Snapshots Spillover: More Olympic Sport Songs

Even with 20 tunes in this week's Snapshots, I couldn't cover all the different sporting events in the Olympic Games... so here are a few silver medals...

Townes Van Zandt - Talkin' Karate Blues

Ben Folds Five - Boxing

The Brazen Hussies - Climbing the Wall

The Beach Boys - Surfin'

The Wildwood - Swimming

Sufjan Stevens - Javelin

Mickey & The Soul Generation - Football

Trashcan Sinatras - Weightlifting

Heartless Bastards - Marathon

Paul Robeson - Canoe Song

The Godz - Cross Country

Air Traffic - Shooting Star

Even then, I couldn't find all the sports. Perhaps you can help, if you know any songs about shot put, luge, curling, pentathlon, discus, et al...

My Top Ten x3 Songs

Not a lot of time today: the boss is driving me to an early grave. And as the boss is a Maths teacher, let's multiply that by three...

Ten song titles to the power of three...


10. The Pierces - Kill! Kill! Kill!

Some days, this seems like a very enticing prospect...

9. Heartless Bastards - Low Low Low

Don't let them get you down.

8. Skunk Anansie - Sad Sad Sad

What did I just say?

7. Genesis - Tonight Tonight Tonight

As if we weren't feeling bad enough!

6. The Yeah Yeah Yeahs - No No No

Double marks!

5. Chic - Dance Dance Dance

Yowsah! Yowsah! Yowsah!

Dancing obviously isn't going to cheer me up today.

However, if Chic doesn't get your toes twitching, you may prefer to dance to this... The Casualeers - Dance Dance Dance

4. Johnny Cash - Cry! Cry! Cry!

Yeah, it's getting that way, Johnny.

3. Abba - Money Money Money

And that, of course, is why we keep putting up with it.

2. Julian Cope - Try Try Try

No choice, Julian.

1. Housemartins - Joy Joy Joy

I was looking for a job and then I found a job, and heaven knows...

...but maybe one day I'll find one that makes me feel like this instead.



And as today is the first day of the month, I'll close with a good luck wish for all of us...

Rabbit

Rabbit

Rabbit

Any threesomes in your collection?

Saturday Snapshots #60 - The Answers

"What are the answers to yesterday's Saturday Snapshots, Rol? I Need To Know!"

Apparently this week's Saturday Snapshots was a tough one. OK guys, don't have a Breakdown. Hopefully you'll Feel A Whole Lot Better now... well done to Lynchie for reclaiming the early bird crown this week...



10. Nathaniel holds his own against the 7th rabbit house. Control.

Nate is short for Nathaniel and he is holding a dog.

Rabbits live in warrens. G is the 7th letter of the alphabet.

Warren G & Nate Dogg - Regulate

9. Goes with Bella and Mad to see the sun, wireless.

Bella-Donna
Mad-(D)onna.

Summer sun.

Wireless radio.

Donna Summer - On The Radio

8. Straightening the shelves, always in the same direction.

Whenever I put up a shelf, I have to make sure it's level.

Going in the same direction would be one way.

The Levellers - One Way

7. Uncaring sods go for a 42.195 kilometre run.

A bit obscure, but... tune!

Heartless Bastards - Marathon

6. Where prayers are answered... could be 50% better.

"The part of a Methodist meeting house formerly occupied by worshippers who responded to the preacher's utterances with occasional shouts of ‘Amen!’."

The Amen Corner - (If Paradise Is) Half As Nice

5. Portable computer goes through customs without any trouble.

If you don't know this one, you should give it a go. Kooky but fun.

Laptop - Nothing To Declare

4. Enterprise on rocky foundations.

The Enterprise was a Starship.

Starship - We Built This City (On Rock 'n' Roll)

Apparently, this has been voted the worst song of the 80s. Hard to imagine why, in a decade where Stock, Aitken & Waterman were active.

3. Fall singer becomes lunatic on the box.

Mark E. sounds very much like Marquee.

