There was an excellent response to my requests for songs called Goodbye as a tribute to the late WYCRA blog. To remind you, the rules were simple... all you had to do was come up with songs called Goodbye.
Oh, by the way, I've abritrarily changed the scoring system...
1 point for every one of my songs you identify.
2 points for being the first to identify a song.
3 points if you can guess a song's position in my Top Ten.
1 bonus point if you suggest a song that's better than one in my Top Ten.
Clear? (As mud.)
Let's start with the elephant in the room, shall we? Goodbye-ee by Peter Cook & Dudley Moore. Being a little bit younger than many of you (sorry), I wasn't familiar with this at all. In fact, when it was suggested - by The Swede, Martin and C - I actually thought the Goodbye-ee in question must be this one. Anyway, I apologise for not having been born when Pete & Dud were on TV. You can all have a point for your advancing years.
Quite a few of you also thought Mary Hopkin might make the grade. I didn't have that in my collection but vaguely remembered it when I gave it a listen. A jaunty enough 60's tune... with the aloft thumbprint of Macca all over it. Can't say I preferred it to any of my Ten though. A bit too jaunty. I will give The Swede a point for suggesting Macca's demo version because - somewhat surprisingly - I found that quite nice.
Next... The Spice Girls? How many of you suggested the bleeding Spice Girls? Really? What is this, Smash Hits? I'm sorry, I know my record collection has some very bizarre corners, but there is no Spice Girls. Even I draw the line somewhere.
The Swede also wondered if Shed Seven would be there. They came close, but it wasn't one of their most memorable efforts in my humble opinion. (Still better than anything Oasis ever did.) I'll give The Swede an extra point for The Universe though, which I was rather taken with. Couldn't find a properly recorded version of Jon Rae & The River, so I'm on the fence about that. As for Kevin Shields' instrumental Goodbye from Lost In Translation... nice and atmospheric, but instrumentals have to work very hard to get on one of my charts.
C trawled the interweb to come up with Miley Cyrus (now if it was Billy Ray, you might have been in with a chance, C: Billy Ray was a guest voice on Blaze & The Monster Machines the other day... so good to see him still getting work), Avril Lavigne (who's obviously working for Anne Summers now if the video is anything to go by), Alicia Keys and MØ. Obviously you think I'm a 16 year old girl, C, rather than a 45 year old boy. Still, you can have a point for each of those purely because they were all better than The Spice Girls. Alyson can have a point for Avril Lavigne too because I don't want anyone to go away pointless.
Other decent-ish suggestions came thick and fast... but no points for The Pretenders (from the soundtrack of G.I. Jane!) or Northern Uproar (a Northern Uproar b-side: you don't hear those every day). Sadly, I couldn't find Walter's Tracy Chapman offering anywhere on youtube, but I'm sure it's lovely. You can have a point for suggesting something I couldn't find, Walter.
Thanks all for taking part... though you only managed to guess half my Top Ten in the end...
Nobody suggested this. You must all just be Pretty In Pinkers. Even if you're only familiar with that track and nothing else by the Furs though, this is unmistakably them.
I'm going to give Martin a point for Frank Sinatra, even though he went for this Goodbye, a completely different song, and one that's definitely better recorded. I prefer the lyrics of this one though, with Frank enjoying a coffee and a slice of cheesecake while gets the elbow.
Well done to Martin again, who wins 2 points for Elton (I'm sure he'll be so proud). Madman Across The Water is my favourite album by Reg.
A late entry from George gets him a point for this too.
I will also give Martin a point for having the gall to suggest Def Leppard. I wasn't familiar with that one. It's hardly in the same league as Let's Get Rocked.
And I'll give him two points for Air Supply, because he'll never live that down.
Well done to Charity Chic for guessing this one. 2 points. An extra point for suggesting Mary Gauthier - I didn't know that one from Mary, but it's rather lovely.
2 points to Chris for being the first to suggest this. Three points each to The Swede and Martin who both predicted it would be Number 2. Bloody good going, even though you were wrong about my Number One.
