Friday 7 September 2018

The United Kingdom of Song #1: Huddersfield



Welcome to a new Friday feature in which I drive round the British Isles and find a song for every place I stop. It's a little bit like Alyson's American Road Trip series without all the fascinating research and anecdote. Also, where Alyson looks at America state by state, I'll be visiting towns and villages, often off the beaten track, and probably won't stop at any big cities. (That way, if Alyson ever wants to do an equivalent county by county trip around the UK, I won't have stolen her thunder.)

Anyway, I thought I'd begin in my own home town of Huddersfield. Its most famous musical connection is that the Sex Pistols played their last UK gigs here back in the punk era before that all fell apart for them. Famous Huddersfieldians include Sir Patrick Stewart and Jodie Whittaker (so both a Star Trek captain AND a Dr. Who come from my home town), plus James Mason and Harold Wilson. Apparently Roger Moore lived round her for a while (giving us a Bond too!) - and Bryan Adams' mum originated from the town, before deciding to seek a better life in Canada. Musically, the best we have to offer are Billy Currie from Ultravox and Visage, Roy Castle, Evile, and my favourite poet, Simon Armitage, who led short-lived, much-missed local band The Scaremongers.

Oh, and as I've previously written about, Morrissey had a spooky encounter here.

Songs that mention Huddersfield are very thin on the ground though. It's not a name that trips off the tongue or easily rhymes with anything, and most songwriters are a bit lazy that way. The only two references I could find are this...

Cabbage - Gibraltar Ape (they're from just over the Pennines in Tameside)

I wanna be free as a Gibraltar child
Drunk at fourteen on pints of mild
Ignoring preachers, in padded tiles
(Steel-toed caps that sink into the shins)
Instead I'll pass through Huddersfield
To muster out the change and courage I can yield
I'm young again, waiting out the backfield
(We're not spending any of your time)
 

And this...

A "comedy" b-side written about the band's manager, Rod Smallwood, who left Huddersfield to live in L.A. No idea why. It appears he wasn't very happy there.

Life in a city living in L.A.
Is a long way from Huddersfield town
The back of the Rainbow's a long way from heaven
But that's where he get's his pork pie
Limos and ladies they're driving him queasy
Rugby and cricket's unknown
Baseball and football they're making him lazy
Your fan club says "Rodney come home"

As Iron Maiden songs go, this is pretty easy on the ears, but be warned: Rodney raps in the middle.

Yes, this song is in my record collection, and I've probably listened to it more than most other Iron Maiden songs I own. But its comedic appeal probably doesn't extend much beyond Castle Hill (as pictured above)…



Please let me know if you're aware of any other songs that mention Huddersfield.

Next Friday, I'll be driving 242 miles down the M1 to a small Buckinghamshire town to check out its Lost Property office.



16 comments:

  1. Excellent idea for a series Rol - and I for one would love to see Alyson take on a tour of UK cities after she completes her American Road trip. Full marks to Cabbage for rhyming Huddersfield with '..courage I can yield..' Good work fellas.
    The only instance of your home town cropping up in my own collection that I can think of on is hidden away on the 2016 'Island Years' 4CD set by Ultravox! (John Foxx's Ultravox! not the later, Midge Ure fronted version that traded minus the exclamation mark). Disc 4, 'Rare Retro', contains live versions of 'My Sex' and 'The Man Who Dies Everyday', recorded at the Huddersfield Polytechnic in 1977.
    Looking forward to discovering where your travels take you next.

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    1. Huddersfield Polytechnic became Huddersfield University in the 80s - my alma mater. Don't remember any live bands appearing there during my time, sadly.

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  2. As the Swede says an excellent idea
    Will you be getting North of the Border?
    If you get to Paisley give me a shout as I have done a mini series on bands from there

    I have no nuggets about Huddesfied.
    Never been there but have been to Halifax if that counts are are they deadly rivals?

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    1. Will definitely be heading to Scotland - we're all still the United Kingdom... For as long as we remain united.

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    2. No rivalry betweens HD & HX that I'm aware of and they have a much better ( and cheaper) cinema so I'm there quite often.

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  3. No Huddersfield in my collection, I'm afraid.

    I reluctantly draw your attention to Huddersfield Rain by Jaya The Cat. I say reluctantly, as I don't much care for it.

    However... I'm much happier to suggest Huddersfield Town by Roger Davies, which I quite like.

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    Replies
    1. Where do you find these things?

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    2. (Unsheathes oversized sword...)

      By the power of Greyskull!

      (Well, precision Googling, but you get the idea...)

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  4. All i can add is The Wave Pictures - Jonny "Huddersfield" Helm Sings, he is the drummer with The Wave Pictures.

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  5. I find it hard to believe that Half Man Half Biscuit have never mentioned Huddersfield. But they don't seem to have.

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    1. I did check. Closest they got was Hebden Bridge.

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  6. Good luck if you ever get to Preston, dude.

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  7. Just spotted this post - great idea and thanks for the mention. Sensible not to tie yourself down to a specific route as I seem to have got stuck in Delaware (must be something better than Perry Como).

    Don’t have any Huddersfield songs but with our new Dr Who coming from there it’s only a matter of time until someone a song about her, probably.

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  8. Stumbled across your blog which is great BTW. The Exploited - Sex and Violence first version starts... I want to go to Huddersfield. This was shortly after their gig here.
    Rol mentioned he doesn't remember any gigs at Hudds Poly but there were lots. I started going in 1979 often several times a week and there numerous superb ones.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you, Rich. Sadly, I was but a strip of a lad back in 1979, far too young to be out gigging. I obviously missed the glory days.

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