Friday, 20 March 2026
Fun Fact Friday #6: If I Had Words...
Sunday, 3 October 2021
Snapshots #209: A Top Ten ...Ville Songs
Time for this week's answers... my precious, precious things!
10. Mix-up on brutish lover.
"On brutish lover", mixed up = Louvin Brothers.
The Louvin Brothers - Knoxville Girl
9. Add to embers for total recall.
REM+embers...
REM - (Don't Go Back To) Rockville
8. Russian celebrity adores beetles.
A Russian celeb would be a star-ski. And he loves bugs.
Lovebug Starski - Amityville (House On The Hill)
7. Needed a Band Aid.
Band Aid was formed to help the famine in Ethiopia.
The Ethiopians - Train To Skaville
6. Bale Slater Dior.
They're all Christians.
5. Slipknot, twice.
Anagram!
Wilson Pickett - 635-4789 (Soulsville, USA)
4. Nerdy offspring.
Son of Dork - Ticket Out Of Loserville
3. Those clothes just don't match.
They clash.
2. All You Can Eat.
An All You Can Eat Buffett, obviously. With a certain beverage to wash it all down...
1. Could unlock the start of the week.
Sunday, 27 January 2019
Saturday Snapshots #68 - The Answers
Imagine all the people who can't work out the answers to Saturday Snapshots! How Do You Sleep when there's one you just can't get?
A pretty even spread of marks this week, with lots of you working together to piece together the clues. Charity Chic won with 3 whole points, but well done to Walter, Chris, Alyson, Rigid Digit and C for sterling efforts - and a welcome return from George, who christened the Christians.
Of course, I did goof pretty badly on the photo for clue 2. More on that below. Hang my head in shame. Oh, Nobody Told Me there'd be days like these... we better get some answers!
10. Neneh's spirit adds to division.
Neneh Cherry.
Spirit = ghost.
Adding & division are basic things you do in Mathematics.
Cherry Ghost - Mathematics
9. Denying the assassination, Lee takes the third train track to insanity.
When Lee Harvey Oswald denied killing JFK, he claimed to be just a patsy.
The third train track might be the C-Line.
Patsy Cline - Crazy
8. Apostles clean up the town.
The Christians - Hooverville
7. F1 equestrian assassins.
Formula 1 involves racing cars.
Racing Cars - They Shoot Horses, Don't They?
6. Piercing vision refuses gimp outfit.
X-Ray Spex would give you piercing vision.
X-Ray Spex - Oh Bondage, Up Yours!
5. Tiny heads home for a quiet weekend.
Tiny heads would have small faces.
Hello, Mrs. Jones - how's your Bert's lumbago?
Mustn't grumble...
The Small Faces - Lazy Sunday
4. Big bad Wonderland. When will they be famous?
Big Bad Wolf + Alice In Wonderland.
Bros sang When Will I Be Famous.
Wolf Alice - Bros
3. Alien pal phones Morrissey because he hasn't had a good mope in ages.
ET's pal was Elliot. ET wanted his help to "phone home".
Morrissey was a Smith.
If you haven't had a good mope in ages, you probably miss misery.
Elliot Smith - Miss Misery
2. LimbibingA, futuristic fibre truck.
1. Fatal Moe indicates his way to heaven.
The indicator is a light that flashes on your dashboard.
Heaven is paradise.
Saturday Snapshots is finished for this week. Don't worry - next Saturday morning, it'll be (Just Like) Starting Over...
Monday, 21 May 2018
Mid-Life Crisis Songs #26: I'm The Same Age That My Father Was...
...When I First Thought He Was Old.
I owe this particular Mid-Life Crisis tune to Rigid Digit, who recently recommended the album it hails from (along with 9 far more familiar offerings) as one if his Top Ten Albums, calling it "a bible for the Grumpy Middle Aged Man". Well, obviously I had to investigate immediately... and I'm glad I did. Suffice it to sat I'll definitely be returning later to nominate the former Christians frontman for a Grumpy Old Man post of his own, but in the meantime this particular tunes hits the old Mid-Life Crisis right where it hurts.