Lunatic means driven mad by the moon.

Television is The Box. (Although they're not really boxes anymore, are they?)

Television - Marquee Moon

2. Proustian detective agency from the 80s.

Proust was Marcel.

The Blue Moon Detective Agency was where David Addison & Maddie Hayes worked in the 80s.

The Marcels - Blue Moon

So much better than the Showaddywaddy cover... discuss?

1. Where Richard met Judy... after you left.

Richard Of York Gave Battle In Vain is a mnemonic to help you remember the colours in a rainbow.

Judy Garland went Somewhere Over The Rainbow.

I Won't Back Down. Saturday Snapshots returns next week!

My Top Ten Chocolate Bar Songs

Ten songs about chocolate bars... well, they could be. I saved this one till Lent was over because I knew some of you were being good. 


Special mention to The Drifters, Aerosmith, The Mars Volta and, ahem,  Thom Yorkie. 


10. The Crookes - Two Drifters

Greedy buggers - one's not enough for you?

9. Thea Gilmore - Brother, Can You Spare A Dime?

Thea may be down on her luck but she still hankers after a crunchy butter-almond chocolate treat from Sweden.

8. The Ataris - I.O.U. One Galaxy

So that's about, what, 75p? I'll let you off, lads.

7. Baxter Drury - Picnic On The Edge

Ian's son prefers to eat his in dangerous situations. Suede aren't much better - they eat theirs By The Motorway.

6. Orchestral Manouvres In The Dark - Walking On The Milky Way

Seems a waste of a perfectly good sweet you can eat between meals without ruining your appetite

5. Animals That Swim - Kit Kats and Vinegar

Not the most appetizing of combinations, but apparently it helps their mate get off his head (on the cheap).

4. John Grant - Caramel

Or you may prefer the equally delicious Suzanne Vega song of the same title. Or Take It Easy by The Eagles, which must have been about the same thing. 

3. Half Man Half Biscuit - Dickie Davies Eyes

God, I could murder a Cadbury's Flake,
Then I guess you wouldn't let me into heaven.
Or maybe you would 'cause their adverts promote oral sex!

See also Flakes by The Mystery Jets (which made its way into my Top Ten Breakfast Menu Songs).

2. Heartless Bastards - Marathon

I know, they're not called Marathons anymore, they've not been called Marathons for years. But until someone writes a song as good as this one and calls it 'Snickers', they'll always be Marathons to me.

Not that I ever liked Marathons. I hate peanuts.

1. The Undertones - Mars Bar

Time to raid the Spar, Feargal Sharkey needs to work, rest and play. (Although he has had ten so far.)

To anybody out there who still eats Twix
Anybody on packets of Buttons
I gave them up when I was six
I hope your teeth are rotten

Genius. See also, Marz by John Grant, which might not specifically be about the chocolate bar... but does mention lots of other sweet treats.





Which one is your guilty pleasure?

My Top Twenty Albums Of 2012 (20 - 11)

Rules are made to be broken! As is traditional, my year end countdown couldn't be limited to JUST ten records...



20. Kathleen Edwards - Voyageur

Perhaps it does lack the edge of some of her earlier releases, but it's still full of wonderful songs... and that gorgeous, gorgeous voice.

Recommended tracks: Change The Sheets, Chameleon / Comedian.

19. The King Blues - Long Live The Struggle

Very sad to hear The King Blues calling it a day with the release of this, their fourth album. At least lead singer Johnny 'Itch' Fox is continuing as a solo act.You can download his first EP free from his website.

Recommended tracks: Modern Life Has Let Me Down, Booted Out Of Hell.

18. Heartless Bastards - Arrow

A Texan band that has been around almost 10 years now, though I only discovered them very recently. The haunting Marathon is a song I've not been able to stop listening to since I first heard it.

Recommended tracks: Marathon, Only For You.

