Monday, 20 March 2023

Celebrity Jukebox #78: Max Von Sydow

The power of Christ compels me to see what ungodly tunes might have been sung about Carl Adolf von Sydow, an actor about whom we probably don't need to ask "Why'd you change it to Max?" (He stole the name from the star of a Flea Circus he saw while in the army.) 

Von Sydow began his career playing chess with Death in The Seventh Seal, a metaphor which could well be extended to his later roles in The Exorcist and as Ming The Merciless in Flash Gordon. Checkmate finally came in 2020, when Max was 90... no one escapes Death.

Here's a band called Randy. They're big fans of The Exorcist, but not so much the sequel...

Some years went by then came The Heretic: Exorcist 2
Starring Linda Blair and Max Von Sydow too
It had none of the mood or the tension
It was not a worthy continuation, a category B
And a big disappointment for me, oh me

Next up, it's Norway's answer to John Denver: Ole Paus, with a song that appears to begin with  a Norwegian politician's response to The Exorcist.

Ungdomssekretæren herr Oddvar Søvik
I den Lutherske Norske Indremisjon
Var på kino en kveld og så Max von Sydow
Og en pike som lå og balet med en forførerisk demon

You'll have to forgive me, my Norwegian is a little rusty.

Now I've heard some pretty odd tunes since I started this feature, but I reckon Jon and Wei Kai might take the biscuit. 

Late last night I was out of my mind
When I learned that Max Von Sydow had died

Here's a band named after Max Von Sydow. There had to be one, didn't there?

And here's a band called Christ Chopper. It might be better to imagine what they sound like rather than clicking the link. Guess what, you're right!

And here's some Danish rap...

Fortunately, I only need one good tune to make this feature worthwhile. And one good tune is what we get. Here's a song by the wonderful Allo Darlin' about Woody Allen's movie Hannah & Her Sisters, in which Max played a key role...

In the movie of our lives, would Woody Allen write the screenplay?
Not his best era, but certainly not his worst either
But I wouldn't like to be like Diane Keaton in Manhattan
So cerebral was she, runs away from any romance

Max von Sydow couldn't play you
Max von Sydow couldn't play you
I know you'd want him to
But Max von Sydow couldn't play you

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