Emma Pollock or Emma's Imagination for the picture please, said Charity Chic, who's doing pretty well at picking our pictured artist lately, even if he can't supply any relevant tunes.
Ms. Pollock was always the Emma at the forefront of my mind for this post. I've been a fan since the early days of The Delgados.
The only other singing Emma in my collection is the actress Emma Caulfield, here duetting with Nicholas Brendon from the Buffy musical episode. I'm sure Alyson will appreciate this if nobody else.
Onto the songs then... although this week had less entries than usual. When I began this feature, I figured the girl's names would trounce the boy's names in song suggestions, but that hasn't been the case for the past few weeks. Anyway, here's what you had for me, beyond those that made the Top Ten...
...which was a bit too modern-Saxon. An older Saxon tune might have stood a chance.
Finally, you'll be pleased to know that my millennial hipster politico friend, Ben, was far too busy doing important things this week to devote much effort to the search, although he did offer the following, which he says reminds him of being 12...
I was 31 when that record came out. It reminds him of being 12. Grrr...
(Actually, I think he's a year or two older than your Maths will reveal... but I ignore him whenever he tells me his exact age because it makes me ill.)
Meanwhile, scraped from my own hard-drive, but still worthy of consideration...
And, from 1971, this curious tale of an Emma who...
...comes to see me
About 8 o'clock each night
And she throws her arms around me
And off we go in flight
Like an airplane
Moving up and down
Which, however sweetly sung, is a pretty terrible euphemism.
However, one night Emma is late... and Jonathan has his tea at 8.30, so frankly, don't mess me about love. I'm not sure this song is meant to make me laugh so much.
Within every city and town there's a madison Frozen lives for whom nothing's happening Hungry children is a mother's dilemma Dumpster diving to feed her baby Emma
That's a classic, though probably not enough of a lyrical nod compared to some of the ones that did make the final ten.
Big cheese down at the Tourist Information Come forth with your queries And I’ll wade out for miles Never trust a crown green bowler under thirty The future’s so dull I’ve gotta sing torch songs Dropkick the improv workshop mimeshow gobshite Facepaint Left Bank Kenneth Emma R-A-D-A Rainer Werner Cokeheads cokeheads cokeheads
From Rigid Digit and Walter. Lovelier than you'd expect from Chumbawamba, plus it's from an album called A Singsong And A Scrap. What else do you need?
Can I add one more, said Martin,because it's excellent. For Emma, forever ago.
Also, For Emma by Bon Iver,Alyson seconded, I only discovered them and the album of the same name when I started writing about the pesky virus in March. They had a song called Blindsided on that album which fitted the bill perfectly at the time.
Jury's still out here at Top Ten Towers on the whole Bon "I recorded this album in a cabin in the woods to get back to the roots" Iver experience, I'm afraid. Still, this was popular enough (on a quiet week) to make the chart.
Thanks to Emma, says C, I can recycle my comment from last week with the disallowed Teddy!
"...There's a sweet song: 'The Ballad of Marmalade Emma and Teddy Grimes' by Hard Meat, and I can give you a little background to the story too..."
The rather ambiguous-sounding name Hard Meat suggests all sorts – perhaps the title of an Andy Warhol film or a Scandinavian porn mag, maybe even the name of a militant anti-vegetarian group…so you may be relieved to know that the Hard Meat I’m referring to here is a 60s/70s band from Birmingham. Even then one might expect them to be Black Sabbath soundalikes, complete with controversial lyrics and dubious imagery - however, they had a far softer and more psychedelic/folk/acid rock sound and one does wonder why they chose such a name.
Their first single was a cover of the Beatles’ Rain’ (b/w ‘Burning Up Years’ which was covered by NZ band Human Instinct - many thanks to the reader who corrected the info stated on here earlier) released in 1969 on Island, and they went on to make two albums for Warner Brothers, ‘Hard Meat’ and ‘Through A Window’.
It is the last track on ‘Through A Window’ entitled ‘The Ballad of Marmalade Emma and Teddy Grimes’ (also released as a single in 1970), which has been on continuous play in my mind this week. I just love its uplifting feel, and an overall sound reminiscent of Traffic and early Faces. I was also intrigued by its subject matter because Marmalade Emma and Teddy Grimes were real characters who, through the late 1800s/early 1900s, resided in the historic town of Colchester, which is just a few miles from where I live.
It’s assumed that Hard Meat were spending some time in the Essex countryside when they heard talk of these legendary local characters in a pub and were so struck by the stories that they decided to write a song about them.
