Monday, 25 January 2021

Conversations With Ben #1: James Hetfield & The News... and Sting



I'm thinking of starting a feature on the blog called Conversations With Ben. 

Part of me doesn't want to tell you this because I don't want you acting up for the cameras, but I figure it's pretty sleazy to not ask your permission, and also you might sue me for using your intellectual copyright or something.

Since your guest post, most people are convinced I made you up anyway.


I don't act up for anyone. My wit is and always shall be as sharp as those 70s pencil sharpeners on the teacher's desk that mangled the pencil. Use whatever, I'm not precious about what's said or used. I don't say anything I don't stand behind, and even when joking, there's not enough identifying info out there that people could use to discredit me. So go for it.

As I know you have a penchant for Mr Lewis. It's actually really well done the whole way through...

James Hetfield sees that and realises how his whole life has been a sham. Look at what you could have won...

They could make a new supergroup. Better Be True mixed with Nothing Else Matters.

Well, the News do need a new singer now that Huey has been struck down with Menieres. Which I still consider a tragedy. Meanwhile, Sting is fine.

Is he really, though?

I sat through The Bee Movie with Sam the other day. Awful. Sting had a cameo.

The only adequate thing Sting ever did was be The Face in Quadrophenia. And that was amateurish at best.

My favourite Sting song...

My favourite sting album...

My favourite Sting song...

I'm not sure we're talking about the same Sting.

Sting is more of an idea than a person.

Like the tooth fairy. Or Satan.


  1. I was into mashups for a while a few years ago, but haven't seen any for ages. Technology has clearly improved in the interim, this one's a corker.

  2. I once went to a Sting gig courtesy of a mate who'd won the tickets at an auction for Children In Need. After 3 songs, I got up and went to the bar.
    My mate joined me 2 songs later. There's only so many "yo-yo-yo's" a person can stand.

  3. His most convincing role was as the prick in the documentary Can't Stand Losing You: Surviving the Police.

  4. Hello again Ben - You're becoming a regular around here.

    I have long-suspected that Sting was not someone to write about around here but ouch, you guys are harsh.

  5. Brilliant mash-up. Now all we need is Toyah and Robert Fripp in the mix!

    I've nothing good to say about Sting either... Did once share a flight (my very first in fact) with his missus, though!

    1. When I first read that comment, C, I thought you shared a fight with her. That would be a story I wanted to hear!

    2. Ha! That’s how I read it too.

    3. Oh no, imagine that, they'd have had to call the Police....

    4. Very funny C - You’re back!


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