My Top Ten Glory Songs

I have finally completed my PGCE - glory, hallelujah!


10. Peter Cetera - Glory Of Love

Yes, I am a teenager of the 80s - and proud of it. 

From Karate Kid Part II, in case you were trying to remember.

The Chicago frontman has one EVIL stare in this video. Those are almost BOWIE eyes.

9. Johnny Cash - This Train Is Bound For Glory

A Woody Guthrie anthem that offers a counterpoint to our #2 song. 

8. Leonard Cohen - Morning Glory

Even by Lenny's own bizarre standards, this one's madness.

Is it censorship?
No, it's evaporation.

Ten extra marks if you can even begin to explain what this is about.

7. Ron Sexsmith - Former Glory

Classy.

6. Jon Bon Jovi - Blaze of Glory

You know you'd have moaned if this hadn't been here. Yes, you would. Don't try to deny it.

I'm a colt in your stable
I'm what Cain was to Abel
Mister Catch Me If You Can

From Young Guns Part II, in case you were trying to remember. I bet Jon By Jovi was bloody cold filming that video.

5. The Clash - Death Or Glory

Just another story...

Now every cheap hood strikes a bargain with the world
And ends up making payments on a sofa or a girl...

I suppose I could have quoted the lyric about nuns... but I'll leave that to #2.

4. Kathleen Edwards - I Make The Dough, You Get The Glory

A songwriting partnership hits the ropes. Classic Kathleen.

You're cool and cred like Fogerty
I'm Elvis Presley in the 70's
You're Chateauneuf, I'm Yellow Label
You're the buffet, I'm just the table
I'm a Ford Tempo, you're a Maserati

3. Frank Turner - Glory Hallelujah

Put your hands together for Frank's atheist gospel anthem. 

2.  Pulp - Glory Days

The closing track of the greatest album of the 90s. In My Humble Opinion.

Oh and I could be a genius if I just put my mind to it, and I,
I could do anything if only I could get round to it.
Oh, we were brought up on the Space-Race,
Now they expect you to clean toilets.
When you've seen how big the world is,
How can you make do with this?

1. Bruce Springsteen - Glory Days

One of the very best songs of the 80s. If I close my eyes and listen to it now, I can only remember the good parts of being a teenager...

Yeah, just sitting back trying to recapture a little of the glory of... 
Well, time slips away and leaves you with nothing mister 
But boring stories of glory days

Which one fills you with glory?

P.S. Glorious songs have been saved for another post. Don't mither.

My Top Ten Rave Songs

Regular readers will know that I'm no great fan of music that's made purely for shaking your bits to, especially if it's made purely for shaking your bits to whilst off your heads on E. Still, while I can't claim to be a raver, I can still spot a top rave tune... (sort of).


10. Plain White T's - Rave

Remember these guys? The Hey There, Delilah bunch? Not just one hit wonders.

9. The Wonder Stuff - A Rave From The Grave

Pretty obscure Stuffies b-side from the excellent Love Bites & Bruises collection.

8. John Moore - Ave The Rave 

Stealing the guitar riff from Elvis Costello's Pump It Up, the third member of Black Box Recorder sends mum and daddy to and early grave on this lost track from his only solo album. Lost, because I can't find a decent link to it online.

7. Cults - Rave On

You've got to be secure in your own abilities when you give your band a name that's a typing mistake waiting to happen.

6. The Courteeners - Welcome To The Rave

From their latest album, Anna, which didn't stay with me as long as I'd expected it to.

5. Jeff Buckley - Witches' Rave

A taste of what might have been from Jeff's never-completed second album, eventually released in demo form as Sketches For My Sweetheart, The Drunk.

4. The Arctic Monkeys - Ravey Ravey Ravey Club

Now, if the rave clubs of my youth had sounded like this, I'd have been there every weekend.

3. The Raveonettes - Let's Rave On

The sonic explosion caused by a collision between Buddy Holly and The Jesus & Mary Chain.

2. Jim Steinman - Stark Raving Love

Mad Jim McMad's first stab at writing Holding Out For A Hero, released on his long forgotten (but epically unforgettable) solo album, Bad For Good. I do probably overuse the word "genius" on this blog, but in Jim Steinman's case, I can never use it enough.

"Too much is never enough..." is pretty much Jim's mantra.

1. Buddy Holly - Rave On

Had to be. One minute 51 seconds of pure pop bliss. 

John Cougar Mellencamp's version is damned fine too. As is the cover by M. Ward & Zooey Deschanel.



Which one gets you raving?

My Top Ten Higher Songs

I'm here to take you higher...


10. The Cardigans - Higher

Dreamy.

9. Primal Scream - Higher Than The Sun

I find it amusing that the top youtube comment for this song is one word: "Drugs."

8. The Unbelievable Truth - Higher Than Reason

 A song about the problems caused by building a shrine in your front room... from Thom's little brother.

7. Cats On Fire - Higher Grounds

I don't approve of the band name, but the Morrissey-esque lyrics made me a fan...

Stay there for the whole day if you must.
May the seagulls take you,
Well, I don't mind.
Stay there for the whole day, you're not getting paid anyway.
Were getting tired of your antics,
Well, so am I.

