Thursday 13 October 2022

Cnut Songs #17: If You Can Read This, You’re Too Close

I was brought up to believe in stopping distances. Every Sunday morning, my father would drive us all to church, reminding us of the importance of leaving a good gap between us and the car in front. He practiced what he preached: the Highway Code to Heaven. His commandments stuck with me when I myself learned to drive, and his voice speaks to me whenever I drive through the valley of the shadow of death: or the English motorway system, as it’s now more commonly known.

These days though, I feel so alone in my faith. It’s not easy to follow Jesus (or whoever’s driving the car in front) and do the right thing (stay at least 75 metres behind him, at 70mph) when everyone else is ignoring the commandments. To the non-believers, the stopping distance isn’t there to protect you, to keep you safe and warm and happy and alive. It’s there to pull over into, because you just can’t wait to get ahead, or because you’ve left it to the very last second to change lanes for your exit. 

Atheists tell me the only reason I cling to my old-fashioned beliefs is some foolish notion of eternal life. The modern mantra appears to be: “We’re all going to die anyway, if it happens right now on the M1, so be it. If not, glory be, I arrived at my destination 30 seconds sooner.” But I don’t want to live forever. I just want to get home in one piece, see my son again, and have my tea. 

They say, “belief is the death of reason”. Well, I’d rather have dead reason than a dead body, thanks, so I’ll keep on believing, even if no one else does.


11 comments:

  1. You're not alone in this, Rol.

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  2. Much as I love this country, the driving really depresses me. I think it has the most road deaths per 1000 in western europe, and it certainly has at least twice that of the UK. Overtaking on a bend must be part of the driving test here. And as for keep your distance, it's just scary. Today I drove 50km and only had one person try to overtake..........in the face of oncoming traffic. And the road I was on is not a a major one.

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    1. You've clearly been there too long if you've stopped measuring distances in miles, George. What's 50km in old money?

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  3. I'm just glad I don't have to drive a car anymore.

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  4. I’m going to show Mr WIAA this one. He seems to find it impossible not to drive scarily close to the car in front and it freaks me out. Many an argument ensues, for good reason, I want to stay alive.
    Alyson

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    1. I hope I won't be the cause of any more rows... not on anniversary weekend!

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  5. I too have my Dad's voice chipping into my internal monologue as I drive. 'If in doubt, don't' was his mantra when behind the wheel. It's the phrase that runs through my mind every time I consider an overtaking manoeuvre.

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    1. My dad's internal monologue is often drowned out by Louise's external one if ever she's in the car with me... she hates every other driver on the road even more than I do.

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  6. Superb post, Rol. I too worship at the Church of the 3 Second Rule.

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