Marmalade Emma and Teddy Grimes, pictured below in 1910, lived as eccentric tramps and roamed the streets of Colchester begging and blagging all that they needed to live on, drinking beer slops from the local pubs, sleeping in ditches and hedges, and probably managing to get by very adequately on very little. The local community tolerated them in spite of some controversy and brushes with the law – on the 1891 Census Emma registered her occupation as ‘prostitute’, the only one on the list, and was also sent to prison briefly for swearing at a policeman. Story has it that on her return from the clink some local lads asked her where she’d been, to which she replied, “to college”.
Read the rest, and see Marmalade Emma and Teddy Grimes for yourself, here.
Blimey, it's a long time since I heard the name Beulah, Brian. Didn't know this one, but it wins the prize for Best New Song You Guys Have Introduced Me To This Week. Especially when the trumpet kicks in at the 2 1/2 minute mark.
You flirt, you drink, you can't stop your winking at the boys at the bar
All you need is a gun and a car
A country song if you don't have a heart
1. Hot Chocolate - Emma
Back when pop/soul (what they'd call r 'n' b these days) had proper guitar solos in it!
Suggested by Martin, Lynchie and Alyson, who adds...
They were so consistent over a period of about 15 years yet I never hear of them much nowadays - anyway, a beautiful yet really sad song.
Thank you also to Martin for reminding me of the Sisters of Mercy cover...
A picture of Eddie Cochran obviously, said Charity Chic in response to my request for songs with the name Edward, Eddie or Ed in them. And as he wrote obviously rather than "obvs", I went with his suggestion.
Of course, there were many other famous musical Edwards I could have gone with, including the recently departed Eddie Van Halen, Ed Tudor-Pole, Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeroes (from George), Edward Ball, Eddie & The Hotrods, Eddie Vedder, Eddie Floyd, Eddie Boyd, Eddie Jones, Charles & Eddie (from Alyson), Eddie Rabbit, Eddie Kirk, Eddie Fisher, Eddie Holland, Eddie Money (see this week's Saturday Snapshots), Eddie Kendricks... the list goes on and on. But did any of them ever record a song as iconic as this...?
Whereas Swiss Adam directs us to Edward Barton, the poet responsible for this little ditty, originally recorded by his girlfriend Jane (long before Opus 3 got their mucky dance paws all over it)...
Anyway, that's not why we're here. We're here to celebrates songs about Edwards (or at least songs that mention them). So let's get cracking, because there's loads to go at...
And continuing on a pretty-boy rock star vibe, RD added...
Iron Maiden's omnipresent/ever changing mascot is called Eddie. He has given his name to a Maiden-based video game and a compilation album (both titled Ed Hunter)...
Coincidentally, my millennial hipster politico friend, Ben, recommended this (from the album Ed Hunter) as his favourite Maiden track this week.
...which... well, I hope you'll excuse me if I steal an explanation from elsewhere on t'internet...
This song tells the story of the beginnings of British heavy metal band Iron Maiden, personified as a gay love triangle between original lead singer Paul Di'Anno, Eddie (“Eddie the Head,” the band’s mascot who appears on their album covers, and in this song represents the band as a whole), and Bruce Dickinson, the band’s second singer who replaced Paul in 1981.
Fat Mike explains:
I was just thinking that some of their songs are so good and they were just so cool when they had Paul Di’Anno in the band. Then they got Bruce Dickinson, this falsetto fuck, and for me, it just ruined everything.
Charming. Poor old Bruce D.
Anyway, while we're here with my millennial hipster politico friend, Ben... well, he obviously had some spare time on his hands this week. His short-list was almost longer than mine...
Have to live up to this idea you have of me as a hipster!
Is that what hipsters listen to then? My current (not for much longer!) next door neighbour is a hipster and he blasts out Snow Patrol. I'm not convinced hipsters have set musical affiliations. I may be wrong.
Anyway, I have no idea what Death Grips are on about, but there were quite a few Eddies in there. Including the great Ed 'Lou Grant' Asner. God knows why.
Now this is why I keep Ben around. Because in the middle of all his hipster suggestions, he'll throw in a b-side by The Small Faces or an early John Cougar song, a track even the internet can't quite decipher the lyrics to, although most sites tend to agree that are a couple of Eddie references in there.
Ah, but wait, the mention of Edward Scissorhands allows us to zip over to Canada, where Douglas has a related suggestion...
Just one to put forward for your consideration, to prevent the lost from getting out of hand: the always delightful Lucksmiths with the song "Edward, Sandwich Hand". Delightful wordplay and a whistling riff to hook you into the chorus.
