Cathy's Clown was the biggest hit of the Everly Brothers' career, spending five weeks at Number One in the US, seven weeks at Number One in the UK, and selling over 8 million copies worldwide.
Phil and Don argued over who wrote it, though the tune was allegedly nicked from a section of The Grand Canyon Suite by American composer Ferde Grofé. I had a listen and couldn't hear any similarity myself. The Everly's close harmony singing style was particularly influential on The Beatles (who iffypedia says "once toyed with the idea of calling themselves The Foreverly Brothers", but I'm not sure I believe that). There's certainly a similarity between Cathy's Clown and The Beatles' debut single...
All of which brings us to a man who also named himself after a song: John Wesley Hardin. Here he is in 1990 with his own sequel to the Everly Brothers' smash...
Did anybody actually drink coffee in the 70s and early 80s? Everyone I knew drank tea from an early age, but the only coffee you could get was that nasty freeze-dried stuff, and although there might have been a jar in the cupboard, I think it was only there for if we had a weird workman in.
By the time I reached my late teens, I was drinking a lot of tea. A large teapot full every night. And because I don't like milk, I was drinking it black and strong. Three bags.
I've written before about how I was invited in for coffee after my first date, and I didn't even like coffee, but coffee was all that was on offer. I'm covering old grounds here (you see what I did there?), but I ended that post by explaining that I finally ended up a coffee drinker when I started using the Klix vending machine to keep me awake on nightshift. There weren't a lot of great options from that machine. The tea was white only - at least you could get coffee black. Beyond that, there was a hot lemon drink that tasted like wallpaper stripper... and a sub-sub-Bovril effort that I once tried in desperation and can still taste how disgusting it was 30+ years later.
I don't know when I first tried a proper coffee, maybe as an after dinner treat in a restaurant, but it changed my life forever. Nowadays, there are more coffee shops in the UK than there are pubs, but back then there were hardly any. The interweb tells me that coffee shop culture was a big thing in the swinging '60s but died away when people discovered instant coffee in the 70s and 80s. This confirms something I've long suspected: the general public are idiots.
Various articles online suggest that the UK coffee shop resurgence happened in the 1990s as a result of young Brits watching the Friends characters hang out in Central Perk. It may seem hard to believe now, but the first UK Starbucks didn't open till 1998. I'm not particularly a fan of Starbucks - a bit too close in texture to the Klix Vending Machine Gravy - but I will drink it as a last resort. Unlike Neil Young...
My preferred chain, Caffè Nero, opened its first in that London in 1997, so I'm guessing they didn't get to the rest of the UK till well into the noughties. I remember when the Bradford branch opened; I was working radio advertising and it became a daily ritual to walk across Bradford in the afternoon for a proper Americano. By then, I was pretty much a coffee addict.
That addiction only grew when I became a teacher, but all that caffeine clearly wasn't doing a lot to help with the anxiety caused by the pressure of working at The Bad Place.
Nowadays I'm mostly a two coffees a day man, and visits to coffee shops have become a luxury rather than a necessity... who can afford at nearly £4 a pop? That said, I always feel more relaxed in a coffee shop than I ever felt in a pub. Even when I was a drinker, I found pubs to be intimidating places. And not just because of the stress of getting served at a crowded bar. I know I'm in the minority here - most people find pubs to be welcoming places, but I never felt like I belonged... even when I was handing over a small fortune for a double Jack Daniels and Coke. (I dread to think how much my former beverage of choice costs these days... one more reason to be grateful for being tee-total.)
My dad became a coffee drinker later in life, and I wonder if my love of strong black coffee was in some way an attempt to emulate or connect with him? Although Sam's way too young to indulge, he spends a lot of time in coffee shops with me... in the same way I guess many parents might have taken their kids into family pubs when they were growing up, to acclimatise them to that culture. Although he liked a pint of lager and lime from time to time, my dad wasn't a big drinker and I never went to the pub with him.
