Snapshots #439: Religious People In Songs

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to listen to some songs about men and women of the cloth...

15. The only trains James Brown would ever take.

Grand Funk Railroad - Goin' For The Pastor

14. Hello - this is...

Joni Mitchell - The Priest

13. Black, Hammer, Simon.

Blacksmith, Hammersmith, Simon Smith...

The Smiths - Vicar In A Tutu

12. High in Antioxidants.

Black Grape - Reverend Black Grape

11. They get around, rather aimlessly.

The Drifters - Like Sister And Brother

Sisters being nuns, brothers being monks. Of course.

10. All-important band for Mr. Spock.

Essential Logic - Shabby Abbott

9. Don't confuse him with a thick Jew.

"A thick Jew" was an anagram for one of Donald Trump's least favourite pop stars... 

Jack White - Archbishop Harold Holmes

8. Paper, Black, Shoe.

Paper Lace, Black Lace, Shoelace.

Lace - The Nun

7. Able footballers and keen fans of Thelonious Monk.

Named after a Thelonious Monk album... and an amazing football shot.

The Brilliant Corners - The Pope, the Monkey and the Queen

What a great tune. Not the best Pope song I know, but this guy gets far too much exposure round thes parts...

Prince - Pope

6. Witch hunter who found wonder in the invisible world.

Check your history books.

Cotton Mather - The Words Of Shaman Roger 

5. U.N. medics.

The World Health Organisation...

The Who - Baba O'Reilly

There are days when I'm certain that is The Who's finest hour.

4. Yoof speak.

Modern Talking - Brother Louie

I was a little upset to discover I didn't own that track... I thought I had pretty much everything that ever made the Top 20 in the early 80s. Then I listened to it again and figured it was no great loss.

3. Todd gets in between Tim Booth and Morrissey.

James - Todd - Smith.

Also known as...

LL Cool J - Father

2. Walk this way!

Pavement - Box Elder

1. Deputy finds girls in muddle.

"Deputy finds girls" was an anagram for a very young Mary O'Brien...

Dusty Springfield - Son Of A Preacher Man

Please leave something in the collection plate on your way out of the church.

Snapshots #406: Songs About Weapons

Yesterday, we had Britney SPEARS at the top of the page... today, it's Bruce Lee, whose whole body was a weapon.

And here are 15 more weapons for Your Arsenal...

15. Packed.

The missing faces belong to The Jam.

The Jam - The Eton Rifles 

Or...

The Jam - A Bomb In Wardour Street

14. Go on, go on, voice of Russia.

Sigue means go on. Sputnik was the voice of Russia.

Sigue Sigue Sputnik - Love Missile F1-11

13. Pop art from Indiana (Robert).

This is Robert Indiana's LOVE sculpture...

Love Sculpture - Sabre Dance

12. Enjoy heavy metal in the café with a Friendly waiter.

Gunther was the waiter in the Friends café... not the Hard Rock Café.

Hardrock Gunter - Rifle, Belt and Bayonet

11. Barry Judd in negative.

Barry Judd was the character in Hi Fidelity played by Jack Black. In negative, he would be...

Jack White - Blunderbuss

10. Did you know that Henry VIII wanted to form an Eastern European football team, but he didn't have quite enough players?

If you have to explain the joke, it stops being funny...

Ten Pole Tudor - Swords Of A Thousand Men

9. Ian thought he was sweet.

Ian Dury sang about Sweet Gene Vincent.

Gene Vincent - Pistol Packin' Mama

8. Italian brothers.

Fratelli is brother in Italian...

The Fratellis - Chelsea Dagger

7. Myanmar Tower of Strength.

Tower of Strength was a song by The Mission. Myanmar is Burma.

Mission of Burma - That's When I Reach for My Revolver

6. Oh, Tony, tax is such a mess, isn't it?

"Oh, Tony, tax" was an anagram.

Hoyt Axton - Torpedo

5. Paddy's Omen.

Paddy fields produce rice. Damien was in The Omen.