6. Sly & The Family Stone - I Want to Take You Higher

This. Is. Seriously. Funky.

5. Black Grape - Get Higher

In which Shaun Ryder has fun by getting Ronald Reagan to confess to Nancy's terrible drug habit.

4. Stevie Wonder - Higher Ground

Also covered by the Red Hot Chilli Peppers, but the less said about that the better.

3. Grandmaster Flash & Melle Mel - White Lines

Get higher, baby... and don't ever come down.

On second thoughts... don't do it, Zammo!

2. Steve Winwood - Higher Love

Despite the fact that this song begins with Steve banging a bunch of pan lids in his kitchen... it's still a classic.

Various misheard mondegreens exist for this record, including "Bake me a pie of love", "Baked beans on high or low" and, my personal favourite, "Bring me an iron lung".

1. Jackie Wilson - (Your Love Keeps Lifting Me) Higher & Higher

Now once, I was downhearted
Disappointment was my closest friend...





Those were my higher loves (or iron lungs)... but which one takes you higher?

My Top Ten Landslide Songs

Having already survived an avalanche, I thought I'd try my luck with some landslides...


10. Less Than Jake - Landmines & Landslides

If you're familiar with the work of Less Than Jake, this sounds exactly like you'd expect.

9. Slash's Snakepit - Landslide

If you're familiar with the work of Slash, this sounds exactly like you'd expect.(Not always a bad thing.)

8. Alice Cooper - Generation Landslide

From the days when Alice Cooper was the name of the band.

7. Olivia Newton John - Landslide

This video is a classic example of 80s WTF?! 

It begins with Olivia as a sexy business woman (taking off her glasses) before it goes all Hammer horror with sword fights and children dressed as ninjas and then cut-price sci-fi as Olivia tries on her old Wilma Deering costume. Hence: it is genius.

I am proud to come from the generation who grew up knowing her as Olivia Neutron Bomb.

6. Tony Clarke - Landslide

Classic slab of Northern Soul.

5. Fleetwood Mac - Landslide

Stevie Nicks wrote this after an argument with Lindsey Buckingham. See also just about every other Fleetwood Mac song: whoever wrote them, they were generally about the various band members hating each other... or shagging each other... or hating each other again.

A much-covered song... see also versions by the Dixie Chicks  the Smashing Pumpkins and Tori Amos, among others.

4. AC/DC - Landslide

I want you to put your hand in your pocket
Take ten dollars out and send it to me

Loud enough to cause a landslide in solid granite.

3. The Bluetones - Mudslide

I can't shake the feeling I've featured this song before... though god knows when. Did I do a Top Ten Mud Songs?

2. Transvision Vamp - Landslide of Love

You've no idea how close Wendy came to being Number One. Probably my favourite Transvision Vamp song, even if it does rip off the theme tune to Red Dwarf at one point. (Or maybe Red Dwarf ripped this off... I can't be bothered to check which came first.)

I'll play this for my old mate Nota Bene who always gets very excited whenever I throw any TV into these lists... though not because he's a fan of their music. I expect he'll be watching this video with the sound down again, especially since Wendy James appears to have forgotten to wear the back of her dress.

1. Manic Street Preachers - Life Becoming A Landslide

Yep, I'd forgotten how good this was too.

My idea of love comes from
A childhood glimpse of pornography
Though there is no true love
Just a finely tuned jealousy

Which one gets you slip sliding away?

My Top Ten Avalanche Songs

Be very, very quiet... we're in avalanche country.

Special mention to The Avalanches and I Am The Avalanche.


10. Manafest - Avalanche

Not sure what I make of Manafest - I may just be too old. Still, points for mentioning Ghost Rider in the lyrics.

9. Matthew Good - Avalanche

No, not the bloke who played Ozymandias in Watchmen. (I did wonder, for a second.)

8. Folks - Avalanche

 Cool northern indie band who aren't getting the airplay they deserve.

7. Guided By Voices - Avalanche Aminos

Noisy nonsense, as are all the best Guided By Voices records.

6. Shawn Colvin - Shotgun Down The Avalanche

Lovely. Haunting. Special.

5. Ryan Adams - Avalanche

Like most of the songs on Love Is Hell, this sounds like a man clinging on by his fingernails.

4. Epica - Avalanche

Epica are described as a "Dutch Goth Metal Band", but for the first 2 and a bit minutes they just sound like Kate Bush fans. Then the devil voice kicks in... although only in short doses. I quite like this: it is sufficiently mental to maintain my interest for nearly 7 minutes. Jim Steinman would be proud. Plus, lead singer Simone Simons is a very pretty lady with the voice of angel. Also, unlike most of the songs on this Top Ten, this one sounds like an ACTUAL AVALANCHE!

3. James - Avalanche

James's stupid record company don't want you to hear this song, so they've blocked it from youtube. Thank god for Grooveshark.

2. Thea Gilmore - Avalanche

New Thea Gilmore album just out - good to see it getting so much attention. I haven't got my copy yet, but only because I'm skint. Thea's long been one of my favourite female singer-songwriters.

1. Leonard Cohen - Avalanche

We need more songs about hunchbacks in love. No, really, we do.

I myself am the pedestal
for this ugly hump at which you stare.

See also Nick Cave's excellent cover.




Which one buries you?