Every Saturday morning, about ten a.m. (once the Snapshots excitement has died down), Sam and I stop off at the local Co Op cafe before starting the weekly shop. I have an Americano, Sam has an Appletiser, and we both have a pastry. We sit and talk... it's good father and son time. The highlight of my week.
It wouldn't be my coffee shop of choice... but any excuse to watch this video again...
Seymour Stein died on the 2nd of April, aged 80. Not a household name, but a hugely important man in the history of popular music. Without him, we might never have heard The Ramones. Or the Talking Heads. Or Madonna. The Pretenders. Ice T. Yeah, someone else might have signed them, but it might not have been someone with Stein's vision, and they might have fallen through the cracks as a result. I'm sure we can all think of a favourite artist who deserved to be as big as the names above, but who never had the right person to push them to the top. Stein also helped a lot of British bands break through in America, including The Cure, Depeche Mode, Echo & The Bunnymen and The Smiths. Although he wouldn't sign Belle & Sebastian. Which is why Stuart Murdoch wrote this...
Seymour Stein, I've been lonely
I caught a glimpse of someone's face
It was mine and I'd been crying
Half a world away
Ticket for a plane
Record company man
I won't be coming to dinner
I heard dinner went well
You liked Chris's jacket
He reminded you of Johnny
Before he went Electronic
Where else will we find Seymour Stein commemorated in song? Let's start with the arched eyebrow of Stephin Merritt...
Rheostatics are considered one of the most influential Canadian rock bands, even though they never troubled the singles chart much. Forming in 1978, they eventually signed to Sire in the early 90s.
Another Canadian musician now... but one who's got slightly less chance of being signed if this drivel is anything to go by. (I'm guessing he's being ironic.)
The Pocket Gods might have stood more of a chance... if they could have written any songs that were longer than 45 seconds. (Then again, what do I know - maybe that's the TikTok future.)
Although Belle & Sebastian were today's obvious winner, I was also rather taken by this track by Florida indie band Surfer Blood. So let's close with them today...
Roll your sleeves to show off your tattoos
He's great friends with Seymour Stein, I never knew
Master reels from Zeppelin I and II
Once the Kraken has been fed then everything's cool
Jet Black has, but I wasn't about to go sifting through all the lyrics that feature his name to work out if any of them are actually referring to him. (Although, if you're interested, he does get referenced in Rocket by Def Leppard.) RIP, Jet, anyway.
No, I had a non-RIP reason for including Jeff Lynne in the jukebox this week... which will become apparent at the end of the post.
Meanwhile...
The Idle Race. The Move. The Electric Light Orchestra. The
Travelling Wilburys. That’s as much introduction as Jeff Lynne needs. Let’s get
onto the songs that pay him tribute…
We’ll start with a very funny song about how the Beatles
comeback is highjacked by record company bullshit (and isn’t John dead?). With
maybe a subtext about how the Legend of the Beatles is bigger than The Beatles
actually were. Jeff was heavily involved in that whole ridiculous Beatles
“comeback” in the 90s, but let’s not hold that against him.
And finally they get into the studio
To be co-produced by George Martin and Jeff Lynne
And Ringo’s disappointed to find that no one needs him anymore
Except for the vibe
Next, how can you resist a band called Moose & The
Grizzlies?
Sneaking in a little after 4
If you try and ask her where
She snaps like a Jeff Lynne snare
Back in the 70s, Jeff was accused of putting a devil-worshipping
backwards message in the ELO song Eldorado. Jeff’s typically self-deprecating
response was, “Anyone who can write a song played forwards and have it say
something else backwards has got to be some king of genius… and that I ain’t!”
An extract from the interview where he says just that is included at the end of
the Boards of Canada track Happy Cycling. But guess what? It’s played
backwards! See what they did there?
Rebecca Peake is the wife of cool astronaut Tim Peake. She
doesn’t make records as far as I can tell. However, her name is also used by
synthpop-shoegaze melders James Webster & Tech Honors.
