My favourite song by Australian country singer Kasey Chambers is her Number 1 (Aussie chart) hit from 2002, Not Pretty Enough. Although Chambers was in her mid-20s when she wrote the song, it's the perfect insecure teenage lament...
This song came back to me when I heard its unofficial Mid-Life Crisis sequel from Linda Thompson.
As you may or may not be aware, due to a condition called spasmodic dysphonia, Linda is unable to sing anymore. That seems particularly cruel when you remember just how beautiful her voice used to be...
Anyway, Linda hasn't let this stop her putting out a new record, late last year. She just got friends and family to do the singing. Fortunately, she has some very talented friends and family, including son Teddy, daughter Kami, ex-husband Richard... plus the Wainwrights (Rufus and Martha), the Proclaimers and the Unthanks. In a stroke of genius, she even got John Grant to sing a song all about... John Grant. That really shouldn't work, but it does.
The stand out track though is the one sung by Manchester's Ren Harvieu. It could be heard as a woman lamenting the loss of her youthful beauty... but I'm guessing it's more a metaphor for the loss of that beautiful voice we heard earlier...
The album's called Proxy Music, which explains the reason Linda's chosen to dress and pose the way she has on the cover.
I had to go outside my record collection to find one more track for this Top 10. This chunk of Swedish guitar noise will fit the bill nicely, thanks. It beats Iggy & Slash for lyrical reasons.
All the things that you have ever said All the people you've taken to bed All the books that you have ever read All the papers that you've ever shred
All the cigarettes you've ever smoked All the times you've ever told a joke All the people that you've ever met All the times you've ever been upset
All the girls that ever broke your heart All the things that you have torn apart All the music that you've ever heard All the times you've been at loss for words....
Another band I thought would be bigger than they actually were. Saw them in support, or at a festival, and bought their CD right there. This was one of their best tracks. Pretty cool video too.
Don’t waste your time cause we’re all gonna die Have fun, and everybody just clap your hands, yes Get out of your bed and get your music on Get out on the street and get some living done I think you'll probably live beyond the end of the week You've got enough time left so come spend it with me
A great little indie band from a few years back who only the blogosphere appeared to love. Shame. They have some strong tunes. And I like some of the suggestions they have for crazy ways to go: particularly "hit by a plane... while you're cycling". The Proclaimers would appreciate that.
From the album of the same name. Cheery bunch. Although this is a much sweeter song than the title suggests... it's the perfect antidote to all those songs about "oh, life on the road is so tough now we're a famous band".
So try not to get upset Everything is fine Hey, it's not that big a deal We're all gonna die
1. Malcolm Middleton - We're All Going To Die
Released as a Christmas single (and therefore one of the greatest Christmas singles ever released) though apart from having MM dressed as a very bad Santa in the video, it has absolutely nothing to do with Christmas...
And what if I don't become Famous posthumously? Maybe my story's no good
If I can take one posession It'll have to be my duvet When oblivion comes calling it'll be So cold
In the UK, we're currently struggling to cope with this long-forgotten concept (some of us remember it from our childhoods, but most had started to believe it a myth) of "summer". Our native insect population is certainly having a field day, with flying ants invading Wimbledon and huge butterflies and dragonflies being sighted in gardens across the country.
What better reason to dig out ten top tunes about dragonflies?
Early Mac, after Peter Green's departure, when Danny Kirwan was briefly in charge. This is his song, though the lyrics are from a poem by W.H. Davies. Christine McVie had just joined the Mac and can be heard on backing vocals. God, this band must surely have the most convoluted history in the whole of rock!
Ironically, today has been a very good day. I took my son out of pre-school and we had a boys' day out. There was ice cream, ducks, sculpture an enormous tower (bigger than the Eiffel Tower, it turns out, and only about 20 minutes from home).
Anyway, I wrote this one last week. So if your day hasn't been as good as mine, here's ten songs to help you feel better... and no Daniel Powter!
Great song from The Charlies' 2008 album You Cross My Path: sounds like The White Stripes meets The Cure. I'll play this one for Charity Chic who snoozed and lost on the Charlies front this week.
An anthem for the everyman... courtesy of a band who are anything but.