17. Richard Hawley - Standing At The Sky's Edge

After years crooning heartbreak like Roy Orbison reborn in Sheffield, Hawley went heavy. This album continues to grow on me - particularly the title track which has a foreboding menace I've not heard on record since Jim Morrison took his last bath.

Recommended tracks: Standing At The Sky's Edge, Down In The Woods.

16. Mull Historical Society - City Awakenings

Eight years after the last album released under the MHS name, Colin MacIntyre (who'd been recording under his own name in the meantime) dusted it off to produce possibly the band's finest moment. A record of shimmering beauty.

Recommended tracks: The Lights, Must You Get Low. 

15. Amanda Palmer - Theatre Is Evil

A new record from AFP is always something to celebrate. Especially as the lovely Ms. P continues to allow her fans to decide how much they want to pay to download her music. Neil must be proud.

Recommended tracks: Do It With A Rockstar, The Killing Type. Careful with those videos though: they contain generous lashings of sex, violence and unshaven armpits.

14. The Wedding Present - Valentina

Doesn't sound vastly different to the records David Gedge was making 25 years ago. Nobody writes first person kitchen sink relationship drama pop songs that verge on agony aunt confessionals in quite the same way.

I’ve been using you
All this time
And it’s not that I don’t adore you
Because I do
But I’ve realized
That I don’t think I
Am ever gonna leave my girlfriend
For you

Recommended tracks: Back At Bit... Stop, The Girl From The DDR.

13. First Aid Kit - The Lion's Roar

All the way from Sweden, a pair of country-folky sisters in thrall to Emmylou, Gram, Johnny and June. Really quite lovely.

Recommended tracks: Emmylou, The Lion's Roar.

12. Sweet, Sweet Lies - The Hare, The Hound & The Tortoise

Sounding like a butcher Divine Comedy (that is, a Divine Comedy that's more butch... not one that carves meat for a living) or Mumford & Sons with all the twee bits filed off by Shane MacGowan, Sweet, Sweet Lies were one of my most joyous accidental discoveries this year. I'm still waiting for the rest of the world to catch up.

She'll sing in key and play guitar
Like Johnny Cash and Johnny Marr
And she'll know the capital of Iceland...

Recommended tracks: Capital of Iceland, The Day I Change.

11. Cosmo Jarvis - Think Bigger 

Look, if you've not embraced the utter wonderfulosity of Cosmo Jarvis yet, I can only feel bad for you. So at least pretend you're a fan and keep me happy. 

Recommended tracks: The Girl From My Village, Sunshine.

 

OK, hold your horses, we'll get to the Top Ten tomorrow. In the meantime, enjoy these. Your ears will thank you.

My Top Ten Olympic Sport Songs

I've already covered running, jumping, gymnastics, swimming and cycling... here are a few songs about the remaining Olympic sports.

10. The Magic Theatre - Rowing Boat Love Song

If you were wondering whatever happened to Dan Popplewell and Sophia Churney of Ooberman, here's your answer... and it's quite, quite lovely.

9. MC Hammer - Can't Touch This

Stop.

Hammer time!

8. Slow Club - Horses Jumping

A song that covers a number of sporting disciplines, including swimming, sprint, pool and horses jumping... out of a boat. Don't ask me.

7. Heartless Bastards - Marathon

We're all racing for our own reasons

6. Beach Boys - Sail On, Sailor

If you were expecting Rod Stewart... isn't this so much better?

5. Operator Please - (Just A Song About) Ping Pong

Don't you know beef jerky has an aftertaste?

4. Prefab Sprout - I Never Play Basketball Now

After that last unholy row
I never, ever play basketball now.
It joins the list of things I'll miss
Like fencing foils and lovely girls I'll never kiss.

3. Julian Cope - Trampolene

No gold medal for Julian's spelling.

2. Trashcan Sinatras - Weightlifting

Pumping iron never sounded so beautiful.

1. Ben Folds Five - Boxing

Boxing's been good to him...



So... which one's your Olympian?