Snapshots #361: A Top Ten Existential Question Songs

Above are a series of self-portraits taken by Austrian philosopher and photographer (although he gave them both up to become a shepherd in later life), Ludwig Wittgenstein. On pondering the great unanswerable philosophical questions, Wittgenstein came up with the best answer I've ever heard when he said, "I don't know why we are here, but I'm pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves."

And with that in mind, here are some more big questions to ponder...

10. Pee Wee zeroes in on the answer.

Pee Wee zeroes...

Weezer - Why Bother?

9. When the still sea conspires an armour, and her sullen and aborted currents breed tiny monsters, true sailing is dead!

Those are the 6th Form Poetry opening lyrics of Horse Latitudes by The Doors. But I'm sure you all knew that...

Horse Latitudes - What Is More Than Life? 

8. They're new, but they've been around long enough to be considered outstanding.

Classix Nouveau - Is It A Dream?

7. More than half of Genesis were pretty good.

The first half in particular...

Gene - Why Was I Born?

6. A dreamer, in the Caribbean.  

Freddie was one of the Dreamers. Montserrat is an island in the Caribbean.

Freddie Mercury & Montserrat Caballé - How Can I Go On?

5. We're all going together, on the bus.

Coach Party - What's The Point In Life?

4. What connects Christopher Cross, Utopia, Octopus and Carter the Unstoppable Sex Machine? 

Each one contains a TOP. Add them together and you have...

Four Tops - What Is A Man?

3. Furtive canine inquiry. 

Snoop Doggy Dogg - Who Am I?

2. Oz, Raleigh, Pidgeon.

One Frank (Oz) and two Walters...

The Frank & Walters - How Can I Exist?

1. By...! What Cat's In The Cradle is about.

By George! Cats In The Cradle was about Harry's son.

George Harrison - What Is Life?

Thanks for playing. I'll be back with more existential questions for you to ponder tomorrow. 'Will Snapshots return next Saturday?' won't be one of them...

Snapshots #197 - A Top Ten Eponymous Songs

Will Florence be celebrating tonight? 

I mean... did she get 10/10 and spot the link on this week's Snapshots? Let's find out...

Here are 10 eponymous songs, where the title of the song includes the name of the performer.

10. Turner, Becker, Trout.

Frank Turner, Walter Becker & Walter Trout.

The Frank & Walters - We Are The Frank & Walters

9. Morph did this.

Living In A Box - Living In A Box

8. Gloomy tomorrow.

Black Sabbath - Black Sabbath

7. Chemistry tools.

The Pipettes - We Are The Pipettes

6. Livingstone takes his vacations on a battlefield.

Dandy Livingstone goes on War-hols.

The Dandy Warhols - The Dandy Warhols TV Theme Song

Or you could have had...

The Dandy Warhols - The Dandy Warhols Love Almost Everyone

5. Captain's Happy plus Elvis & Dave's Girls.

Captain Sensible sang Happy Talk, Dave sang Girls' Talk, which was written by Elvis.

Talk Talk - Talk Talk

4. Nelson's company?

If Willie Nelson had a company, he would call it Will-co.

Wilco - Wilco (The Song)

3. Thanked, long ago.

Anagram!

Kool & The Gang - Kool & The Gang

2. Makes his own coffee.

Grinderman - Grinderman

1. Canada.

Canada is a BIG country.

(What the hell is going on in this video? It's like The Famous Five Go On An Outward Bounds Course.)

The football might be over tonight, but Saturday Snapshots will continue next week...

Saturday Snapshot #94 - The Answers

I don't believe in Snapshots... I just believe in me.

Here's this week's answers. Thanks for playing. Well done to Lynchie for getting up first (and magnanimously leaving some for everybody else), and to Rigid Digit for hoovering up most of the others.


10. Bob the mailman has run out of numbers.

Congrats to Alyson for doing her homework.

Robert Post - Got None

9. Office worker with doll joins bandits at the station.

An office worker could be a clerk.

Guys & Dolls.

Guy Clark - Desperadoes Waiting For A Train

8. Predicting the fall of the opposite sex.

The Weather Girls - It's Raining Men

7. Old Blue Eyes meets Disney & White, following the end of everything.

Frank meets Walter Disney & Walter White... after all.

The Frank & Walters - After All

6. Johnny Marr's favourite chocolate bar gets a lift to lust.

Johnny likes an Aero to go with his Smiths.

Points to Ramone for going where others dare not tread!

Aerosmith - Love In An Elevator

Video of the week, if only for the first 20 seconds. They don't make 'em like that anymore.

5. Faustian lover becomes a Pickett, protesting sub-hairline sunburn.

Faust's lover was Gretchen.

Wilson Pickett.

Below your hairline (at the back, anyway) is your neck.

Gretchen Wilson - Redneck Woman

4. Kestrel genus swayed by wolf gang.

A kestrel is a falcon; scientific name: falco.

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart.

Falco - Rock Me, Amadeus

That never gets old.

3. He had 4: Joan, Margaret, Joan & Anne... but they're all a long, long time ago.

Joan, Margaret, Joan & Anne were the names of Shakespeare's sisters.