You're sorta stuck where you are But in your dreams you can buy expensive cars Or live on Mars And have it your way
And you hate your boss at your job Well, in your dreams you can blow his head off In your dreams Show no mercy!
1. R.E.M. - Bad Day
Classic REM. It wasn't officially released until 2003 as an extra rack / single on a Best Of, but the roots of this song go back to the band's earliest days. A version was originally performed in 1985 when the media and the president were obviously in need of a kicking. Although as time goes by, you almost wish Ronnie would come back...
A public service announcement followed me home the other day I paid it nevermind. Go away. Shit so thick you could stir with a stick- free Teflon whitewashed presidency We're sick of being jerked around Wear that on your sleeve Broadcast me a joyful noise unto the times, lord, Count your blessings. We're sick of being jerked around We all fall down.
I hope one of these made your day a little better...
Almost as soon as I posted Volume 1, my old friend Sally started protesting on Facebook. I'm sure she won't mind if I share her rant with you all now...
"Rol.
Rol. Rol, Rol, Rol, Rol, Rol, Rol, Rol, Rol... Where are all the
tear-streaked, self-hating women you introduced me to? What of Not
Pretty Enough? Footsteps Fall? Bloody Mother-Fucking Asshole? Maybe
that's not strictly self pity, but it sure felt like it to me. If you do
this again it should feature the mascara-streaked, the unnoticed
despite hours of prep, the gin-soaked, the Laydeez"
Well, who am I to refuse such a heartfelt plea? And yes, Sally was right: I was remiss in making Volume 1 all about miserable fellas. (Although I had forgotten just how much I used to share the misery with anyone and everyone way back when Sally and I worked in the same office.) And so, to redress the balance...
The thing about mining a rich seam like self-pity is that way down at Number Nine you'll find songs which would have been Number One on any other Top Ten. There's a brutal simplicity to Lucinda Williams' lyrics here, each line repeated over and over to hammer home the point...
Heavy blankets Heavy blankets Heavy blankets Cover lonely girls
But the kicker comes at the end when Lucinda reveals: she knows of what she writes.
Whenever I listen to the Carpenters, I'm reminded of John Cusack's opening monologue to High Fidelity... what came first: the music or the misery? Makes you wonder about poor, tragic Karen...
I'll say goodbye to love No one ever cared if I should live or die Time and time again the chance for love has passed me by And all I know of love Is how to live without it I just can't seem to find it
So I've made my mind up I must live my life alone And though it's not the easy way I guess I've always known I'd say goodbye to love...
I'll admit, when Sally suggested this one, I wasn't sure it fit the criteria. The titular "hero" is Loudon Wainwright III, and on the surface this is just Martha's semi-tongue-in-cheek attack on her father's longstanding habit of writing extremely autobiographical (if highly amusing) songs about his family... though frankly, Martha got off light compared to Rufus. But when you delve a bit deeper, it is gloriously miserable in its own way, and despite being one of her earliest songs, it might be Martha's finest hour.
And you have no idea
No idea how it feels to be on your own In your own home With the fucking phone And the mother of gloom In your bedroom Standing over your head With her hand in your head With her hand in your head
I will not pretend I will not put on a smile I will not say I'm all right for you When all I wanted was to be good To do everything in truth To do everything in truth
Now here's someone who really has a reason to feel self-pity. The sequel to the equally spectacular Love Child, here we find Ross's self-hating heroine moving away from home to escape the shame of being born in poverty to a "slum mum"... only to drown in guilt when that deserted and disowned mother dies lonely and heartbroken while her daughter parades around university pretending to come from a wealthy family.
Got a telegram
Mama passed away while making home made jam
before she died she cried to see me by her side
She always did her best
Ah cooked and cleaned and always in the same old dress
Working hard, down on her knees
Always trying to please
Mama, mama, mama can you hear me?
Mama, mama, mama can you hear me?
I'm living in shame
Mama, I miss you
I know you've done your best
Mama, I miss you
This song utterly destroys me. In a very good way.
I was going to disqualify this on the basis that it's written by two blokes (John Moore and Luke Haines), but then I realised it's not the only song like that in this list. Besides, it's the performance that matters, and Sarah Nixey makes this her own.