Damien Rice - Cannonball

4. You can't beat these nuns.

The Rhythm Sisters - Pocket Hand Grenade

3. Marvin gets jumpy.

Lee Marvin, that is.

Leapy Lee - Little Arrows

2. Stretch and massage...

Ways to relieve the cramps...

The Cramps - Bikini Girls With Machine Guns

1. He'll happily adjust any dam bras you give him.

"Any dam bras" was an anagram too.

Bryan Adams - Cuts Like A Knife

A much less threatening edition of Snapshots next Saturday...

Listening Post #32: Random Algo-Recommendations

In the process of compiling Namesakes and Saturday Snapshots, I go on youtube quite a lot looking at music videos. Whenever I go on there, the algorithm tries to recommend other things it thinks I will like.

Things like this...

Clearly I'm going to be interested in a song called The Jamie Oliver Petrol Station, for any number of reasons. The jury's still out on CMAT, I want to like her material more than I do, but I'm always impressed by her lyrics... even though the whole point of this song is waiting for her to get to the point.

And then there's this...

I can pretty much guarantee that 95% of people reading this blog would run a mile from the video above, but I loved it. I mean, come on... Dolly Crue? Credit to all involved. And it's a charity single too, so you can't knock it.

And finally... this has got to be the best thing Jack White has done in years. And I'd just about written him off too...

Great performance from John C. Reilly in the video too...

Snapshots #302: A Top Ten Dollar Price Songs

I've been dying to feature The Six Million Dollar Man on TV On The Radio, but I haven't been able to find any decent tunes that mention him. (A lot of tunes do, just no decent ones. Unless you know different...?) 

Anyway, here's the man with the Bionic Eye, which the interweb tells me "has a 20:1 zoom lens and infrared capabilities", so there must be a camera in there too, right? And here are ten songs which also proclaim their value in dollars...

10. Stuck in your bottom, and in Iowa itself. 

Stuck in your bottom, and in Iowa itself. 

Tom Waits - $29.00

9. The Prodigy, in a patriarchy. 

Prodigies are young geniuses (google it - it's not genii). In a patriarchy though, they would only recognise the smart boys. Although the lads don't even know how to use capital letters, so what hope is there?

boygenius -$20

This one was specially for CC.

8. Discotheque that only plays A Horse With No Name.

That would be a Club that only plays Music by America.

American Music Club - $1,000,000 Song

7. Goes with Vera and Betty.

Aloe Vera and Black Betty...

Aloe Blacc - I Need A Dollar

6. Slain rain.

One of Jack White's many diversions...

The Dead Weather - Three Dollar Hat

5. Pig home, inventory, spasms.

Sty + list + tics...

Stylistics - $7000 & You

4. Where a Flashy actor goes to buy sable. 

I've not been a big fan of recent movies based on DC Comics, but I thought The Flash was OK... despite being a box office bomb. It was good to see Michael Keaton back in the Batsuit, and the Nicolas Cage cameo was worth the ticket price alone. Controversial star Ezra Miller was rather irksome though... I doubt they'll be back.

If Ezra wanted to buy some sable though, they'd probably go to the fur man.

Ezra Furman - Maraschino Red Dress $8.99 at Goodwill

3. Throw him on a bonfire with Joni.

Guys are made to be thrown on the bonfire. Never do that to Joni Mitchell.

Guy Mitchell - A Dime And A Dollar

2. Mrs. Paragons gets in a kerfuffle with Raoul Shimmery.

Two anagrams, un-kerfuffled...

Gram Parsons & Emmylou Harris - $1000 Wedding

A grand probably wouldn't even pay for the dress these days.

1. Tommy, in chains.

It never ceases to amaze me that we're now healthily into the 300s, and I'm still discovering big name artists who have never appeared in Snapshots before. Even more incredible is when it's artists I actually like. 

Above is a young Vincent Furnier, and his puppy, before he adopted his more distinctive stage persona...

Tommy Cooper + Alice In Chains =

Alice Cooper - Billion Dollar Babies

I bet you a dollar you come back for more next Saturday...