La Casa Azul is the brainchild of Spanish singer, songwriter
and DJ Guille Milkyway, famous for producing songs you can listen to between
meals without ruining your appetite. (Admit it: you’d have done exactly the
same joke.) And he knows a secret about Jeff. I’m not sure what it is, but it’s
got something to do with Chris Montez…
Sueño, y en cada sueño intento no perderme y desvelar
El ansiado secreto de Jeff Lynne
Y creo que esta vez elegiré no despertar jamás
(I dream, and in each dream I try not to lose myself and
reveal
The long-awaited secret of Jeff Lynne
And I think this time I'll choose never to wake up)
Atlanta’s Paul Melancon caught my eye when I saw his music
described thus: “An indie-power-pop-singer-songwriter-angel-voiced-geeky kinda
thing.” Sounds right up my street. Although clearly he’d be much happier if he
was Jeff Lynne…
They say I do myself in
Things will pick up if I just try
Can’t they see that I
That I have tried
To be just like Jeff Lynne
That's a proper tribute!
However, the reason I chose to feature Jeff here today is
because of this. A brand new Christmas song from Grandaddy! Available to
download here, it’s already gone to the top of my Christmas tree.
This isn't my house. It's just a picture I found on the interweb. But it does represent (in grander fashion, perhaps) how many of us are seeing the world at the moment.
My "office" is now in the corner of a bedroom, staring out on a cul de sac and a footpath popular with dog walkers and those taking their allotted hour of daily exercise. I sit here trying to teach online classes (not the future) and avoid as many Teams meetings as I can, while the anxiety of having to work from home while also balance home-schooling Sam with Louise (who is also working from home) threatens to crush me.
I often find myself glancing out and watching the world go by, particularly when I'm on a call. The most entertaining thing is watching families, who clearly have never been on a family walk together pre-coronavirus, try to navigate this strange new world they've been forced into.
You take your light relief wherever you can grab it these days.
This is kinda appropriate, even though JWH is actually singing about about a window seat on a plane. Remember planes?
I've got so many series on the go at the moment, I can't keep up with them all. So here's a Top Ten of Grumpy Old Men songs (aided and abetted by a few grumpy old women) based around the idea that things were much better when I was a lad. Y'know: strikes, power-cuts, the three day week, Margaret Thatcher, the Yorkshire Ripper, Kajagoogoo... I'm talking the good old days now!
(Nothing personal against Kajagoogoo. They just have a funny name.)
When I did a google image search on "things ain't what they used to be", the above image popped up and I felt it somehow appropriate.
One of those songs you pick up on an old Uncut or Mojo CD, burn to your record library, then never actually listen to until 20 years later when you come up with a random post idea and... not bad, actually.
Amazing that this is the first time Neil Young has featured in my Grumpy Old Men series...
Talk to me, my long lost friend, tell me how you are Are you happy with your circumstance, are you driving a new car? Does it get you where you want to go, with a seven year warranty? Or just another hundred thousand miles away From the days that used to be
Can we ever live up to what our parents' generation went through. Probably not...
Whoah-oh, story after story Of all your faded glory Is all I ever hope to live up to Whoah-oh, know as I get older I'm standing on your shoulders Trying to be just like you But they don't make 'em like they used to
Most things change, but some things stay the same...
There's a freeway where we played football in the fields Apartments on the pitch at Highbury There's a shed called Deer Creek Of which my one critique Is there's no creek now and it's all deer-free
There's a Walgreens where there was no wall, just greenery There's a theme park in a palace in Tennessee That tree there is a pylon But some things you can rely on There's a Starbucks where the Starbucks used to be
Considering Marvin wrote this heartfelt plea for the ecology back in 1971, you can imagine him turning in his grave every time Donald The Trump opens his mouth.