As mentioned here quite recently, I was 42 when I became a father... the same age my dad was when I was born. I'm not sure when I realised that my parents were older than most of my friends' mums and dads, but it did hit me when I was quite young and I remember sobbing at the thought of losing them because "they are so old". I consider myself blessed to have reached the age I am now and still have both of them around to enjoy their final grandchild. But the clock is ticking... for all of us.
Make the most of what time you have...
26. Henry Priestman - Old
Sunday, 12 July 2015
My Top Ten Hoover / Vacuum Cleaner Songs
Ten odes to the humble vacuum cleaner (and other Hoover-related thingamabobs). Unfortunately, I couldn't find any songs named after the Dyson. Sorry, Sir James.
Special mentions to Hoover, Hooverphonic, the extremely tantalising Jimmy The Hoover (lost classic!), Mindless Drug Hoover (swearily hilarious) and, of course, Freddie's greatest drag moment (above).
Extra special mention to the Shake 'n' Vac ad. Because.
Sadly, I couldn't find The Yodelling Hoover by The Soft Boys anywhere on t'internet, but I'm sure it's great because it's Robyn Hitchcock.
10. The Candyskins - Mrs. Hoover
Forgotten Britpop 15-minuters give it their all in this cheery ode to women in their underwear vacing up.
9. Glen Hansard - Broken Hearted Hoover Fixer Sucker Guy
A tiny lo fi delight from the soundtrack to busker's love story Once.
8. The Toy Dolls - Her With A Hoover
Despite only ever having one UK hit (a punked up version of Nellie The Elephant, very popular in 80s school discos), The Toy Dolls are, surprisingly, still in the go and still releasing records. This year's is called Olgacoustic, presumably because lead singer Michael "Olga" Algar is busking on it. Their previous record surely had the best title ever though: The Album After The Last One.
One more, two more7. Pere Ubu - Vacuum In My Head
Fleas on the bedroom floor
No ones ever seen her, with a vacuum cleaner
Three more, four more
Mice unite at the kitchen door
It weren't no rotten rumour,
He could never move her,
And I never saw her with a hoover.
One for the John Peel fans. David Thomas has a vacuum cleaner in his head and it's sucking up everything he knows.
6. Edwyn Collins & Bernard Butler - Can't Do That (The Hoover)
A laidback psychedelic groove that shows what happens when you spill Orange Juice on Suede.
5. Arctic Monkeys - I Wanna Be Yours
Alex Turner is a great lyricist, finding grubby romance in the everyday mundanity of old man's pubs, pick 'n' mix bags and late night taxi journeys. But here, he bows down to a true master, reworking John Cooper Clarke's poem of the same name...
I wanna be your vacuum cleaner4. Sugar - Hoover Dam
Breathing in your dust I wanna be your Ford Cortina
I will never rust...
Bob Mould goes all 'To Be Or Not To Be' on the edge of the Hoover Dam. No vacuum cleaners, but a damned fine tune, nevertheless.
3. 'Til Tuesday - Love In A Vacuum
Before going on to a superlative solo career, Aimee Mann was the lead singer of synth-heavy 80s new wave band 'Til Tuesday. This is one of their best,but it's not as timeless as her later work.
2. The Christians - Hooverville
A politically charged anthem from the mighty Christians... nothing to do with cleaning up your house, unless they're asking crooked politicians to do just that.
1. Elvis Costello - Hoover Factory
Elvis pays tribute to the distinctive Art Deco design of London's Hoover Building... now owned by Tesco.
I don't think I'll be compiling a Top Ten Tesco Songs anytime soon.
Five miles out of London on the Western Avenue
Must have been a wonder when it was brand new
Talkin' 'bout the splendour of the Hoover factory
I know that you'd agree if you had seen it too...
Which is your dustbuster?
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