is...

Power of the Kings

The Fossils, the Filberts

Led by the Tinkerman

Lineker can't disguise his joy

Martin Weller - Foxes

(I don't really understand that one, being that I know very little about the foot-ball.)

Of course, the obvious Lineker reference comes in this...

But I still see that tackle by Moore 

And when Lineker scored

Bobby belting the ball, and Nobby dancing

Baddiel, Skinner & The Lightning Seeds - Three Lions

However, today's winner comes from this bunch, an Americana band from Minneapolis, probably the last people you'd expect to be singing the praises of Gary... well, apart me, that is.

I have a brother like Gary Lineker

Put it past you like salt on vinegar all the time

He'd do it all the time

Go, Gary, Go! Don't you back down, boy.

The United Kingdom of Song #29: Aberdare

Today we stop off in the South Wales town of Aberdare, which I found mentioned by name in two fine tunes from Welsh bands...

Mclusky - Collagen Rock

And one of those bands got legs like you

And one of them got the stare

And one of those bands got found I heard

In a hole in Aberdare

Goldie Lookin Chain - Half Man Half Machine

Now I've reached it, I'm finally there

Like Terminator being filmed in Aberdare

So alone, when people stop and stare

Like C3PO but with pubes and hair

Welsh rap - can't beat that... can we?

Just down the road from Aberdare is the former coal mining village of Cwmaman, birthplace of muso-irking indie band The Stereophonics. (Or the Stereophonies as Muso-Prime, Mark Radcliffe, likes to call them.)

I can see why some people have a problem with the Stereophonics. They starter out as lyrically intriguing Welsh indie storytellers, but rapidly went a bit L.A. when it became clear they could have bigger hits by making their stories more generic and widescreen. 

That first album though... Word Gets Around... that's still a favourite of mine. Great little small town stories set to timeless indie guitars. And all those songs, although it never gets mentioned by name, were written about the band's experiences growing up... in Aberdare. They became much less interesting once they left their hometown behind.

Standing at the bus stop with my shopping 

In my hands when I'm overhearing elderly 

Ladies as the rumours start to fly you can 

Hear them in the school yard, in the scrap yard 

In the chip shop, in the phone box, in the pool hall at 

The shoe stall every corner turned around...

It started with a school girl who was 

Running running home to her mam and 

Dad told them she was playing in the 

Change room of her local football side they 

Said tell us again so she told them again 

They said tell us the truth, they found it hard 

To believe, 'cause he taught our Steve, he 

Even trained me, taught Uncle John who's a

Father of three

But it only takes one tree to make 

A thousand matches 

Only takes one match to burn 

A thousand trees 

My Top Ten Songs About Prince

It's been a year since he died and I still haven't quite come to terms with it. I accepted Bowie's death, I knew Leonard wasn't long for this world. George was a shock, but not entirely. Prince though...

Of all the artists we lost last year, Prince was the one I felt the hardest. For about a month after his death, I listened to little else but his back catalogue on repeat. He was one of the biggest superstars of my life. Many of the others had been recording long before I was born, but Prince started making music in my lifetime, created some of the most amazing records I ever heard... and then was taken far too soon. I wanted to honour that again, but since I've already compiled My Top Ten Prince Songs, here's the next best thing...


10. The Bloodhound Gang - The Bad Touch

This one again. Sorry about that.

It's just, they're (dreaming) of doing "the kind of stuff only Prince would sing about"...

9. Jesus Jones - Right Here Right Now

It did seem in the early 90s like the world might well be changing for the better. When Jesus Jones wrote this, they proclaimed Bob Dylan's dream was coming true...

I saw the decade in, when it seemed 
The world could change at the blink of an eye
And if anything
Then there's your Sign o' the Times

So... did the world wake up from history?

Did it heck as like.

8. Goldie Lookin' Chain - Guns Don't Kill People, Rappers Do

Witty Welsh rap. What's not to love?

Guns don't kill people rappers do,
From Bristol Zoo to B&Q,
I want to rap, I want to rhyme
Heard it in a song now I'm into gun crime,
Its a sign of the times like Prince changin his name,
Gotta have a shooter to be in the rap game,
Like Michael Ryan about to snap,
Guns don't kill people its just rap!

7. Missy Elliott - Work It

This is probably the first time I've featured Missy Elliott here, but I am a fan in small doses. I particularly like this one: always impressed by her ability to rap backwards. Wonder how she does that live?

You know Missy feel supa dupa
Prince couldn't get me change my name, papa
Kunta Kinte a slave again, no sir
Picture black sayin', "Oh, yessa, massa"

6. Beck - Debra

Beck's whole Midnite Vultures album was a huge departure from his earlier work and wears its Prince influence proudly. A lot of artists have been influenced by Prince musically, but this song also shows huge lyrical influence. It could be the b-side to Raspberry Beret. Speaking of which...

5. Clint Boon Experience - Not Enough Purple, Too Much Grey

I'll just slip this one in here and leave you to decide whether it's about Prince or not. It certainly sums up the post-Prince world to me.

4. Hot Chip - Down With Prince

I'm not always the biggest Hot Chip fan, but how can I resist when they channel the purple one?

3. Eminem - Without Me

Eminem, the self-proclaimed "worst thing since Elvis Presley", rarely has a positive word to say about any other artist (except, maybe, Dr. Dre). But while he cheerfully puts the boot into NSYNCH, Limp Bizkit and Moby in this track, he really can't bring himself to say anything bad about Prince, using him instead as a comparison for how long Marshall Mathers spent writing songs before he got his break.

2. Smog - Prince, Alone In The Studio

Bill Callahan's epic captures better than anything what made Prince a superstar. He was a perfectionist. He lived for his music, more than just about any other artist we've had in popular music. Not all of that music was perfect, but it was his life. More than food, more than sex, more than anything else... music was what mattered to him.

1. Prince - My Name Is Prince

And he is funky.

Of course, the irony of this song was: very soon after, he stopped calling himself Prince and changed his name to an unpronounceable symbol just to piss Warner Brothers off. We all had to call him TAFKAP for the next eight years. But he was always Prince in our hearts.



Goodnight sweet Prince. I Wish You Heaven.