Shakespear's Sister - You're History

2. Overhead wires spark a half dozen warnings.

Jack White not pictured, as he only appears on this track.

Electric Six - Danger! High Voltage

1. Castaway cop looks for divine intervention over weeping sleepers.

Robinson Crusoe was a Castaway.

Smokey is a cop.

Divine intervention is a miracle.

Sleepers are what railway tracks are laid on.



Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans. But Snapshots plans to be back next Saturday, unless life gets in the way.

My Top Ten Tony Songs

The new Iron Man film is out - and it'll be great to see Robert Downey Jr. playing Tony Stark again. But can I find ten great songs about Tony?

Challenge... accepted!


10. The Frank & Walters - Tony Cochrane

The F&Ws go chasing a lilo, wishing they were their eponymous hero.

9. David Bowie - The Gospel According To Tony Day

The b-side to The Laughing Gnome.

Rotten old Tony Day - if you find a girl, he'll take her away.

8. Plans & Apologies - Tony Blair, Fucknut

'Nuff said?

7. The Pixies - Tony's Theme

This is a song about a superhero named Tony... whose name rhymes with pony. As does...

6. Morrissey - Tony The Pony

Just don't say I didn't warn you.

5. The North Sea Scrolls - I'm Not the Man You Think I am Karen, I'm the Actor Tony Allen

Luke Haines and Cathal Coughlan's alternate history of the British Isles throws up an unlikely hero in the shape of failed actor and Inspector Morse costume designer Tony Allen who leads a double life as "...the hidden hand behind the paintings of Sir Francis Bacon, the secret lover of Sid James, a patient of R.D. Laing, an assiduous curator of Northern Soul, and the probable catalyst for the least tedious stretches of the career of Fleetwood Mac..."

It's a Tony Allen world - but we just live in it. 

4. Billy Joel - Movin' Out (Anthony's Song)

One of Billy's best...

You should never argue with a crazy mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mind

...if that's movin' up - then I'm movin' out.

3. Belle & Sebastian - Lord Anthony

Anthony gets bullied at school, as did I, as I'm sure, did Stuart Murdoch. Bullying is evil.

When will you realize it doesn't pay
To be smarter than teachers, smarter than most boys?

"So shut your mouth, start kicking the football."
Bang on the teeth. You are off for a week, boy.

2. Patty Griffin - Tony

More bullying... with tragic consequences this time. Patty recalls the suicide of an old highschool classmate... heartbreaking stuff: and yet, it rocks.

I hated every day of high school
It's funny, I guess you did too

1. The Shirehorses (M&M) - Tony

I love Stan, I think it's one of Eminem's best songs... but I can't hear it anymore without wanting to listen to Mark & Lard's hilarious parody.

Anyway, how the kcuf are you?
I'm alright, thanks for asking
I'm listening to the new album 
By Dave Stewart and that old Barbara Gaskin

Listen to Stan first, then listen to Tony... and if you don't laugh your boils off, I'll give you your money back. (Plus, the woman from the canteen beats Dido any day.)




Which one gets your Tony award?

My Top Ten Fashion Songs

From the least fashionable music blog on the net... a load of elegant, diaphonous, off-the-shoulder sartorial tosh. 

10. Campag Velocet - Bon Chic Bon Genre

Remember Campag Velocet? The NME tried to convince us they were in fashion back in 1999.

They weren't.

9. We Smoke Fags - Passion For Fashion

Gets in on the strength of the band name alone. Much better name than Campag Velocet.

8. Eels - Fashion Awards

E pops down to the fashion show, and if he doesn't win an award for best hair, well...

We'll blow off our heads in despair

7. The Frank & Walters - Fashion Crisis Hits New York

The very definition of "lost classic".

Well, fashion it moves on and on
While the things we've bought
Have been hardly worn
I still like my old three-piece suite but
It's in the shed and I've got no seat
Oh no no

6. Madonna - Vogue

Around this time, Madonna started to believe her own hype. She made some very bad decisions in the 90s and was never the same again. Still, it's a great pop song... so good, Lady Gaga couldn't help but rip it off.

5. The National - Fashion Coat

As with most songs by The National, I don't have clue one what it's about. Good though.

4. Flight of the Conchords - Fashion Is Danger

Bret & Jemaine bring us a (timely) warning about fashion from the 80s...

P-P-P-P-President Reagan
Th-Th-Th-Thatcher
Jazzercise
L-L-L-Lipgloss

3. Suede - She's In Fashion

It's good to have Suede back, and sounding as fashionable as they did when they recorded this.

2. David Bowie - Fashion

Dave takes the piss.

Fashion! Turn to the left
Fashion! Turn to the right
Oooh, fashion!
We are the goon squad and we're coming to town
Beep-beep
Beep-beep

1. The Kinks - Dedicated Follower of Fashion

Eagerly pursuing all the latest fads and trends, 

One week he's in polka-dots, the next week he's in stripes. 

His world is built 'round discoteques and parties. 

In matters of the cloth he is as fickle as can be,

I know, it could almost have been written about me.

Not likely. Still, at least I'm not a dedicated swallower of fascism... as Billy famously paraphrased Ray.



Darling! You look marvelous! What are you wearing?