You may recall that the WYCRA guys would, on occasion, allow the inclusion of a song which repeated their requested word. In their honour - and because it's Billy Bragg - I had to follow their guidance.
Following the same rules, I may have found room for The Swede's suggestion of Gudbuy Gudbuy, but Noddy Holder's spelling always keeps him behind after my class.
Brian can have a point for suggesting Oingo Boingo's Goodbye Goodbye though... because it's Oingo Boingo. Brian had some other great suggestions too, but soon realised he wasn't following the rules so said Goodbye.
Points? Maths never was my strong point, but I think...
Brian - 1 point
Walter - 1 point
Alyson - 1 point George - 1 point
Chris - 2 points
Charity Chic - 3 points
C - 5 points
The Swede - 8 points
Martin - 11 points
Congratulations to Martin then, who wins my undying admiration. I really enjoyed doing this, and thank you all for taking part. It did bring home to me just how much time such a feature takes to put together though: more credit then to WYCRA and Jez who have both done such things on a regular basis. If I ever did anything like it again... and I am rather tempted, because everyone seems to enjoy playing along at home... I'd have to make it a monthly feature. Weekly would kill me.
When I started doing these Top Tens on the old blog... probably about seven or eight years ago now... they were mostly full of indie bands. That's rarely the case these days, but every now and then a topic seems to bring them out of the woods.
Here's ten songs asking / telling you to 'Come Home!' Next week, a reply post - ten 'I'm Coming Home!' songs. (So save those for then.)
Special mention to Darlene Love's Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) which would have made the Top Three if I allowed Christmas songs in March...
A night out in London makes the Rakes want to go home. Amusing lyrics on this one.
In the bar your mates spot a celebrity
But you're not fussed by the gay guy off CBBC
Limos ferry hen-nights to the West End
The night is dragging it's heels to the end
Now he's in your face
"Got any drugs on you mate?"
You get out for some peace
Still get home by half 3 (leave the city and come home)
The opening track on Placebo's debut, back in the grand old days of 1996. Brian Molko described this one as "pop punk for postponed suicides". But he always was a bit of a one.
Very cool song from the highly acclaimed new LP from The Charlatans (which I have out on loan from the local library at the moment - and yes, it's pretty cool)... though I don't think Tim Burgess has looked like he does in this video for a LONG time now.
A typically quirky story single about an international business traveller (with a pigeon head in the video) who wakes up after a wild night of debauchery and has to make it home in time for his son's big football game. Only Neil Hannon could have written this one.
Though they only ever released two albums, Roland Gift's Fine Young Cannibals are fondly remembered round these parts. Mixing jangly guitars and a nice bit of brass with Gift's soul singer tonsils, they made some of the most distinctive pop songs of the 80s. This was their debut single from 1985, the year Marty McFly first travelled back in time.
1. James - Come Home
After 8 years knocking around the indie charts, James finally started to bother the real Top 40 in 1990. It was a dark time for decent music and James offered everything we needed in a pop band - big hooks, heartfelt choruses and a bonkers frontman. Come Home equalled its predecessor, How Was It For You, making Number 32 with a bullet... but it was a start, and not soon after Sit Down broke them into the Top Ten. Come Home is probably a better song though, with its wailing sirens, impassioned pleading and Tim Booth waving a big stick around in the desert-set video. And it still sounds fresh 25 years later...
See, I do take requests. (If you'd like to suggest a Top Ten subject, you know where the comments box is.) This one goes out to my old blogging pal Nota Bene who's been having a bit of trouble with his keys lately. Originally, I thought I might split it into two lists: songs about door keys and songs about musical keys... then I decided I'd be scraping the barrel a bit to fill 20 spaces. So they're all mixed in together here.
And if you're wondering where Melanie is... I'm saving her for another Top Ten. (Ditto, The Wurzels, but you might have to wait a bit longer for that one.)
Special mention to The Black Keys, The Mar-Keys and Stevie Wonder's Songs In The Key of Life.