There is no creature in the known universe more well-versed in the fine art of self-pity than your average teenager, and our Top Three today demonstrates that perfectly with three slightly-older ladies turning to their teenage selves for devastating inspiration. Here Kasey Chambers turns romantic desperation into an artform, and then wonders...
Why do you see right through me?
That said, she's a novice when compared to the all-time champion of channeling teenage angst into a pop song...
At Seventeen may well have been written about the horrors of being a teenage girl... but sadly, most of the lyrics recall my own teenage woe with clinical precision...
To those of us who knew the pain Of valentines that never came And those whose names were never called When choosing sides for basketball It was long ago and far away The world was younger than today When dreams were all they gave for free To ugly duckling girls like me
1. The Shangri-Las - Past, Present And Future
Melodrama on a supremely epic scale was the Shangri-Las' stock in trade, and they certainly turned it up to 11 on this 1966 ode to joylessness. Set to Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata, it sticks a dagger into teenage heartbreak unlike any other record you'll ever hear. Sublime.
No surprise to find both Morrissey & Marr were fans...
That's Volume 2 out of the way. I hope you realise this series could run and run. Especially if you keep encouraging me. Misery does love company...
Special mentions to Brick (above), Edie Brickell, L7's album Bricks Are Heavy and Kate Nash's album Made of Bricks. Extra special mention to the one that got away (because it was too damned loud even for me, Bob!): Bricklayer by Hüsker Dü. Don't listen to that one with headphones on.
Sometimes you just have to start with the obvious choice.
But Pink Floyd, man... why don't I get Pink Floyd?
I mean, I listen to this and, of course, it's a classic of its age and reminds me very much of the days when it was being played heavily on the radio. And I like the message behind it, I like the bassline, I like the guitar... they even make the children's choir work, which is a rarity in rock songs.
Still, despite all that, and despite numerous attempts to get into their back catalogue, the Floyd have never quite made their mark on me. Perhaps I need a little education... or at the very least, a little thought control.
And if that wasn't enough proggy-concept weirdness for one Top Ten, here's Ian Anderson with (possibly, not definitely) the longest track I've ever featured here... all 44 crazy minutes of Tull's flute-tastic "satire" of concept albums, only one track (split over two sides on the original LP but edited together later)... but that's the point, man.
I have to confess, I was only familiar with the 3 1/2 minute edit from Tull's Greatest Hits album till today, but in the interests of completeness, I have dedicated myself to listening to the whole thing while I type this post. And it's actually quite groovy. Which only goes to prove...
On the other hand, Iggy is someone I have more and more time for the older I get. This is pretty late era Iggy in that it's only from 26 years ago, but while more focus is given to his 70s heyday, there are real gems in his 80s and 90s work too... hell, that new album produced by Josh Homme earlier in the year sounded pretty cool too.
You know I love The Jam, but occasionally Weller chucks subtlety out the window and crosses the line between Angry Young Man and Whinging Old Git. He even kicks off this track from the debut Jam album by telling us (not showing us) what the song's going to be about ("Bricks and mortar, reflecting social change") before wittering on like an Our Price Victor Meldrew about them knocking down houses to build car parks "while hundreds are homeless". Hardly Joni Mitchell, Paul.
What I like best about Bricks & Mortar though is the second verse...
Why do they have to knock them down
And leave the site dormant for months on end?
Who has the right to make that choice?
A man whose home has cost forty grand!
Those rich bastards in their forty grand mansions - you stick it to 'em, Weller!
Lionel Ritchie takes a back seat while Commodores drummer Walter "Clyde" Orange brings the vocal funk to this single from the band's 1977 debut album.
The clothes she wears, her sexy ways Make an old man wish for younger days, yeah, yeah She knows she's built and knows how to please Sure enough to knock a strong man to his knees
Shamelessly sexist lyrics, you might think - although they were actually written by a woman, Shirley Hanna-King, the wife of founding Commodore William King. So perhaps you might see this as a female empowerment anthem... or at the very least another in the long line of records praising Plus Size Ladies (there's got to be a Top Ten in that). The title is a radio friendly version of the expression Placebo used in full on this cool tune from their 1998 album Without You, I'm Nothing.