Hot 100 #21

Yes, I could have chosen the logo of Twenty One Pilots to illustrate this post, but I don't think they ever recorded a song as good as this. Feel free to disabuse me of that notion should you wish. Jim In Dubai also suggested another 12 group...

Jim's Twenty One - Throwaway Friend

...which I don't think is his own bad, but it's pretty good regardless.

Welcome to the 80th post in this series (look, I did the Maths, you work it out)... which means The Key To The Door: Number 21.

Let's start with Martin, who appears to be struggling somewhat this week...

Erm. 21. Feels like there should be loads.

Well, I found a fair few.

So Solid Crew - 21 Seconds

That... wasn't one of them.

Alanis Morrissette - 21 Things I Want In A Lover

Neither was that. Although it's a step up from So Solid Crew.

Sigue Sigue Sputnik - 21st Century Boy which is probably the first time they've rubbed up against Alanis...

Blimey, you really are scraping the barrel this week.

The Who - 1921

That's more like it.

ELO - 21st Century Man

That's not bad either. Not a winner though.

While we're in the 21st Century, we might as well get these out of the way too...

The Soundtrack of Our Lives - 21st Century Rip Off

Mike Peters - 21st Century

Laptop - 21st Century World

Toto - 21st Century Blues

Frank Hamilton - 21C

Glenn Frey - Love In The 21st Century

Frank Turner - 21st Century Survival Blues

Jamie Cullum (yes, Jamie Cullum, deal with) - 21st Century Kid

Midland - 21st Century Honky Tonk American Band

Jim in Dubai offered Luke Haines - 21st Century Man

C tried King Crimson - 21st Century Schizoid Man

The Swede had T.Rex - 21st Century Stance and The Membranes - 21st Century Man, but curiously not The Mebranes - The 21st Century Is Killing Me.

And Rigid Digit supplied Green Day - 21st Century Breakdown, which hails from the same album as Green Day - 21 Guns. Not their best, no, but no their worst either.

Finally, Douglas offered...

Bad Religion - 21st Century (Digital Boy)

But... well, let's face it: the 21st Century is pretty horrible, so I think we'll skip all those, fine songs though they may be.

Back to The Swede...

Luxuria - Lady 21

Bon Iver - 21 Moonwater

Juana Molina - Wed 21

Sounds like John Shuttleworth on the keyboards there, Swede.

Snailhouse - Twenty One Years

Personally though, The Swede concludes, I'd like to suggest Twenty One by The Apartments. What a truly wonderful band they are.

That is very nice, I have to admit it. Doesn't exist in my own record collection (yet), which is the one stipulation to be a winner on this series. But I definitely have to investigate it further.

Where's Lynchie? Putting all his eggs in one basket this week, it seems...

Well, it's obvious the winner is Twenty-One by The Eagles.

I was very tempted, I'll admit it.

Here comes Brian, who's backing The Swede's final suggestion, but also throws in this...

The Flaming Lips - One More Robot / Sympathy 3000-21 

...which I'm glad he did, because somehow the trawl through my own 21s missed that. Here's a few more of those, if you're at all interested...

Jim Bob - Coach A Seat 21

Dave Gahan - 21 Days

Frank Black - 21 Reasons

The Charlatans - Come In, Number 21

Ash - Death Trip 21

Blink 182 - 21 Days

The Divine Comedy - 21st of May

Jeff Rosenstock - June 21st

And finally, Douglas had a couple more suggestions...

The Cranberries - 21

(Which owes quite a debt to Cyndi Lauper's Time After Time, if you ask me.)

Chuck Berry - 21 Blues

These lead us quite nicely into the subsection "Songs about being age 21", to which I can add...

The Paddingtons - 21

Jack White - Freedom At 21

Wilko Johnson & Roger Daltrey - Turned 21

The Shirelles - Twenty-One

The Lonesome Pine Fiddlers - Twenty One Years

And... of course... this, which was our opening suggestion this week, from Charity Chic, who almost begged...

The Adverts - No Time to Be 21, please, Rol.

C seconded that too, and, well... why not?

