I never see much point in writing a blog post for Christmas Day - I'm sure you've all got far better things to do with your time than read my inane ramblings. Still, I would like to thank you all for putting up with this drivel for another year. You're a very special bunch. I hope you have the Christmas you deserve.
Here are some Christmas songs I'm not yet sick of, starting with Rhett Miller's band, The Old 97s, who made a surprising guest appearance in last year's Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special on Disney+.
If you act nicely through the night And don't jump on your bed Santa comes with sugar plums And hurls them at your head
But if you're on his naughty list He shoots missiles at your toes He might just roast your chestnuts With his powerful flamethrower
They also do a song with Kevin Bacon, because who wouldn't want to do a song with Kevin Bacon if they got the chance?
BBC Radio Scotland DJ Ian Anderson plays Australian songwriter Paul Kelly's How To Make Gravy every year at this time. It's about a convict writing a letter home to his family at Christmas and it's become a firm favourite.
Now here's his Bobness with his madcap cover of Mitch Miller's festive tune from 1960...
Andy Burrows & Tom Smith made one of my favourite Christmas albums in 2011. The post-relevant NME gave it 1/10 which makes it a winner in my book.
Finally, the best Christmas song ever written by The Handsome Family...
Followed soon after by Lynchie, who went all weird on us...
Primer mi carucha (Chevy '39) Going to El Monte Legion Stadium Pick up on my weesa (she is so divine) Helps me stealing hub caps Wasted all the time
The
above are the opening lyrics to "Dog Breath, in the Year of the Plague"
by The Mothers Of Invention. The vocals are stupendous, especially
Nelcy Walker's soprano voice backed by Ray Collins & Roy Estrada.
This track led me to purchase "Cruising with Ruben & the Jets" - an
earlier Mothers' album which has some of the best doo-wop songs ever
recorded.
Lynchie's second suggestion was a bit more down-to-earth... and surely a shoe-in for this week's winner as it comes from one of my favourite albums...
A friend of mine became a father last night When we spoke in his voice I could hear the light Of the skies and the rivers the timberwolf in the pines And that great jukebox out on Route 39
Then again, much as I love The Boss, it's only two weeks since he last claimed the top spot in this countdown. Would I really give it to him again?
Our Canadian correspondent, Douglas McLaren, was pretty sure I would...
Darn. Got beaten to the Boss, which I am guessing is the "shoe-in". Oh
well. Though Valentine's Day is (in my opinion) the better song,
Springsteen's "Stand On It" is a rollickin' great-balls-of-fire b-side
belter that also refers to Route 39.
Nope. Not this week, Douglas. What else have you got for me?
A few other offerings as outside chances. For starters, there is last
week's poster boys, UB40, with "Hold Your Position, Mk3". Not the
biggest UB40 fan, but that one sits in the record collection. Lyrics
mention "39 Acker Tree, Frontline"...not sure if that is an address or
what?
Hardly a desirable residence, by the sounds of it.
I feel I should mention Canada's Own Gordon Lightfoot again
this week, as his offering for "40" went down fighting. The song "Drink
Yer Glasses Empty". A typically Lightfoot song, semi-autobiographical I
suppose given that he was in fact born in 1938, but timeless
considering the world today:
Better drink yer glasses empty now It's time to rise and shine There's one less cause in the world To be leaving for It was back in 39 When I was one year old Sitting by the backyard fence And the world had turned so cold...
Another
one that actually sits in the collection since I picked up a vinyl copy
at a charity shop, but I am not actually all that fond of myself
(outside chance perhaps?) is World Party, "The Ballad of The Little
Man". The Latin Teacher in me appreciates the Classical allusion in the
lyrics, though:
He's an animal but he thinks he's God Gets him mixed up with him And we're all at the mercy Of this little man within He was doing fine in 39 Thank God he did not win He kept playing on his fiddle As he watched old Rome cave in...
Well, we crossed the state line about 6: 39 And we saw the sign that said, "Twine Ball exit, fifty miles" Oh, the kids were so happy they started singing "99 Bottles Of Beer On The Wall" for the twenty-seventh time that day...
It
reminds me of my summer vacations as a kid. Every last one of them.
And at least by mentioning in now it pre-empts its obvious chances of
being a take-all winner in 12 weeks time when number 27 comes up.
Yeah, that's the winne... oh, no, sorry, it isn't. Nice try though.
Who else do we have? Ah, George...
Of course Spanish Bombs will not be featuring.........
Well, it will be featuring, George. It just won't be winning. Nothing against Mr. Strummer and co. I'm just not cool enough to worship them in quite the same way many other venerable bloggers do.
Spanish songs in Andalucia The shooting sites in the days of '39 Oh, please, leave the vendanna open Fredrico Lorca is dead and gone Bullet holes in the cemetery walls The black cars of the Guardia Civil Spanish bombs on the Costa Rica I'm flying in a DC 10 tonight
Next up was Rigid Digit, with three fine suggestions...
A beautiful ballad where Kelly shows that love songs don’t just have to be about the young ones…
That is pretty special. Thanks, Deano.
And you all for playing, as ever. Before we get onto this week's winner (as immidiately identified by Martin, and seconded by Deano), here's a few more offerings from my hard-drive...
Sippin' Shirley Thompson doesn't care She's 39 and feelin' fine and not much up to goin' anywhere Her husband is a bible salesman and at 39 his hair fell out She said there's not a hair between him and the heaven that he talks about
All good songs, but the songs from our teenage years often leave the biggest impression, don't they? And that's certainly the case with this tune from Queen's A Night At The Opera album, a favourite of mine was I was 15 (even though it was released 12 years earlier). I never had much of an idea what the song was about, I just thought it was a pretty tune and Brian does a good job on vocals. Iffypedia reveals the lyrics go back to Brian's days as an astrophysicist...
The song tells the tale of a group of space explorers who embark on what
is, from their perspective, a year-long voyage. Upon their return,
however, they realise that a hundred years have passed, because of the time dilation effect in Einstein's special theory of relativity, and the loved ones they left behind are now all dead or aged.