Kasey Chambers has a sound reminiscent of a lot of young contemporary Country heroines (think Kacey Musgraves or Taylor Swift before she went pop and shacked up with Loki). But she's actually Australian and a little longer in the tooth than the aforementioned ladies: this is from her second album, released in 2001, back when I dug her a lot. I've not heard any of her more recent efforts: really must try harder.
Jazzy, finger-snapping goodness from an American swing band who released only two albums in the late 90s... though they sound like they come from 50 years before that.
I've been listening to the new Mull Historical Society record a lot lately and I can't get the opening track out of my head. It's Colin MacIntyre's 7th album release since MHS's 2001 debut Loss (although a couple were released under his own name) and it continues his winning streak when it comes to writing catchy alternative pop songs. People bang on about the state of the music industry and there's no denying it would be good to see MacIntyre become a household name, but it's still reassuring that an artist like this can maintain a career in today's pop quagmire, even if it has to be largely under his own steam... he's even branched out into novel writing now as well!
1. Ben Folds - Brick
When it was released in 1997, Brick was unlike any other record Ben Folds had recorded to that point. He'd made a name for himself with cheeky, uptempo piano-stomping tunes that sounded like Jerry Lee Lewis gone indie. And this was a straightforward ballad that became a crossover hit and had his fanbase crying "sell out" at the same time. Although perhaps not too loudly once they listened to the lyrics...
Brick is a song about abortion: but weirdly neither pro- or anti-abortion, it just tells a story from the perspective of a young couple who've been through it... as Folds and his high school girlfriend did years earlier. Nothing to do with bricklaying then, but I make the rules up as I go along and may the best songs win...
Off the top of your hod... which one would be your favourite?
Brett
Anderson's songwriting has always combined glitter and grubbiness, so
an ode to the capital city of both seemed inevitable.
9. Kasey Chambers - Hollywood
Kasey laments the fact that real life ain't like the movies. A cliche, perhaps... but that voice!
One of the more interesting new records I've discovered this year comes from ex-Fleet Fox J. Tillman aka Father John Misty. This is a standout track from his debut album (as FJM), Fear Fun.
Comic book fan David Gedge obviously didn't think Hollywood's version of Spider-Man measured up to the one he read as a kid. And of course, he turns that into a metaphor for disappointing relationships.
Look, if you don't like Billy Joel... you don't like music. The Phil Spector-esque production on this BJ classic proved irresistible to Phil's ex, lead Ronette Ronnie Spector who went on to record her own version... with a little help from the legendary E Street Band.
Sometimes side projects prove more exciting than an artist's day job. Codeine Velvet Club was the brainchild of lead Fratelli Jon Lawler and Glasgow club singer Lou Hickey. The male/female harmonies and big 60s production numbers they created on the band's 2009 debut album promised great things... though sadly, it doesn't seem they're destined to work together again.
1. Bob Seger & The Silver Bullet Band - Hollywood Nights
One of beardy-Bob's bristling best.
In those Hollywood nights
In those Hollywood hills
She was looking so right
In her diamonds and frills
All those big city nights
In those high rolling hills
Above all the lights
She had all of the skills
So, the Olympics is over and so are my Olympic Top Tens. If you'd asked me three weeks ago if I'd had enough of the Olympics yet, I'd probably have answered 'yes'. Yet, amazingly, I found myself suckered in, addicted to sports I've never had the remotest interest in before (not football though - I still found that dull). I'm really missing the Games now they're done - there's a hole in my life. I just couldn't get enough...
"Enough" is one of those words: the more you look at it, the weirder it looks. There's not enough time to list all my favourite Not Enough Songs, so Ten will just have to be... enough.
You may have expected to find this at Number One... but although it is the Mode's most well known single, and a great singalong radio hit, it's not one of my favourites. The band have made far better records and this one's just a little over-played compared to the rest of their back catalogue. IMHO.
The ultimate question of unrequited teenage love - "Am I not pretty enough? Why do you see right through me?" If you've never been there, count yourself lucky. Or arrogant and self-deluded.
1. Manic Street Preachers & Nina Persson - Your Love Alone Is Not Enough
One of the Manic's best ever singles, from a point in their career when most bands have given up trying so hard.