Wait, you say. Those aren't the lyrics to a Max Bygraves song! They're the lyrics to The Kinks' 1983 comeback single, Come Dancing. True enough, but I bet Ray was thinking of Max's big hit from 23 years earlier when he penned those lines... if you don't believe me, just listen to the opening lines of Fings Ain't Wot They Used T'Be.
Here's a proper grumpy old man song for you! Go on, Max!
Album cover above by The 63 Crayons, a band I know nothing about, but they have a cool name. Google them if you have time, I've got just 15 minutes to write this post before my next class...
Cut & paste with your suggestions this week because of the above-mentioned time constraints. Thanks for all your contributions.
The Swede kicks us off (as is often the case) "Tanglewood 63 by Michael Gibbs springs immediately to mind, a tune quickly covered in a Jazz-Rock vein by Colosseum and several more times since."
Nice.
A lyrical offering from Charity Chic next... which could very well have been this week's winner, because it's an awesome tune...
In Winter 1963 It felt like like the world would freeze With John F Kennedy and the Beatles
Lynchie & Swiss Adam both went for New Order - 1963. Now, time prevents me from telling the full story, but suffice it to say there a deep scars from my teenage years involving New Order - I basically feel out and didn't speak to one of my best friends for 6 months, and New Order were indirectly responsible for that. They remain one of the two big 80s bands that I have never been able to find a moment's time for (the other being U2). I know the high esteem that many of my blogging peers hold them in... but they're highly unlikely to ever feature here until I can afford therapy.
Martin, extremely helpfully, even provided links with his suggestions this week... let's see how well they survive the Copy & Paste...
"Here is the street and here is the door Same as it was before And up the stairs and on the wall Is, Kiss and Terry Hall And Siouxsie Sioux and Edwin too And Bobby Dee in '63."
But it's Walter who takes this week's prize - as seconded by CC. Alyson even adds that "I seem to remember it was the soundtrack to my first kiss down the local youth club!" Which makes it a double-winner, surely? We can't beat this...
Anyway, got to go now, there's a queue of students outside the room, waiting to be educated...
Let's get this one out of the way, shall we? The link above is to the full 8 minute version, which features dry ice, cocktails, bombast, writhing girls in short leather dresses with too much make-up, soulless boardrooms, big hair, shoulder pads, meaningful glances, wine bars, pig-headed shadowplay, Freudian tunnels, trenchcoats, bad dancing... and smug, millionaire Tories.
Truly, it's everything that was wrong with the 80s in one horrendous video.
Although it does contain the lyric...
Will you embrace His penis is reckless?
No, really, it does - have a listen! If you can bear it.
The Dirty Tricks department, Is working overtime. Trying to stop the candidate, From getting in this time. The wheels are now in motion, All the traps are set. Under the commotion, He'll walk into this net.
The state's intoxicated, They're at the starting gate. He may never make it, To the planned T.V. debate.
He can't fight off the big bucks, Of the old brigade. He's gotta watch his step, In this Smear Campaign.
They called a snap election, In the summer heat. This town is reeling backwards, Like a drunk man on the street.
Yeah....
Feed those lies, bend those minds, At any price. Foul or fair, as long as he's not in there, Election Time.
...while JWH finds temporary romantic solace in the arms of another loser.
I met you on election night As we cried over our beers Nothing you could do would cheer me up We broke up later that year How come you and I aren't winners? Why weren't we born the other side?
Better hear what they have to say 'Cause the tables just might turn against you, brother Set around Election Day Politics and hypocrites Is turning us all into lunatics
4. Radiohead - Electioneering I will stop, I will stop at nothing. Say the right things when electioneering I trust I can rely on your vote. When I go forwards you go backwards and somewhere we will meet. When I go forwards you go backwards and somewhere we will meet. Ha ha ha
If Alice Cooper had stood against Trump, it would have been a very different story.
1. Billy Bragg - Ideology
Yes, the final word obviously has to go to Billy...