Life's short, don't make a mess of it
To the ends of the earth, you'll look for a sense in it
No chances, no plans
I'll smash the windows of my box
I'll be a madman
It's no time to be 21
To be anyone

To be honest, even though I'm not particularly enjoying 47... I don't think I'd fancy being 21 again. Would you?


And so we finally reach the Top 20. On your marks... get set...

Go!

My Top 18 Albums of 2018 #1

Here it is then, the full countdown... and a very worthy Number One.

Enjoy your New Year's Eve. Here's my youtube playlist of my albums of the year to play at your party.

18. Kate Nash - Yesterday Was Forever

17. Gretchen Peters - Dancing With The Beast

16. Death Cab For Cutie - Thank You For Today

15. The Proclaimers - Angry Cyclist

14. Alejandro Escovedo - The Crossing

13. Eels - The Deconstruction

12. Lukas Nelson & The Promise of the Real

11. Jack White - Boarding House Reach

10. Jill Jackson - Are We There Yet?

9. The Decemberists - I'll Be Your Girl

8. Amy Rigby - The Old Guys

7. Ezra Furman - Transangelic Exodus

6. Father John Misty - God's Favourite Customer

5. Half Man Half Biscuit - No One Cares About Your Creative Hub So Get Your Fuckin' Hedge Cut

4. John Grant - Love Is Magic

3. Juliana Hatfield Sings Olivia Newton John

2. Will Hoge - My American Dream

1. John Prine - Tree of Forgiveness

Back when we need him the most - warm, witty and wise. The living legend - long may he reign!

More here.



If you're going out celebrating tonight, take care and have a good one. If, like me, you'll be asleep long before the clock strikes in the new year... enjoy that too.

Thanks for reading this dribble throughout 2018. See you in 2019.

My Top 18 Albums of 2018 #11

11. Jack White - Boarding House Reach

Queen and Prince influence Jack White's most adventurous and ambitious album to date... quite simply: it's utterly bonkers.


Next, we're heading back to Scotland... are we there yet?

My Top Ten Songs That Go On And On

Work is swallowing me whole at the moment, so I don't have time to go on and on... instead here's ten tunes that can do the job for me.


10. Ben Lee - On & On

From the album Hey You, Yes You... which I think we can all agree is a great title for an album. This is a pretty cool opening line too...

Without a gun, I'd be defenceless against you...

9. Ocean Colour Scene - On And On

I've no idea why OCS get so much stick from the Muso Police. This is a lovely little tune; a b-side, I think. They deserve more respect.

8. Bowling For Soup - On And On (About You)

Aww, sweet.

If it were up to me

I'd like to buy you flowers everyday

Make everyday a holiday

Carry on and on and on about you and the things you do

The things you do

7. Jack White - On And On And On

What does Jack White do best: play the guitar, or do the production that makes his guitar playing stand out so well?

6. Wilco - On And On And On

One day we'll disappear

Together in a dream

However short or long

Our lives are going to be

5. The Longpigs - On And On

And I wish you would leave me

And I wish you would go

And I wish you didn't need me

And I wish I didn't love you so.

4. Abba - On And On And On

I think this is about as close as Abba ever got to politics...

I was at a party and this fella said to me

"Something bad is happening, I'm sure you do agree

People care for nothing, no respect for human rights

Evil times are coming, we are in for darker,"

I said, "Who are you to talk about impending doom?"

He got kinda wary as he looked around the room

He said, "I'm a minister, a big shot in the state"

I said, "I just can't believe it, boy I think it's great

Brother can you tell me what is right and what is wrong?"

He said, "Keep on rocking baby, 'til the night is gone"

3. The Feelies - On And On

Hey na na na na na na na...

2. Stephen Bishop - On And On

Poor ol'Jimmy

Sits alone in the moonlight

Saw his woman kiss another man

So he takes a ladder

Steals the stars from the sky

Puts on Sinatra and starts to cry...

1. Status Quo - Burning Bridges (On And Off And On Again)

OK, so there's a stray "off" in there, but we'll let that pass for one of the Quo's finest moments. Swing those guitars!


Feel free to go on and on in the comments if you can think of any more...