Jeff Rosenstock is someone who Ben introduced me to a while back. He produces some very cool tunes (if occasionally a little too loud for these aged ears) and has a strange attitude to the music industry in that he seems not too interested in making any money out of it. For example, you can get his latest collection of songs from Bandcamp... but he doesn't want your money.
Please do not feel obliged to spend money on this music. I do not intend for it to be monetized. Any money that comes in through Bandcamp for these songs will be donated to charitable causes, but less money will get taken out if you just do that directly on your own - which I encourage you to do if you can afford it. And if not, it's cool.
Anyway, there's another Edwards Scissorhands reference in the track above, if you can dig it out.
Which brings us, finally, to Walter, who also appeared to have a bit of spare time on his hands this week...
His blue Morris van is parked in an alley Just by Montague street His friend Eddie he did the respray So he couldn't drive it all last week And it cost most of the money That he had saved up To pay Eddie's receipt But he figures it's worth it Cause the disguise is a must When they go missing They're gonna look for the van first She whispers slowly "it'll be alright" I took some cash from my building society And my monthly check came in just right If only they knew they weren't giving it away
That came very close to making the ten, Walter. As did this...
Edward, see those alluring lights ? Tonight will be your very last night
Don't worry though, some of your other suggestions really hit home. But no, Ed fROMOHIO, singer and guitarist of fIREHOSE doesn't get a mention, if only because of his abuse of the CAPS LOCK key.
OK, time to scrap the barnacles off the side of the boat. Here's the rest of the long-list from my hard-drive this week...
But now Eddie the Eunuch is a rock and roll critic Sucking like a super star Slicker than a shoe-shine Quicker than a two-time Eddie what a thang you are Eddie makes a damn good livin', baby Putting other people down
Ah yes, songs hitting back at music critics... there's got to be a Top Ten in that somewhere.
Featuring Eddie Argos from Art Brut and David Devant (minus His Spirit Wife). Only available on MySpace, it seems. (I know, I didn't even know MySpace was still a thing either.)
Oh and there's 'Eddie & Sheena' by Wayne County & The Electric Chairs, says C, one of the first bands I ever saw down at our little local club when I was 14 (Wayne was quite something to behold, especially in 1978) and they gave everyone a free Eddie & Sheena badge at the door - soon to be defiantly pinned to my school blazer of course!
I'm always too late here nowadays, says Alyson, so will get in quick with a name-check. Brenda and Eddie - Scenes From An Italian Restaurant by Billy Joel.
A seemingly throwaway suggestion, though in the process Alyson has stuck a pin in one of my all-time favourite Billy Joel songs. (I feel my love of Billy Joel has recently been vindicated by Hughie in The Boys. If you know, you know.)
You have to wait for the tempo change, but Brenda and Eddie play an important role in this song...
I'll obv(iou)s(ly) go for Sleeper - Nice Guy Eddie, said Martin (courting disaster with his barely hidden attempt at evoking the yoof-speak I banned last week), and not just because I'd listen to Louise sing the phone book ;)
Nice Guy Eddie, of course, turned out to be not such a nice guy after all...
Most weeks this would have been Number One, as I share a similar devotion to the divine Ms. Wener as Martin. However...
This week's winner is going to be one of those where I'm biased and play to my favourites, but thankfully Walter was with me...
1. Bruce Springsteen - Meeting Across The River
Amid all the rock 'n' roll bombast of the greatest album of the 70s comes this quiet slice of desperate lowlife storytelling set over a haunting, noirish solo from jazz trumpeter Randy Brecker. And Roy Bittan's characteristic piano playing and another jazz musician, Richard Davis, on double bass.
It doesn't sound like anything else on the album (although lyrically, it follows similar themes), but it's perfectly placed as an intimate pause for breath as the penultimate track on side two before the epic finale of Jungleland.
Hey, Eddie, can you lend me a few bucks
And tonight can you get us a ride?
Gotta make it through the tunnel
Got a meeting with a man on the other side
Hey Eddie, this guy, he's the real thing
So if you want to come along
You gotta promise you won't say anything
'Cause this guy don't dance
And the word's been passed this is our last chance
We gotta stay cool tonight, Eddie
'Cause man, we got ourselves out on that line
And if we blow this one
They ain't gonna be looking for just me this time
And all we gotta do is hold up our end
Here stuff this in your pocket
It'll look like you're carrying a friend
And remember, just don't smile
Change your shirt, 'cause tonight we got style
Well, Cherry says she's gonna walk
'Cause she found out I took her radio and hocked it
But Eddie, man, she don't understand
That two grand's practically sitting here in my pocket
And tonight's gonna be everything that I said
And when I walk through that door
I'm just gonna throw that money on the bed
She'll see this time I wasn't just talking
Then I'm gonna go out walking
Hey Eddie, can you catch us a ride ?