When one voice rules the nation Just because they're on top of the pile Doesn't mean their vision is the clearest The voices of the people Are falling on deaf ears Our politicians all become careerists They must declare their interests But not their company cars Is there more to a seat in parliament Then sitting on your arse? And the best of all this bad bunch Are shouting to be heard Above the sound of ideologies clashing Outside the patient millions Who put them into power Expect a little more back for their taxes Like school books, beds in hospitals And peace in our bloody time All they get is old men grinding axes Who've built their private fortunes On the things they can rely The courts, the secret handshake The stock exchange and the old school tie For god and queen and country All things they justify Above the sound of ideologies clashing God bless the civil service The nation's saving grace While we expect democracy They're laughing in our face And although our cries get louder Their laughter gets louder still Above the sound of ideologies clashing
This week, ten songs dedicated to idiots everywhere. Especially those in positions of power. Because, like a lot of people in the UK right now, I'm angry.
We need Woody Guthrie's guitar more than ever, it seems.
I think I'm going to let the songs do the talking this week...
There's no point for democracy when ignorance is celebrated
Political scientists get the same one vote as some Arkansas inbred
Majority rule don't work in mental institutions
Sometimes the smallest softest voice carries the grand biggest solutions
This is the hour of the idiot
That was a time when the crime could take command
This is the mirth of human brilliance
A wonderful hour of the idiots at hand
8. John Wesley Harding - Idiot's Delight
Power's aphrodisiac, addicts die of thirst
The new El Presidente saw his bubble finally burst
And the king returned from exile, by request to break the curse
He fulfils election promises with temporary cures
And everything's worse than it once was without the same allure
And his stepson is on squad inspection making overtures
It's alright
It's alright
It's alright tonight
Because it's all performed for the idiot's delight
It's all performed for the idiot's delight
Because it's all performed for the idiot's delight
Power's aphrodisiac, addicts die of thirst
The new El Presidente saw his bubble finally burst
And the king returned from exile, by request to break the curse
He fulfils election promises with temporary cures
And everything's worse than it once was without the same allure
http://www.lyricsofsong.com/w/kjmlji
And his stepson is on squad inspection making overtures
It's alright
It's alright
It's alright tonight
Because it's all performed for the idiot's delight
It's all performed for the idiot's delight
Because it's all performed for the idiot's delïght
Power's aphrodisiac, addicts die of thirst
The new El Presidente saw his bubble finally burst
And the king returned from exile, by request to break the curse
He fulfils election promises with temporary cures
And everything's worse than it once was without the same allure
http://www.lyricsofsong.com/w/kjmlji
And his stepson is on squad inspection making overtures
It's alright
It's alright
It's alright tonight
Because it's all performed for the idiot's delight
It's all performed for the idiot's delight
Because it's all performed for the idiot's delïght
Power's aphrodisiac, addicts die of thirst
The new El Presidente saw his bubble finally burst
And the king returned from exile, by request to break the curse
He fulfils election promises with temporary cures
And everything's worse than it once was without the same allure
http://www.lyricsofsong.com/w/kjmlji
And his stepson is on squad inspection making overtures
It's alright
It's alright
It's alright tonight
Because it's all performed for the idiot's delight
It's all performed for the idiot's delight
Because it's all performed for the idiot's delïght
British Lose Right to Claim That Americans Are Dumber
Take it away, Green Day...
Welcome to a new kind of tension.
All across the alienation.
Where everything isn't meant to be okay.
Television dreams of tomorrow.
We're not the ones who're meant to follow.
For that's enough to argue.
If you're in Heaven then you'll forgive me, dear
Because that's what they do up there
If you're in Hell, then what can I say?
You probably deserved it anyway
I guess I'm gonna find out any day
For we'll meet again
And there'll be Hell to pay
It was gravity which pulled us down and destiny which broke us apart
You tamed the lion in my cage but it just wasn’t enough to change my heart
Now everything’s a little upside down, as a matter of fact the wheels have stopped
What’s good is bad, what’s bad is good, you’ll find out when you reach the top
You’re on the bottom