You are so crazy
Should be under lock and key
You've got to be the worst thing
That's every happened to me
But I don't get angry
Got my skeleton key
I can open every door that
Stands in front of me
I tried to resist any metaphorical key songs - all the other songs on this list are about musical keys or keys that open locks. But this is really funky, and it's much better than the Urban Cookie Collective.
Sounds like the theme tune to Magic Roundabout turned into a psychedelic indie-pop song. Video looks like it was made by a bunch of 6th form Media Studies students. Therefore: brilliant.
No idea what this one's about, but as with a lot of Okkervil River records, it bounces along like a Barnes Wallis.
I'm a rich young sophisticate, I've got girls and friends.
I'm doing what I really like and getting paid for it.
There is no key, there's no plan; well, I discovered that.
And, truly, I don't think you'll find a happier man.
What can you say about a song like this? It probably should be number one. But when I'm comparing apples with Fabergé eggs, putting songs in Top Ten order becomes impossible.
I'm gonna park my romance right alone the curb Hang a sign upon my heart "Please don't disturb"' And if I never fall in love again That's soon enough for me
I'll happily argue my case that in Fore!, Huey Lewis produced one of the Top Five pop albums of the 80s. But how do you follow an album as perfect - and packed with classic radio hits - as that? Well, the truth is, he couldn't. I have a great fondness for Fore!'s follow-up, Small World, but nobody could claim it to be a great record. And this, the album's big single, isn't fit to be mentioned in the same breath as The Power of Love, Stuck With You or Hip To Be Square. It kind of marks the point where the 80s started to go bad, musically. But I still love it in its own quirky way... and the video is hilariously awful. Huey always did some great comedy expressions.
Another never-before-recorded Woody Guthrie composition, brought to life by Billy & Tweedy from the Mermaid Avenue sessions.
Ain't nobody that can sing like me...
Too true, Billy.
1. Kathleen Edwards - The Cheapest Key
A great F-u song, possibly aimed at a former songwriting / romantic partner (though t'internet lets me down on revealing just who deserves Kathleen's ire). Definitely one of her best, anyway... and the video's an absolute belter, proving that in a sane world Ms. Edwards would be a star of Pink-like proportions.
I was wondering when a new record might be arriving from one of my favourite Canadians, but iffypedia informs me she's taking time off music to open a coffee shop. Which is great news for the caffeine-fiend residents of Stittsville, Ottawa... but a cold cup of dregs for the rest of us.
See also Copied Keys, another fine record from the divine Ms. E. She wins this one hands down.
Which one has the key to your heart? And which one gets stuck in your lock?
Many, many years ago, when they had such things, my mum used to be a switchboard operator. The stories she could tell about the things she heard! Do we even still have operators? I can't imagine too many people dedicating a song to a pre-recorded "virtual switchboard". Press one for "the romance is dead".
Special mention to Operator Please, the band who recorded the amazing Just A Song About Ping Pong and The Operator by The Coral, which is actually about getting kidnapped and operated on by a bunch of psycho surgeons. Or something.
Ever fallen in love with a video you shouldn't have?
Wikipedia informs me that if you play the arcade game Dance Dance Revolution, you get to dance to this song... in an arcade. Glad I don't believe anything I read on wikipedia.
Dennis keeps trying to get through to Sylvia. Her mother just wants him to leave her alone. The operator keeps demanding "forty cents more" to continue the conversation "for the next three minutes".
1. Tom Waits - Martha
I almost gave this one to Dr. Hook, which would have been suitably anti-cool of me. But then I remembered this...
Operator, number please It´s been so many years And she´ll remember my old voice While I fight the tears Hello, hello there, is this Martha ? This is old Tom Frost And I am calling long distance Don´t worry ´bout the cost...
Tom Waits sounds like a weary old man on this recording. The scary / crazy thing is, he was 24 years old when it was released...
Those are the songs that get me calling the operator - but which one would be your hold music of choice?