The obvious E for a girl's name would have been Emily, but it turns out I already did that here...
Everyone has a friend called Dave, right? I actually have two. Though I don't see them that much anymore. (Let's face it: I don't see anybody that much anymore.)
Very few suggestions this week for a famous David to illustrate our Top Ten. I wonder why?
I hope not after that dreadful suggestion,George replied.
Now I don't always agree with George (who does?), but I find myself having to here. Beyond ruining early Springsteen songs, if this if the Earth Band's great claim to fame, they should have stuck with counting backwards from 5. It's not a bad song, I just can't get past the opening couplet...
Davy's on the road again Wearing different clothes again
I mean, I should hope so.
But wait, before I get too mean about Manfred Mann's Earth Band... here's Lynchie...
I knew Dave Flett of "Davy's On The Road Again" fame.
I keep telling you, mate, even though Guest Post Thursday appears to have run out of gas, the door is always open for more of your stories. You could at least tell us if he wore different clothes every time he went out on the road.
I remember you liked the Scars' track I put on over at my place recently, so wonder if you'll like another song from the same album - perfectly titled... as you might imagine... 'David'!
Good work, C, though a little too angular and spikey for my ageing lugs. I preferred All About You. That may well feature on this blog one day soon.
Here's Rigid Digit, with what seems like it should be an obvious choice. Except...
Both from Morrissey's best-forgotten "let's take the piss out of chavs" phase. Still, we look back on that with fond nostalgia given his most recent phases.
It's worth pointing out too that Moz wasn't the first person to use that particular Dave in a song title...
Also recorded by Bob Dylan. Which only goes to show that we're missing The Swede this week. I hope he's OK.
Now to Canada, where Douglas is basking in the glory of getting one of his countrymen into last week's Top Ten...
...and may I just mention that Colter Wall has a fantastic track called "Me And Big Dave", wherein he absolutely sounds nothing whatsoever like a person in his 20's but everything like the embodiment of what is deep, soulful and great about country music in the Cash-like vein? Can the young Canadian rank two weeks in a row, perhaps clawing his way deeper in the Top Ten?
And if that is not your thing, the Trash Can Sinatras once again have a contender, with the raucous and ebullient b-side (gawsh, they save some of the best for the flip sides, don't they?) entitled "Ask Davy". According to legend, when the as-yet-untitled track was being readied for release, the record exec types came to hassle the band abound the small matter of a title for the song before going to press. The band, sorely pressed, tried to brush off the corporate pedants by steering them for suggestions to the usually forthcoming bassist, Davy Hughes....and that is how the track came to qualify for this week's Top Ten...
We'll start with this from Lynchie, because I'm a sucker for this kind of Bonnie & Clyde story song. (I should do a Top Ten of them.) And I doubt we'll ever get around to a Top Ten Trudy Songs.
Well, Trudy and Dave, those crazy kids
Had a baby of their own, and you heard what they did
In the middle of a strip mall shots rang out
Shots heard all over the world, no doubt
'Cause it was there in the paper the very next day
'Bout a couple and a baby and a Chevrolet
Who shot up an automatic teller machine
Took the money for the laundry and drove away clean
If you ever do "Ethel" songs, can I suggested John Hiatt's Ethylene?
Good call, Lynchie. Though I'm probably more likely to do the Trudy Top Ten. I mean, I bet Sting has a bunch of those I could take the piss out of use.
Covered by everyone and his dog, this is the original, and it reminds me of my childhood... despite the fact I never saw the TV show. Pop culture stuck around a lot longer back then.
Martin wins great accolades for digging this one up...
It has an all-star cast video that can't fail to put a smile on the face of anyone who watched The X Files back in the day - really, watch right through to the end, beyond the song.
That was brilliant.
And the best bit was, the video featured many of my TV heroes... not just Mulder & Scully and Buffy and Gary Shandling and Erik Estrada... but also Dennis Franz, star of the greatest TV series ever made.
Highlight of my week. Thanks, Martin.
Side note: Gillian Anderson playing Maggie Thatcher is wrong in so many ways that it makes me hurt.
In my head, I could hear a song where someone goes "Huh - Dave!" in a disparaging voice. I think, however, I was thinking of Bob George by Prince, and projecting a Dave onto it.
But then I kept thinking: no, no, this is a Flight of the Conchords song - I'm sure of it.
Got there in the end.
And when I saw you at my mate's place
I thought, "What is she doing
At my mate's place?"
How did Dave get a hottie like that to a party like this?
Now, I have to admit I get a bit rankled by Talk Talk, so when my millennial hipster politico friend, Ben, also suggested this one, I might have snapped.
You're not part of that whole "Spirit of Eden is the greatest album in the history of recorded music" conspiracy, are you? (Both Guy Garvey and Huey Morgan are among the disciples of this particular cult.)
My millennial hipster politico friend, Ben, replied:
It's a key album in the development of post-rock music. The blueprints are there but I don't think they knew what to do with it properly.
This turned into a whole argument with me railing against the very concept of "post rock" and Ben quoting Mogwai and post-metal and Math rock and me saying I'd rather listen to Twisted Sister. It got ugly. But there are worse ways to spend a Friday afternoon.
She's still thinking about this when the bus goes passed caroline lee's house where there was a party last week. There were some german exchange students there who were very mature; they all ended up jumping out of the bedroom window. One of them tried to get her to kiss him on the stairs, so she kicked him. Later she was sick because she drunk too much cider. Caroline was drunk as well; she was pretending she was married to a tall boy in glasses, and she had to wear a polo-neck for three days afterwards to cover up the love-bite on her neck.
That was a very strong contender, partly because it scratches my "short stories in songs" itch and partly because it was the first Pulp song I ever fell in love with. But I guess I had to save it for Our Top Ten Susan Songs.
My name is Caroline Cell phone number here, call if you have the time Twenty-eight and bored, grieving over loss Sorry to be heavy, but heavy is the cost Heavy is the cost
Which, if I ever get round to completing it, will be a strong contender for Number One in My Top Ten Lonely Hearts Column Songs. Although it will obviously be up again Rupert Holmes.
Also on the lyrical side of things, strong calls from Walter...
I am enthused to be able to introduce you to another strong Canadian contender here!
If your willing to stretch out a little into the Country realm (as I believe by your other selections you are on occasion) my collection yields up the somewhat shocking voice of Colter Wall, from Saskatchewan (that's prairie town, Canada style if you are not up on your Canadian geography, the heart of Canadian Country music). A little test? See if you too, like the Proclaimers, "can say "Saskatchewan" without starting to stutter..." Anyway, give a listen to his song "Caroline" from 2015, and see if you can believe that the lad had barely turned 20 at the time of recording that song.
No, he certainly doesn't sound 20. I have heard Ricky Ross playing Colter on his Radio Scotland Country show, but I hadn't heard this one. It's utterly bewitching though. Thanks, Douglas.
Can't argue with this suggestion from John Medd. How many other songs can you think of where the roses smell like poo poo?
Caroline (Caroline) Caroline All the guys would say she's mighty fine (mighty fine) But mighty fine only got you somewhere half the time And the other half either got you cussed out, or coming up short
Born in the very same year Alive at a similar time It gave me something small that I could feel That maybe as you grew, you knew how I'd feel And Caroline and I knew how you'd feel Rattled through our teenage years Battled and loved who we fought The first time you left home on your own I knew A little bit of you is gone when you do And Caroline and I well we grew, well that's true Caroline and I
You've beaten me to it C, as that was the song I would have suggested. I think I discovered it from one of the other blogs a couple of years ago and was blown away it - there isa great YouTube clipwith loads of '60s/'70s scenes in black and white which brings always brings on an overwhelming sense of nostalgia when I watch it: just matches the sound of the song so well.
Spot on C, an absolute beauty. Another Robert Wyatt tune at least partially inspired by Caroline Coon (as well as Carla Bley and Marsha Hunt) is 'To Carla, Marsha and Caroline(For Making Everything Beautifuller)' from his 1970 LP 'The End of an Ear'. Not sure if Rol will allow that though.
That may bend the Song For Whoever rule, Swede, but it is quite lovely. Matching Mole for the win though... if only there weren't such stiff competition this week.
Martin and Rigid Digit both picked this for Number One. I respect that. But sometimes there's just no competition.
Now I lie here with you, can't get her out my head
Do you think she knows that you share my bed
Well, I don't want to see Caroline
Don't want to see her face when she finds out you're mine
How could a friend be so unkind
Well, I don't want to see Caroline
1. Neil Diamond - Sweet Caroline
There are those of you who may not like Sweet Caroline, and I don't often say this, because everyone is entitled to their opinion and it's all subjective and opinions are like arseholes... but you're wrong.
